GANGSTER III: The call of the void

June 11, 2026February 28, 2026 / antakalipa / Leave a comment

So intrusive, the call of the void. I am thinking crime, conditioned to think that’s the only way somebody like me can get ahead. I watched too much TV to know it never works out. You can never break bad even if you are Gustavo Fring because a master manipulator like Heisenberg is in the background, pulling strings detonating bombs! Even if you avoid explosions and ignite them verbally like Saul Goodman they ultimately result in life imprisonment because you are sneaky, dishonest, a co-conspirator, a shape-shifter, silver tongue devil, a scumbag criminal lawyer!

The call of the void, so intrusive, destructive. I am thinking crime but I have watched enough Scorsese to know it never works out, even if you’re Henry Hill who aspired to be a gangster all his life. Cadillac’s and double-breasted suits and you are never secured. Living a life of paranoia, death can come from anywhere, a volitile existence, your murderers come with a smile. Once Goodfellas and now you gotta rat on your friends, it’s bye-bye if you don’t – you’re gonna get whacked!

The call of the void, so intrusive but it never works out even if you are Anthony Soprano. Rose from a soldier to a Capo, to the boss! Living the dream life in a mansion with a pool with your childhood sweetheart Carmella and married with two wonderful children. The crown is heavy, it’s difficult to be number 1, you are a constant moving target, other gangsters want your crown, plagued by constant nightmares, you are a mess psychologically, trust issues and once in a while you have to shed blood to maintain the peace or you will get toppled. No room for weakness. You still die in front of your family in the end and the screen turns to black before the end of your favorite song.

The call of the void, so intrusive, I am thinking crime but that never works out even if you avoid the wire and still run the streets with your shotgun like Omar Little, the legendary cocksucker. Mr. Rob drug dealers, it’s all in the game. The tune of his whistle and everyone in the streets scatters like flees. Induces fear and is respected by the most hardened criminals. Rock solid reputation. Still got taken out by a kid, a nobody because he doesn’t fear him nor his reputation – the new ushers out the old.

The call of the void, maybe Marlow, took out Proposition Joe and won his battle with the Barksdales but lost his muscle to jail. When he came out, the world had moved on, the streets didn’t know who he was. Despite his ruthless disposition and taking out all his competition, he didn’t leave a lasting legacy, couldn’t build a self-sustaining reputation – he became another player in the game who was at the helm for a while but fell off.

Call of the void, so intrusive, I am thinking crime like the Godfather but I could never be like Vito Corleone. A reasonable man, practical, patient, fair but ruthless. A master of human nature, a strategist who plans a 100 moves ahead, an immortal who survived five shots. He knew “the black hand” was phony, he settled for less money, he is not a real mafia, he threatened Vito with the police, where’s the code of Omerta? He is taking chances. Vito played the fool to catch him off guard and took him out to begin his ascent to the top. Vito Andolini Corleone, suffered the death of his father, mother and eldest brother to the mafia, the Don. Escaped to America, made a life for himself, rose up in rank, avenged the death of his family by later killing the Don and became the boss of all bosses of the criminal underworld. He died an old man playing with his grandson in his tomato garden but also lost his eldest son in a hail of bullets.

Call of the void, so intrusive, I am thinking crime but that never works out even if you are Tony Montana and think the world is yours. The cocaine gets to your head and you think you are invincible! You kill your best friend Manolo and a rival, Sosa sends assassins and kills your sister Gina. On top of the world because of the cocaine but you die in a hail of bullets in the fountain pool of your mansion – Sosa did tell you not to cross him!

Call of the void, so intrusive, I am thinking crime. I need money, I need to start a family, time is in a hurry and I am not getting any younger.

GANGSTER

March 27, 2025December 8, 2025 / antakalipa / Leave a comment

GANGSTER

We all try. I think that human beings are inherently good but our circumstances and environment dictate our destiny. How can I be like the picture perfect people on my screens when I am primed to be incarcerated. Surrounded by drugs, violence, guns, death and sex. I am hungry, I want to get to the top and there’s no telling what I might do to get there, pushing you under the bus is a small price to pay for the rest of my life. If you stand in between me and my meal ticket, I won’t hesitate smashing you with a bat behind your head leading to your eye popping out the socket onto the floor. I like gangster shit, that’s how you get things done. If they won’t give me what I want then I’ll take it by force with the help of Mr. 9 mm and if you want war, his cousin AK-47 is keeping watch and ready to unload a hail of bullets on your unconscious, lifeless body. There’s an attraction to being a gangster, who wouldn’t want the autonomy of doing what they wanted, to be feared, respected and idolized. Cause gangsters can do anything they want, they can fuck any girl they want, they have all the money, the get preferential treatment, they drive the latest cars, they kill at will and government officials are in their pockets. Gangsters just don’t give a fuck, honorable mention ‘Crazy’ Joe Gallo, he did anything he wanted like kidnapping his bosses without the threat of any repercussion, he just didn’t give a shit, he lived on the darkside, it engulfed his actions, he loved the chaos, he loved being a gangster! Stealing from you is my pleasure and if you make trouble for me I’ll beat you up so bad you’ll start feeding from a straw, that’s if I don’t kill you and your whole offspring. Also, you need to start paying me for protection or your business is going under. I am not interested in the soldiers on the ground, they are disposable and will rat on you to get immunity, I am more interested in high ranking officials of Cosa Nostra like Michael Corloene or being the Capo like Anthony Soprano. They have a code of ethics and values they live by and they won’t hesitate to splatter your brains like tomato juice if you cross the line. Fredo was a stupid and careless Underboss who compromised the future of the family and had to die, he broke a simple code, a simple law known Universally, “the boss is the boss, never outshine the master”.

Everyone rats, police can flip anyone with the promise of immunity and witness protection programs, we saw this on Goodfellas with Henry Hill ratting on all his friends. The look on Jimmy Conway’s face when Henry pointed at him from the stand was one of betrayal but he knows the game, survival triumphs everything. Would you rather serve a 100 years in prison instead? The Godfather and The Sopranos were no different, it seems that the only people who can’t rat on you are the dead ones. The decision to fly in Frank Pentangeli’s brother for the deposition was a masterstroke from Michael Corloene and once again, he saved the family. Pentangeli nearly fucked things for the Corleone family as multiple counts of perjury faced Michael. And despite being Tony’s best friend for a lifetime, Pussy took a deal and conspired to bring Tony Soprano down. He wore wires, leaked information to the authorities and compromised the whole organization. Luckily Tony got to the bottom of it and along with the crew ended Pussy’s life with a hail of bullets. Your best friend of many decades, your family, they will rat on you if it serves their best interests! Being a gangster is all about self-preservation. To be in the game is to understand the stakes, death is on the corner and can happen anytime. You won’t see it too, if you are in a crew nobody’s going to tell you that you are going to get whacked, it just happens. In a world of deceit and ruthlessness paranoia triumphs and it’s easier to take everyone out like on Casino, cause a dead witness can’t say anything. Strictly business, nothing personal. I could be a gangster cause morality doesn’t matter in a Universe where everything ultimately perishes. At least now I benefit, I get the the drugs, fuck bitches, wear quality clothes, drive expensive cars and live in Mansions as big as Tony Montanas. I could paint houses for Russell Buffalino and Jimmy Hoffa following instructions to the smallest detail. I could be a gangster, I am not a 9 to 5 guy, the money is too slow and the hours too long. I’d rather pull the trigger to end your life in a second and make a fortune. I could be a gangster because life is already a game of self-preservation and power struggles, why not play on a professional level? I could be a gangster cause I was born in the hood, I know what happens in the hood, I understand people and what motivates them and I can dominate the hood. I could be a gangster, maybe not a Mob boss or the head of my own Capo but I’ll be the best damn soldier on the ground. I could be a gangster cause Machiavelli taught me its better to be feared than loved and I think he is right. I could be a gangster, I am reasonable, ambitious and a strategist like Vito Corleone, I have it in me to build an empire from the ground up. Killing in cold blood? That’s a small prize to pay for greatness, a war needs casualties and I’d be prepared to make that sacrifice. After all, everybody dies and the deaths would be justified, I am an honorable and fair man. Threats, intimidation and extortion I could be a gangster, my objective is power and the fear from your eyes gives me a rush. I could be a gangster cause they don’t want to give me what’s due to me so I’ll take it! I could be a gangster, cause we all try.

“Wait! Don’t shoot Gangster! I am you and you are me”.

GANGSTER

February 28, 2023June 20, 2023 / antakalipa / Leave a comment

GANGSTER

We all try. I think that human beings are inherently good but our circumstances and environment dictate our destiny. How can I be like the picture perfect people on my screens when I am primed to be incarcerated. Surrounded by drugs, violence, guns, death and sex. I am hungry, I want to get to the top and there’s no telling what I might do to get there, pushing you under the bus is a small price to pay for the rest of my life. If you stand in between me and my meal ticket, I won’t hesitate smashing you with a bat behind your head leading to your eye popping out the socket onto the floor. I like gangster shit, that’s how you get things done. If they won’t give me what I want then I’ll take it by force with the help of Mr. 9 mm and if you want war, his cousin AK-47 is keeping watch and ready to unload a hail of bullets on your unconscious, lifeless body. There’s an attraction to being a gangster, who wouldn’t want the autonomy of doing what they wanted, to be feared, respected and idolized. Cause gangsters can do anything they want, they can fuck any girl they want, they have all the money, the get preferential treatment, they drive the latest cars, they kill at will and government officials are in their pockets. Gangsters just don’t give a fuck, honorable mention ‘Crazy’ Joe Gallo, he did anything he wanted like kidnapping his bosses without the threat of any repercussions, he just didn’t give a shit, he lived on the darkside, it engulfed his actions, he loved the chaos, he loved being a gangster! Stealing from you is my pleasure and if you make trouble for me I’ll beat you up so bad you’ll start feeding from a straw, that’s if I don’t kill you and your whole offspring. Also, you need to start paying me for protection or your business is going under. I am not interested in the soldiers on the ground, they are disposable and will rat on you to get immunity, I am more interested in high ranking officials of Cosa Nostra like Michael Corloene or having my own Capo like Anthony Soprano. They have a code of ethics and values they live by and they won’t hesitate to splatter your brains like tomato juice if you cross the line. Fredo was a stupid and careless Underboss who compromised the future of the family and had to die, he broke a simple code, a simple law known Universally, “the boss is the boss, never outshine the master”.

Everyone rats, police can flip anyone with the promise of immunity and witness protection programs, we saw this on Goodfellas with Henry Hill ratting on all his friends. The look on Jimmy Conway’s face when Henry pointed at him from the stand was one of betrayal but he knows the game, survival triumphs everything. Would you rather serve a 100 years in prison instead? The Godfather and The Sopranos was no different, it seems that the only people who can’t rat on you are the dead ones. The decision to fly in Frank Pentangeli’s brother for the deposition was a masterstroke from Michael Corloene and once again, he saved the family. Pentangeli nearly fucked things for the Corleone family as multiple counts of perjury faced Michael. And despite being Tony’s best friend for a lifetime, Pussy took a deal and conspired to bring Tony Soprano down. He wore wires, leaked information to the authorities and compromised the whole organization. Luckily Tony got to the bottom of it and along with the crew ended Pussy’s life with a hail of bullets. Your best friend of many decades, your family, they will rat on you if it serves their best interests! Being a gangster is all about self-preservation. To be in the game is to understand the stakes, death is on the corner and can happen anytime. You won’t see it too, if you are in a crew nobody’s going to tell you that you are going to get whacked, it just happens. In a world of deceit and ruthlessness paranoia triumphs and it’s easier to take everyone out like on Casino, cause a dead witness can’t say anything. Strictly business, nothing personal. I could be a gangster cause morality doesn’t matter in a Universe were everything ultimately perishes. At least now I benefit, I get the the drugs, fuck bitches, wear quality clothes, drive expensive cars and live in Mansions as big as Tony Montanas. I could paint houses for Russell Buffalino and Jimmy Hoffa following instructions to the smallest detail. I could be a gangster, I am not a 9 to 5 guy, the money is too slow and the hours too long. I rather pull the trigger to end your life in a second and make a fortune. I could be a gangster because life is already a game of self-preservation and power struggles, why not play on a professional level? I could be a gangster cause I was born in the hood, I know what happens in the hood, I understand people and what motivates them and I can dominate the hood. I could be a gangster, maybe not a Mob boss or the head of my own Capo but I’ll be the best damn soldier on the ground. I could be a gangster cause Machiavelli taught me its better to be feared than loved and I think his right. I could be a gangster, I am reasonable, ambitious and a strategist like Vito Corleone, I have it in me to build an empire from the ground up. Killing in cold blood? That’s a small prize to pay for greatness, a war needs casualties and I’d be prepared to make that sacrifice. After all, everybody dies and the deaths would be justified, I am an honorable and fair man. Threats, intimidation and extortion I could be a gangster, my objective is power and the fear from your eyes gives me a rush. I could be a gangster cause they don’t want to give me what’s due to me so I’ll take it! I could be a gangster, cause we all try.

“Wait! Don’t shoot Gangster! I am you and you are me”.