I love how women can unite men. Like “My man, you see that girl with the fat ass, Imma fuck her!” Yea, my nigga such life affirming language, I love it! Go for it, do you need any help? I can play your number 5 like Puyol, most recently Virgil van Dijk. I will do my best to help you in your course. Let’s get this pussy, life is meant to be enjoyed. Let’s make the best of it! We were at a wedding and these group of hot women wanted to take pictures. They had a cameraman. I knew my only way through that group was the cameraman. So, I bid my time. I studied everything and made notes but I was not close to gaining access. Then through God’s grace and implacable timing, my cousin came up to me and said “That cameraman needs an assistant, can you do it?”. I said man, “For sure!”. It was like a Bruno Fernandes assist. Don’t worry Cuz’, I’ll do this for us. Them bitches are going to be with us! I did as I promised and later we were with the whole squad of hot women. I was a hero. Brock Lesnar! The beast! Sleep, eat, break the streak! We had a great night. We had moments. We were vibing. But it was late, they had to go. Pleasantries were made but I didn’t take a number. The gents had a great time, I am happy, at least I made them accessible. Everyone was grateful, the energy was cool. And so four months later, I get a call from Cuz’. He said, “Remember those women? They want us again. You game?”. I was like “For sho”. We had transportation, accommodation, capital for transactions and the whole weekend. Life rewards action. Do those small things right and your life will be plentiful in dividends and income generating streams. You will be great. But remember to be grateful. That’s the great law. Amazing things happen. Every move counts, this is game-theory and I am the computer that beat Lee Sedol, I Go faster like Dwayne Johnson. In the end we all get what we deserve. If events stand the test of time, they are good. Stay consistent and walk confidently in the face of adversity. You will conquer, you always do. Just like that my nigga and I were reunited again, it’s gonna be a great day!
I learned from the Greeks that there are 3 types of love. Phila which is a kind of love that is platonic, a kind you feel for a friend, a close acquaintance or a family member. Then we have Eros which is a kind of love with passion. It seeks gratification from another person. It is hot, steamy, sultry and sexy. It is cupid’s arrow on your ass. It is a spell cast on you. Finally, we have one that is called Agape, and this kind of love is unconditional love. It is a love you share for all of mankind. A love you share for life. It is paternal in a sense that it can never be taken away. It is easy and natural as breathing. It is forever.
I am in love with a girl and our connection is platonic, Phila. She makes me feel good. She makes the effort. Has a great smile and just cares for me. She is a friend but that’s not enough for me because all I am thinking about is possession. My body yearns for her. She runs through my mind like a marathon champion, for hours, for days. I can’t get over her embraces. She covers me like a blanket and keeps me warm from this cold world. She inspires a lot of love out of me. She makes me passionate. All that I have in the fiber of my being is Eros. Regardless, I can’t act on it. I need to focus on the future that I am building. I am infatuated with the feeling of power and I want it all. And there’s no use trying to hide it, I am aiming at a billion. But as of now, I am broke like window, my short comings are transparent. I don’t think it’s fair to put you through that. I don’t think it’s fair to reserve you like a bus seat. I don’t think it’s fair to waste your time. And so you’re are my sacrifice. I know I would’ve lost you by the time I am millionaire. Time waits for no man and I understand. I know I want you now more than ever because you’ve got someone in your life. Somebody to love you and care for you. You win some and you lose some and this lose is devastating for me because I had plans. I wanted to start a family with you from scratch, build you a home for you and our children. Travel the world and there would be a reserve of capital for all your dreams. I would stack it up and you can offload. You can support courses with the money and be a humanitarian with your pure heart. You could be a super businesswoman and be respected by all your peers. I had dreams of me and you conquering the world. Maybe these are stupid dreams, maybe you just want a simple life. Maybe you just want to pay your tab and gracefully die. Maybe you are not interested in wealth and power and that my value system is flawed. Maybe Cinderella’s glass shoe just won’t fit. Damn! I can’t believe that I am going to lose you someday. Still, I hope you find love and happiness. I hope you have a perfect life and everything comes out the way you imagined. You have my unconditional love, Agape. I love you in all the Greek categories. My love for you is wholesome. My love for you is diversified. My love for you is forever, eternal.
Senses are an amazing thing for a human being. They color in the world, give it textures and sensations, they give it ordour and imagination. Senses make the world real. Imagine if we couldn’t touch, taste, smell, hear and see. What would our world be like? The world is a beautiful feeling process and then we die. Everything is governed by our emotions, they dictate our course of life. I have this girl who nearly short circuited my mind. Feel good chemicals like dopamine and serotonin were induced in a radical way. Adrenaline spiked up, I could feel my blood transmitting in the body and in no time I was errect like the Effel tower. My emotions were hijacked by what I saw and heard on my screen. It was euphoric and I couldn’t think straight. I was blinded and deaf to everything besides my phone. She captivated me and held my attention like a new born baby but she could drop it, it wasn’t about morality she was just a tease, a tease who made me contemplate about all the things I wanted to do to her. Some of these things weren’t ethical but that was her plan, to make me crazy and out of bound with reality. She hypnotized me like Charcot with her movements. They were slow and gradual like premeditated murder. She left everything to the imagination, undressing one item at a time. I was locked in a trance of her swaying body that swinged like a pendulum, completely sugestable like a MK Ultra patient. I was a blank screen attuned to her like a satellite and I could see her crystal clear as she stood next to the camera completely nude and exposed. She started touching herself, it was slow and rhythmic. She touched her boobs that were so rich in details in a circular motion and squeezed moaning like a detained prisoner. She was sexy and it was a show for me. She gave me goosebumps. She went downtown and began exploring like a voyager. She located the most sensitive arsenal in her body, the clit which has over eight thousand nerve endings, it was a button that could make her erupt like a volcano. And so she pressed multiple times and stimulated it, she got hot between her thighs and started calling out my name repeatedly. Damn! I went crazy, I exploded like Hiroshima! The sight of her and her voice calling out my name, moaning and groaning initiated a change in my physiology. My eyes popped out of my eye sockets and my ears were like satellites. My attention to my phone was akin to a neurosurgeon. My palms became sweaty and my existence was heightened. I was alive, horny and present. It was torture because I was on the other side of the world watching like a bystander on the street. Even with a loaded pistol I couldn’t do anything. All I wanted to do was to have her in my arms, to please her, to reunite her with the God’s but it was all in vain. Reality hit me like a sniper on the roof and my excitement was dead like JFK. Consciousness took control and I willed myself to close the video she had sent me. Although I watched 97% of it. The blood in my body started getting cold and my cock went flaccid. I scrolled down all the nudes she sent me, it was a sad reality.
I am in love again and this time it’s real. Yes! I am excited. The last time I was in love, I was frustrated by it, I didn’t know what to do, I was overcome and overwhelmed with emotions I didn’t understand. I didn’t have control over my mind, I just felt so vulnerable and exposed. But this time, damn I could touch the sky. I could fly like Superman and tap dance on the moon. I feel lighter on my feet. Mr. Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. She cast a spell on me, she bewitched me and I am okay with it. I am at ease with it. I am relieved, happy, and in love like a fool. Struck by Cupids multiple arrows. Hallucinating on a love trip that’s more potent than DMT, the spirit molecule. Thinking about her makes me creative, she is a great work of art. I am attracted to her like the opposite pole of a magnet. Animal magnetism, she reels me in like a fisherman and I am the fish hopelessly attached to the hook. I sometimes have nightmares about losing creativity but now I am saved, redeemed from my subconscious mind. She is my lifeboat, my life-saver. I now understand the concept of love. To show your scars and weaknesses and have somebody accept you for everything you are. To build a sustainable life and future with that person, to share your life, to grow old together, to plan, have children. It is liberating. It validates existence. It gives you peace. It is purpose. She is truly something special. Absolutely beautiful too. Great smile, it radiates and spreads all over existence like the sun’s rays. I realized that I was in love when I was in denial. I was terrified of my own feelings, terrified of what they meant. I tried to surpress this girl in my mind but she keeps popping up like a jack in the box. She roams around in my mind slowly and with great stealth like a thief in the night. She is always at the back of my mind like a shadow. I am so gone. I have no chance. I have no defense for her wit and overall personality. Like Usher, I am so caught up and these are my confessions. It’s been a long time coming, everyone cracks under sustained pressure. Man, I am in love with her, she treats me well. The energy is good and I am addicted to her like sugar, she gives me a rush! If I could, I would treat her well. My meaning in this world would be derived from that. After all, man has a subconscious urge to please woman, it’s in his DNA, it’s all he is. If a woman can’t motivate you, what can? In a cold world where nothing really matters and nobody really cares, she cares. She is warm and nourishing like body butter. That’s deep, like the dead sea salt in Israel, she exfoliates my soul, purifies my pores from within. I feel blessed. I am in love. In love with everything she is, I am infatuated. She is perfect. The best woman in the world. My African woman. Thinking about her makes me feel numb and carefree, like a sort of high you get from smoking chronic. I am not tripping, she is kind hearted, intelligent and special. She makes me feel at peace like graveyards in suburbs, she is my “Coco” the love of my life and I hope she always remembers me or my soul will perish forever. She is my medication, she makes me high of life, my chronic lady.
I am repressed. My subconscious thoughts are dictating my life. Of course, this is about a woman. The feminine energy rules the world because it is fundamental, it’s energy conceives and creates. The masculine energy can of course excert itself but I feel it’s in vain because behind every great man is a woman. Man has an unconscious urge to please woman. This energy makes man greater. It is life defining. Man is nothing without woman. This is illustrated on the Bible with the tale of Adam and Eve. Eve gives Adam the apple so that he can be conscious, how beautiful is that? How beautiful is woman? You know a creator exists because woman exists, what a gift for man! Damn! I love girls, girls, girls, girls, girls, girls I do adore! Thank you Jigga, for bringing that into the world. But I also understand why women were suppressed for so long. I understand why they didn’t have rights. I understand why their roles were reduced to housewife. Imagine a woman who understands her self-worth, one who is intelligent, opinionated and has dreams, dreams she will one day conquer. Damn! I think I am erect. Don’t you think that’s dangerous? Don’t you think that’s powerful? Women already run the world unconsciously and if you give them tools and resources they will take over the universe. And so I understand the fear eminating from the masculine point of view. How could I not? I am masculine and well feminine is powerful. Feminine is dangerous. It is chaotic like abstract art on a canvas. It is beautiful. Feminine energy defines the world, it gives it meaning and substance. Feminine energy makes life worthwhile. And so I am in this boat ruminating about this feminine species that drives me absolutely crazy. She is the manifestation of my wildest dreams. Damn! She is impressive. Hey Kanye, congratulations on your work with “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” it is an absolute classic. What happened there? My goodness, you truly are a genius, a creative of the highest order. Better than Steve Jobs, wait can I say that? Okay, let me rather say in my top 5 with Steve Jobs. But I digress. My mind takes me places sometimes and I can’t understand the flights of my thoughts but everything eventually connects. I was talking about this girl who drives me wild. I am planning on being sexual so brace yourself.
I don’t want to bore anyone with the details of her life so I will start with the day where she illuminated the world for me. Of course she was always hot and impressive. But on this day I was thinking about her. I had premeditated motives. I wanted her. I wanted her body. I wanted to bring her to my room and have my way with her. It wasn’t the first time I had these thoughts about her. Thoughts of absolute possession. Thoughts of pleasing her with a cascade of pleasure. All I could visualize was her perfect body, her natural perfect boobs that have so much detail in them, I am talking veins and succulent nipples. All I could think about was descending to her lotus flower bomb! Great work Wale. All I could think about was pleasing her, making her scream with delight, making her orgasm like fireworks in the sky, all I could think of was fulfilling her in every way. She haunted my conscious reality. All I could smell was her, all I could see were her lips and kissing her would give me so much pleasure. Kissing all of her being, kissing her lips, her neck, her shoulders, her boobs, her stomach, her thighs and her lotus flower bomb! Explosive we would be in bed. Missionary is good but I’ve got variety, there isn’t any style that we wouldn’t explore, I am talking Kama Sutra and the art of eroticism. I had so much imagination and she stared in every production. She was the girl I wanted desperately. I wanted to be in her, to penetrate her. Damn! What I would do to have a night with her. Permission and seduction is such a bore. I understand the impulse of the rapist. He won’t wait for all of that and I respect that. When I saw her that day the top of my head nearly fell on the ground. It was like the Universe was playing a trick on me. My mind couldn’t comprehend her level of hotness. Her level of hotness was on steroids, the scale was tipped, her energy had spikes, she was incredible! I am talking make-up, hair, apparel EVERYTHING! She has natural hair and well, I am a sucker for natural hair. It is a deadly weakness that leaves me on my knees drooling. Natural hair is the most beautiful thing on a woman especially if it’s well taken care off. On this day she wore a black dress, it reached before her knees. It complimented all her body features. She was incredible! All I could see was her yellow thighs. Damn! All those premeditated thoughts came rushing in like a packed train. I don’t know why the Universe sometimes does this to me, but okay, I accept and I am grateful for the experience. I was at the mercy of her, I was weak and there was nothing I could do. Her energy was too strong for me and my subconscious mind was in control, controlled by the unconscious mind driven by the feminine energy, I was bewitched, under a trance and at that moment there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her including wrapping the world and giving it to her, and because I am not a rapist, I am writing this instead.
I want to live the good life because what’s the use of having a mediocre existence in a place where we will all perish? There is no re-run, no second life like Pacman, no heaven as promised, just nothing. A cold world where nobody cares about me, where nobody loves me. Why settle to be on the podium when you can be a winner? I want to be a multi-billionaire and then give it all away like my hero, my god Mr. Warren Buffet. I want to eat the best food and live in the best houses. I want the best personal trainer because health is true wealth. I want an overpaid nanny whose highly-qualified to look after my children. Not because I don’t want to raise them myself because I do, this is about allocating resources and focused attention, it is about buying time and ensuring my time is utilized to the maximum. I will be there for my children every step of the way, I will be there in all the important moments of their life, I will be a great dad. I will teach them about business, money and creating intergenerational wealth. I want to travel the world and expose myself to different cultures. I want to learn a foreign language. I want to learn German, Spanish and Chinese. I want to watch “El Classico” at the Camp Nou and the Santiago Bernabou. I want that blend of Mercedes-Benz and Maybach. I want a BMW so I can do doughnuts. I want quality pussy, the best pussy in the world! I want to master the piano. I want to win the PSL. I want to do everything I can humanly do. I want to be the best that I can be. Because what’s the use of doing average, of being average? How can I head for mediocrity knowing that one day I will succumb to my mortal decaying body? Knowing that one day my bones will fail to keep me up. Knowing that my organs will give up on me. Knowing that my youth is not eternal. Knowing that I’ll be gone someday and nobody will remember me or what I did for the world. Knowing that this life is meaningless. How can I consciously strive for mediocrity? What will I be saving myself for? Why not fight with everything I have to achieve this? Why not delay gratification for this ideal? Why not be a fool for a while for this vision? Forget it, I am never settling, not in this lifetime. I’d rather be a loser because you don’t understand. It simply doesn’t make sense for me and I am a reasonable man, a practical man. I am not setting up myself for being something less than I couldp be. I didn’t invest 200 hours of my life reading Proust to work in retail. With all the respect in the world, I would rather die, I welcome death, I am not afraid of death. I am also not growing up too, forget it! I am a grown ass child. I will remain a child at heart until death comes calling. Maybe my actions don’t make sense now, but they will, soon the world will understand my greatness even though it will be temporary in the scope of time. I am leaving a mark in this Universe or I am going to die trying. My impact will be like smoke, it will linger around for a while before it completely subsides. These are not grandiose thoughts or the ego talking, it is my nature, it is what it is. I am going to do everything I want, nothing is going to stop me, stopping me is an impossible task! Time will prove me right.
Love yourself right now, at this moment, at this second. Love everything about yourself. Love your big eyes, your big ears, your big forehead, your small nose, your slanted small eyes, your big lips, your rectangular face, your large hands, your small feet, your fat ass and your small breats. Be content with everything you are. Be grateful to see the beauty life has in store. Be happy to attract happiness in your life. Make it a deliberate practice to be happy, to love yourself. The world mirrors and reflects our thoughts, so think positive thoughts to attract positive outcomes. Our thoughts are energies that become concrete things in the objective world. We are what we think about most of the time. You are responsible for everything that happens in your life, everyday, every time, 100% percent of the time. Everything is a consequence of what happens inside of you. Everything is within you. Zithande and the world will love you. Respect yourself. Treat yourself like loyalty, someone with pedigree and affluence to attract that in the world. Treat yourself like someone who matters. The answer is hardly out in the world. You are where you are in the world because of your choices. It’s your fault you never became what you always wanted. Zithande to control your self-image and to switch your paradigm. Zithande to increase your self-awareness. On a fundamental level we are all energies who inhibit a biological system. This biological system is the default, it is a given, hereditary from our long ancestry line that descends from primates. Our biological bodies are a product of the lottery of life. We don’t choose who we are, where we are born, our social class or who our families are. Love what you have. Embrace who you are, cherish your culture, beliefs and customs, be grateful for your current circumstance, be grateful for your friends and your family, be grateful for life. Make the best out of life. Forgive your parents, they don’t know any better, they are just like you. Understand that life is difficult and don’t waste your time and energy on things you can’t change. Feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, depression and stress are a waste of thoughts, time and energy. Plastic surgery or other techniques to modify or alter your body and facial features may promise a new start to your fabricated reality but it is an illusion, a deception because it doesn’t emanate from within. You will never find happiness, you will always be dissatisfied with what you have or who you are. True change happens from within, don’t look for solutions in the external world from problems brewing internally. Live in the present, forget the past and let the Universe deal with the future. Zithande, love your beautiful melanin skin or your bright, golden skin. Love your natural hair or that scar on your face. Love the frikkles on your face and that birth mark on your neck. Walk talk with your stiletto heels pushing that ironing board behind. Love your round figure or the fat in your body. Zithande, master yourself, search for answers from within, believe in yourself with blind faith, be positive to attract positive outcomes, flourish, dominate and be the best that you can be! Go out in the world expecting to win. The world is happening for you and not to you. Let the world bend to your rules. If someone doesn’t like you – tough, you are not changing for anyone. Be unwavering in your conduct and values. Zithande, love all of you without any conditions or contradictions. Anything you want in the world you can have if you just love and believe in yourself. Don’t wait for the world to confirm what you already know, Zithande. The world can’t tell you who you are or how to feel. Social media can’t dictate your worth. Never let anybody steal your shine. When your voice on the inside is more profound, clear and loud than the opinions outside, you have mastered your life.
On the epic song by Jay-Z and Kanye West “No Church in the world”, Kanye West points out that love is ruined by monogamy. This is an interesting sentiment, one that disputes the validity of a marriage institute. Marriage is an institution created by the church to unite people who love each other romantically. It wasn’t always like this, to get married because of emotions and feelings would be considered an obscenity in the good old days of the past. People got married for reasons that were practical economically, they joined to unite fortunes and establish a powerbase. Marriage was a legal binding entity used to preserve wealth among families. It was not a measure of one’s love and dedication. However, going forward things changed with the entrance of the romantics. They affected and changed culture in a big way. Writers and poets started making an art form of this phenomena known as love. It was contagious and spread all over the world. De Beers located a diamond mine in South Africa but since diamonds had no value, they created value through the visuals of Hollywood movies and ads on billboards and newspapers – it was a frenzy, diamonds were everywhere, on printed media, billboards, television, in music and referenced by poets. Diamonds were made desirable. They were made valuable. They now demonstrated the love you had for your partner. Culture derived, formulated and concluded that your engagement ring should be worth at least 3 months of your paycheck. It was a madhouse and everyone was in the delirium. For their efforts, De Beers made riches and they continue to own the diamond market in the world. Their success is attributed to the romantic age. The romantic age contained an impractical people. Indoctrinated in the constitution of the church, they believed in monogamy that is one partner for one man. The Romantics added to that and proclaimed that this partner should complete and fulfill you. The romantics United love and sex. The romantics were irrational, deluded and impractical. An institution that unites love and sex is flawed simply because sex is a form of expression. Sex is gratifying a desire. Sex is individuality. Sex procreates. It is possible to love you and not be sexually attracted to you. In the same way that I can have a mistress that I have sexual relations with and not love. In fact, it is the norm in our culture. We see this on books like “The Great Gatsby” with the characters of Tom Buchanan, Daisy, Tom’s mistress and Gatsby. Dispite his known infidelity, Tom goes back home to Daisy. We see this with Daisy too, she has an affair with Gatsby and later goes back to Tom. For Tom, Daisy represents stability, his heart and it is the same with Daisy. Their infidelities don’t mean that they don’t love each other. This is also exhibited on the 1974 movie “Emmanuelle”, where Emmanuelle’s partner doesn’t marry her for mere possession, he marries her because he loves her. He encourages her to explore her sexual desires and fantasies with other people besides him, citing “You not my beauty, not my property”. All that he asks for in the relationship is transparency and honesty. For them communication and trust is vitally important. They understand that love and sex can be separate. This makes the bond they have for one another strong. For love is patient and understanding. Love is practicality and reason. Love is not vain and shallow. It is not narcissistic entitlements and pride. Love operates at a positive wavelength. It calibrates at a high conscious level. Love is the default language of the world. Love is life.
Maybe there’s wisdom in monogamy for it creates a world of order in your life. Monogamy is stable and often reliable. It fosters closer relations in the family. Monogamy is warm, stable and secure. It makes life meaningful for we can raise our children and our grandchildren and die gracefully. Monogamy is consistent and always there for you. At least that’s what it promises on paper. The salesman who’s selling us on the idea of marriage is a great one because we still go into marriage head first dispite the staggering divorce rates. The odds of a divorce are 1 in 2, that’s 50% – that means either you or a friend is getting a divorce. This is because of the unrealistic promises of romanticism. I can’t be your everything. I can’t fill the void in your heart or complete you. I am not your savior. We can’t unite love and animal sex in our relationship, we can do it for a while but don’t expect it to last forever. Reason being is that I am flawed. I am a human being and I have my days were I am not at my best. Sometimes my actions are repulsive, bad natured and suspect. I have deep rooted insecurities. I am a horrible person but I try my best to be presentable. I am repressed and I will exhibit undesirable behavior. I am a mess and untidy. Sometimes I will get defensive and angry. I am narcissistic. I have a big ego. I am imperfect. I am a born sinner. With that said, let’s create a love that will be accomodative and sustaining for someone like me. I don’t believe in forever because I live in a vacuum of time and space. So let’s create something practical and usable. What is the reason of our union? Is it for protection and wealth, is it for a partnership, is it for cohabitation, is it to start and raise a family, is it the sex, is it because you love me and want to be with me forever and ever? Let’s discuss this and put it in the world. Let’s discuss how we can make provisions for our inadequacies. Let’s come to an agreement that will suit me and you. Let’s make our love objective and with a criteria, it will help regulate our actions and we will never take each other for granted.
In his comedy special, comedian Kevin Hart explores the difference between new relationships and relationships that have gone the long mile. He explains that he hates new relationships because everything is fake and we are in a continual process to impress our partner. He states that we are willing to do anything to prove we are the right person, that we regulate our impulses and emotions, that we are overly generous with everything including sharing food off our plates on our dates – despite the fact that we don’t like sharing food. He contrasts this with old relationships, where the couple are highly familiar with each other. He makes a joke stating that if that couple went inside a shop and the one person came out with snacks and the other one came out with Juice and the one with the snacks asked the one with the juice for a sip, the person with the juice would be outraged. That he wouldn’t share his juice and it would be the topic of the whole day. Mileage on relationships reveals people’s true nature and character is the aim of this joke. Urban Poet Kanye West, explores this on songs “Paranoid” and “RoboCop” in the awesome 2008 album “808’s and Heartbreaks”. Kanye talks about a girl who completely changes on her, she’s irrational, lacks trust and overly paranoid. This paranoia creates in her a RoboCop, whose constantly surveiling Kanye hoping to get evidence. The idea here is that the romantics version of love can make you crazy. Simply because it’s built on possession, ownership and entitlement to a person. The romantics love is the same as slave trading. It is a demon that needs to be exorcised from culture. We need a new kind of love. One that is intelligent, practical, reasonable and life affirming. Generally, there are 3 stages of love. First is the infatuation stage, where everything about our love object is perfect. We just can’t get enough of that person. The relationship is new and burning with desire. Sex is a constant and we just can’t keep our hands of each other. The duration of this stage is anywhere between a year to 3 years. Then we have the second stage. In this phase, the couple start the process of knowing each other. This stage is the fruit of the infatuation phase.
It is the most rewarding phase as it fosters closer relations. It fosters intimacy and spirituality. It is liberating. It is fulfilling. The 3rd stage is the accumulation of the 1st and 2nd phases. It is the limit. A place where everything dies. This is because everything has been established. Behaviors are now habits and novelty ceases to exist. You know everything about your partner and she knows everything about you. It can even be said that she knows you better than you know yourself. This is the natural order of all relationships. Unless, you can bring it back to the first step (infatuation phase) it will die. Hence, redefining yourself and creating relationship goals is key. It will keep the fire burning and enhance new qualities you didn’t know existed in you. It will generate a sense of wonder in the relationship. It will make your partner fall in love with you all over again. It will keep your relationship youthful and exciting. Relationship goals are key because at this point in the relationship you are one, a unit, a pair and as such a third entity has been created. This third entity is the love you have for each other and it has to grow, it has to self-realize. This third entity is a energy that needs to grow and expand. It needs fuel like how your body needs food. It needs love and support. It needs continual growth. Relationship goals or mutual goals are what will propel the relationship forward. It will refresh things in the relationship. It will refresh the stages or phases in the relationship. This is because goals require specialized focus and attention. It activates traits and talents you didn’t know existed in you. Goals are challenging and hard. Goals require a lot of work. This is what will keep your relationship flourishing.
Alternatively, we could just have a 5 year lease on love and marriage. Nothing in life is certain, especially the union of two individuals. This is because of cultural differences and our perceptions of the world. Our history and past makes us distinct from one another. We have different intentions and plans. Life is a process that keeps unfolding and developing. Evolution is constantly evolving and expanding. Change is eminent. Marriage as forever is a hoax like the moonlandings. We need to be able to adapt to new environments and ultimately conquer only to move on to newer pastures. A 5 year lease on marriage is active, it is progressive and will provide different perspectives. A 5 year lease on relationships and marriage provides us with freedom to live life on our terms. We will never take our partners for granted. Our lives will be filled with novelty and we will grow and become all that we can be. But maybe the state won’t allow that, to that I propose empathy and understanding for our partners. I propose patience and a light view of the world. I propose we treat our partners like we do our children. This is because, we are all children at heart. Maybe we forgot that we are children because the world is so harsh and doesn’t condone childish behaviors. The word “childish” has become an insult, a smear campaign on one’s character and conduct, a terrible disaster. However, it doesn’t have to be that way. Consider for a minute how we treat our children. We are more emphatic, we are understanding and we are patient with them. This comes from the fact they are young, small, vulnerable and don’t know any better. We think it’s cute when they make blunders and we laugh. We are gentle. We are considerate and love them unconditionally. That is something we must adopt in our relationships. We should treat our partners like children. They are children at heart and also don’t know any better, in fact no one does. We are all lost in need of guidance, love and assurance. We should adopt the the action of giving and not expecting anything from our partners. Give with a pure heart. Give everything you have. This action will give longevity in the relationships in your life. You will be a better human being because you will be more empathic. People will seek refuge in your hands. If you treat your partner and the people all around you like children, you will see the light side of life and will laugh when life issues you a challenge. You will love yourself more. You will be strong and affirmed.
In 1998, critically acclaimed artist, the queen Lauryn Hill released an album titled “The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill”, it was lauded by critics and won Album of the year at the grammys. The album explores the subject of love. It is the most important music album ever created and is what love sounds likes. It covers, self-love, self-worth, self-identity, romantic love, family love, destiny, law of attraction, self-actualization, self-realization, ambition, Taoism, the human spirit or soul and happiness. It is an amazing album, unrivaled in any genre of music. The album is enlightened. It is an album that has the capability of changing your life in just one listen. It is an album that calibrated at an high energy level. It is natural and free. To add to the texture of the album, Lauryn Hill got kids to talk and discuss the subject of love. These kids give their insights on what they think love is – on what love means to them. That makes the album sound so special. It is heart-warming. You will never find a better album on love than this one, I promise you – it’s impossible. I encourage you to take a listen.
There’s a beauty in infatuations, they color in the world, they have the ability to put you in a dream-like trance, they can make you fly, they can make you touch the sky and they have the promise of making all of your dreams come true. What is it about love that makes people lose their minds? Is it oxytocin, the love chemical that fosters closer relations with people? Human beings are social beings by trait and we need validation of some sort to survive, to live, to thrive. Love is on the first level on the Maslow hierachy of needs. Then again, love also induces cordizol, the stress hormone for it can leave us anxious, stressed and utterly mortified. Which one is it? You know we get butterflies in our stomachs when we are in love. It sounds like a part of speech but it isn’t, you can literally feel them flapping their wings and flying all about in your stomach. It is a feeling that can make a statue out of you, one that mould you into a perfect sculpture or the perfect snowman because it makes you freeze. It is a wonderful, yet terrifying thing. Infatuations, love can make you feel vulnerable like a big bullseye sign in a dart competition, the soft spot, the flank – it has the capability of taking off your panties and laying you down, down into a deep abyss of apathy and helplessness. So what do you do? Do you sit on the sidelines or do you play ball? Do you tell the one that you love, your crush that you love her and that you can’t live without her?
Infatuations are a product of the mind. They are unconscious features that are repressed within you, your mind. A sort of transference and projection. The spirit or soul is boundless, it has no restrictions or demarcations, however society deems to assign it a role, a gender based on the reproductive organs of the body. So, we indoctrinate the soul into the customs of this specific gender. The other half of the soul we repress, relegate and surpress in the realm of the unconscious. By nature, the human soul is bisexuel. When we grow up, we subconsciously take and adopt desirable qualities or features from the parent inverse our gender. Meaning, that a boy is more likely to marry a girl who has the qualities of her mother and likewise with the girl. It is a subconscious phenomena and we do this because they feel familiar. Sigmund Freud, the godfather of psychology calls this the “Oedipus complex”. He states that the little boy is jealous of his father and wishes to possess his mother but is at the same time frightened of this rival and of castration as a punishment for his incestuous feelings toward the mother but nonetheless, he wishes death onto his father. I think it’s a bit extreme but it deserves a mention. It would also explain why sons are much closer to their mothers and why daughters are far more closer to their fathers. It could also be a Ying-yang thing. I like Carl Jung’s take on this with his work on the Anima and Animus. Carl Jung states that the Anima is the female side of the male that is repressed. And the Animus is the male side of the female that is repressed. According to this, we are likely to choose a partner based on our Anima and our Animus. Of course, parents play a big role in this decision because from a young age, as children that’s where they get their education. The individual bears within himself all kinds of opinions and feelings from his parents and ancestors, but which he believes to be his own. Nietzsche states; In the son becomes conviction what in the father was a lie. Not only fathers, but mothers also determine the conduct of the individual. Every person carries within a picture of women which he acquired from his mother. From this picture, he will be determined to respect or despise women or be indifferent toward them.
Based on this telling evidence, you are crazy, you are not normal. It’s all in your mind. You are suffering from a projection that is making you see things that are not there. You are implanting characteristics and traits to a receiver that is bound to reject them. Psychology tells us that man projects onto woman one of several ready-made pictures that he carries within him; the picture of the mere sexual object, of the femme fatal, of the muse, the virgin-mother, those belonging to what Jung latter called archetypes. The same goes for woman but with different archetypes like the woman to save him and the worshiping woman among others. You think she’s perfect because you don’t know anything about her. You know what your mind is telling you about her and your mind draws data from occurances that transpired or what feels familiar, safe or homely. They say that love is blind and that’s true because when you are in love, you are focused, your brain induces chemicals, your physiology reacts and your subconscious mind fools you. Thus being infatuated with a person is the biggest compliment you can pay. The conscious mind has very little control instead your shadow assumes control. Carl Jung describes the shadow as “The sum of those personal characteristics that the individual wishes to hide from others and from himself.” The shadow lurks in the subconscious and is operant when the conscious mind has lost all sight of reality. This makes sense because when you are infatuated with someone, all you do is think about them. You bill them up to more than they actually are. You see no imperfections and frailties, your reasoning capabilities are out of touch and you think they are the most wonderful person in the world! And maybe they are because truth is a subjective concept and you, well you are crazy but it’s alright.
Tell your crush you love them. This is a test, this is about you. By doing this, it will reveal things you didn’t know about yourself. It is an act that will make you courageous. It will empower you because this comes from your lens, your reality, your map of experience. It is personal and subjective and it will liberate your soul. You crush possess traits and characteristics that you love on a subconscious level, it is like holding a mirror to your soul. Take advantage of it, that’s the universal, God or whatever you believe in telling you to go for it – it is a map of experience that is specifically designed for you. It is an experience, a moment in this vast and expanding universe to know something of substance and value about yourself, your history and even your ancestry line. It is an opportunity to free apathy from your life. It is an opportunity to follow your dreams. It doesn’t matter how you do it, do what comes natural to you, do it so you maximize your returns. Write a poem, sing a song get your creative juices running. Be encouraged, be inspired – this is a big moment in your life. Sure, he/she might reject you and rightfully so because like we covered you are crazy but so is everyone else. This important feat is not about the response you’ll get, it’s about personal growth and self-gratification. It is about understanding of the self. Love is difficult, complicated, unreliable and unstable and you took a risk, you took a chance! Who knows maybe in a perfect world, the person of your affection will return your love. Maybe your life will be perfect. Isn’t it a chance you should take?
I believe Lira’s Feel Good is one of the greatest albums of all time. It has such a high energy level. It sounds like heaven and I mean that in a literal sense. It is an enlightened album that covers sophisticated subjects, subjects that calibrate at a high conscious level, subjects like; love, gratitude, self-realization, happiness and freewill. It explores the psychology of a young, bright woman who is optimistic about the world. She sees the world through the eyes of a child and sees novelty in everything. A woman who is so intelligent and knows her worth. She has such a strong, confident personality that it is contagious. It spreads through the listeners ears, hearts and finally life through melodious choruses and striking chords. It is the ultimate feel good album. On “Typical” she is dismissive of girls trying to get to her man, stating that “his not into the the typical”. This of course communicates that she is not “typical”, she hints at possessing something extra, something that makes her irresistible. She’s so confident in her self that she states “it doesn’t matter what you do, he still remains my baby love.” In this song, she understands her worth and communicates to the listener on a subtle level that we all have something about ourselves that is desirable and that we should love ourselves and not be concerned by the attributes of other people. This song is about self-love and appreciation because no one views themselves as “Typical”. It is a song brimming with confidence. It is assured and has plenty of attitude. Another song with attitude that shows self-worth and understanding is “Ixesha”, quite simply the chorus translates to “Stop wasting my time”, this eludes to a woman who has things to do. “Dance of life” is more celebratory, it literally sounds like a dance and this is enforced by the striking chords of the piano. The song is upbeat, festive and positive. It references dance styles like “the cha-cha” and the slow-dance. The whole song is a metaphor celebrating the life shared by Lira and her partner and she explains that life is like a ball in which they have to keep moving and dancing, implementing new and different styles at times. Life is fun and beautiful and she is just so happy and blessed that he is besides her dancing in the game of life. The song is bursting with imagination, originality and creativity – listening to it is pure bliss. “Ngiyazifela” explores the love he has for his lover. It’s not infatuation or romanticism. The love she has for him is pure and heart-warming. She states that she is proud and will patiently wait for him. That she loves him and wants to be with him forever. In the chorus she states that she can’t help loving him. That her love is automatic and natural. Her voice sounds sincere and honest. Her lyrics are like a love letter or a poem and she gives all of herself by delivering an amazing highnote that highlights that she would do anything for him. The song is an expression of love and it sounds so beautiful. On “Crush” she talks about someone she is smitten by. He is the object of her desire. He is the image of perfection and he just drives her crazy. The man is too good to be true and she is locked in a trance. She doesn’t know what to do. She wants to talk to him but she is scared to do so. She doesn’t want him to ignore her, she wants to be seen. For the first time in the album she questions herself and displays her insecurities, questioning “Do I even stand a change?” This results in apathy and she is left to just contemplate about him. The song ends in her stating that “his such a beautiful stranger”. “Crush” is descriptive and will leave you reminiscing. The song is nostalgic and golden. The type of song that has the ability to make your soul dance. “Twisted” is a more soulful song. It is intimate and thoughtful. It explores Liras feelings at depth about the relationship she is in. It is a reflective song and this is reflected by the horns and Lira senerading us. The song is mature like good wine. On “Ngiyabonga”, Lira expresses her gratitude to her family and friends. She is grateful for the gift of life and where she is in life. She is open and expressive. The song is joyous, festive and celebratory. On “Iris” she explores choices and being whatever you want to be. She covers freewill, an inner scorecard and an inner campus. The song sounds like liberation. It sounds like it’s setting is in nature with the trees and animals roaming around. The acoustic guitar solo is like a painting of nature with its mountains and lake. She pleads to the listener “You don’t have to be what people say”. “Iris” is about individuality and the process of self-realization. In the land of Iris is an ideal we should all aspire to be. This is my favorite song in the album. “Dumisa” is another song about gratitude. The song is minimalistic and contains mainly an acoustic guitar in its background while Lira takes center stage and serenades the listener. It is a soulful and harmonic song. “Feel it in me” is about intuition and an inner voice that we all have. It is about the will to life that pushes and propels you forward. It is a genetic code, a kind of destiny, the universe and even the God in you. The song states that everything is in you, that you are the source of everything in your life. The song is upbeat and vibrant. It contains drums that steal the show to turn it to a Fiesta. The song feels alive, youthful and celebratory. “Yeah, yeah, yeah” is a beautiful song dedicated to her mother. It is smooth and light with the only instrument being an organ or piano of somesort. It contains melodies that complimentary to the texture of the song. Lira is thankful to her mother for everything; the lessons, the sacrifices and the unconditional love, this highlights a recurring theme in the album – gratitude. The last song “Change the world” is highly optimistic and discusses how me and you can change the world. It is ambitious and Lira aims to solve the biggest problems in the world. She implores us to change individually so we can alter the world collectively. She states that if we can live as one nation then we change the world. By “live” she states love because it is it that unites. Love is patient, love is kind and by practicing love in our lives, we have a chance to change the world. The eternal optimist, something she is certain we can achieve. In the main theme of the album is choice and love. Lira states that we have a choice to want to be happy. The first song “Feel Good” is about a choice to lead a life that is meaningful. It is about saying yes to life in its totality, to embracing it and living it in a way that makes people grateful of your existence. The album is a great example of reason and pure unadulterated love. The album is a mirror of life, it embodies nature and the idea of life striving to be more. The album is free and natural. It is an album that can resonate with anyone because it is so philosophical in its lessons. The aim of philosophy is to teach and “Feel Good” teaches one how to live a fulfilled life; a life of gratitude and love. This is such a great album and I salute Lerato and her team for bringing this to the world. Lerato because I want to be closer to her, to her spirit. She is such an amazing artist, a brilliant creative who created one of the masterclasses of the ages.
I think an erection is the best compliment you can pay someone. For it communicates, you excite me, I love you, you drive me crazy! It cannot be hidden, it is phallic. The moment when psychology and physiology are perfectly aligned. It is too awesome. I liken an erection to an infatuation, they are similar in a lot of ways. Firstly, they are a product of the mind and they both need the mind to fill in the blank spaces. Infatuations are a strong desire for someone and well the same criteria is met for an erection. They are both passionate and mystical in the realm of the universe. An infatuation is love, it is a projection, and it is seductive. Popular culture as has attached a sinister connotation to the word seduction and it’s completely misleading. Seduction is arousal, seduction is sexy, seduction playful energy, seduction is stimulation for the mind, it is indirect and unguarded, it is filling in the blank lines, it is reading between the lines, it is subtle and it is for the imaginative. When you are infatuated with someone, all you do is think about that particular person. You make them bigger than they actually are. You project all your dreams and hopes onto that person. That person becomes the best thing that has ever happened to you. When you are infatuated, you become ultra-attentive to that person, you are focused, motivated to find out what makes her tick. The revelations you get are ground-breaking and you want to internalize them hoping that it will bring you closer to her spirit, her energy. You become trapped in a world where she is the elusive woman of perfection and that further seduces you making her a god-like figure. Detached from reality you fail to see the disappointing truth. Infatuations bring light to this dark world.
Human beings have this weird ritual they do when they are in love. They call it kissing and it is strange and so risky. What they do is to lean forward towards one another making their lips touch and often exchange saliva in the process. It is a form of embracing one another. What this ritual is about is acceptance. Meaning, I am letting you invade my space and be all up in my face because I accept you and trust you. It fosters closer relations. It is effective because it is consensual. It sparks neural circuitry in the mind thus inducing the feel good substance in the brain known as dopamine. This process makes human beings feel closer. It also excites the physiology of the participants. When the physiology of the two participates is excited and aroused, it often leads to coitus. Coitus or sexual intercourse is a release – the moment when your impulses take over and you lose control, this is trigged by the amygdala. However, sex has an interesting complex namely the human dilemma whereby we often separate life in two realms – mind and body. We see the two entities (mind and body) as separate and we desperately want to see them as one. Sex without empathy negates the personality (mind) and objectifies the body. Lovemaking is, at its best an act of mutual empathy, at its worst it lacks any such emotional mutuality. Sex without empathy is not sexy, it is not seductive, it becomes mechanical and an outlet vent out your frustrations of the world – and it shouldn’t be because it is a mutual undertaking. One of the things I love about infatuations is that you want to please the partner you are infatuated by and as such you will pull off all the stops to make the activity worthwhile.
Sex can be a complicated endeavor to enter into. Namely because you want the activity to be enjoyable for the parties involved. Most of the time, you can write off the activity as a success if both parties reached orgasms. It is a tricky thing for men to impart to their female counterparts. For men, penetration into the vagina will most of the time do. However, penetration for women is often not enough. This is because of their neural circuitry. By trait women and men are different. This is noted in the ways boys and girls play when they are young. Boys are threatened by anything that might challenge their independence so they play in big numbers and their insistent is on competition. While girls by contrast are more threatened by a rupture in their relationships so they play in small groups with their insistence on quality and thoroughness. As such, women often need special attention to reach orgasm. Sigmund Freud once stated that penetration was enough to give a woman an orgasm but that’s such a manly answer isn’t it? I mean it works for us, surely it will work for them. Sometimes, it happens but it is not the most effective way to do it. To give a woman an orgasm, you need imagination – to play in the realm of the mind. After a long seduction process in which gratification was delayed and the mind was stimulated sure, an orgasm through penetration is likely but still not a 100 percent. Cunnilingus is the best way to do it. I will explain.
From a young age, girls are exposed to their own mortality. This happens when stages like menopause begin. It is a scary and confusing dilemma for a young girl, some are embarrassed. However, something happens subconsciously looking at their own mortality they draw-in into themselves, they train themselves to look at the world with a naked eye, they become more emotionally attuned, they can distinguish what’s right from wrong, they become grounded and they plan better – they become conscious, while by contrast boys are playing Grand Theft Auto and not taking anything seriously. It is the fundamental difference between boys and girls. Cunnilingus like the act of kissing is acceptance but acceptance multiplied to a hundred. When she allows you to go down on her, it communicates trust with her body. She’s vulnerable, naked and completely at your mercy. She’s trusting you with her insecurities. You have a complete grip over her mind. Cunnilingus is mind magic, it is mind witchcraft, it is a spell for the mind – a trance, it’s unwritten, it’s abstract, it’s seductive, it’s metaphysical and out of this world! When you are engaged in Cunnilingus, there’s attention, there’s focus and the will to do it right. Cunnilingus serves underlying desires and fantasies. Cunnilingus will give her an orgasm every time.
The danger about infatuations is real life but then again erections become flaccid – nothing lasts forever. The positive news is that we could refresh, a second erection is a real possibility. Infatuations give us a platform to build something substantial. They are passionate, impulsive, subjective, chaotic and beautiful. For if we can move from the initial infatuation stage to compassion and understanding we will have a concreate relationship and we will have a chance to recreate that infatuation stage since it is a product of the mind. We can create an infatuation loop that will be eternal. By withholding sex and keeping our clothes on whilst remaining affectionate with another, touching, kissing and “dry-humping”. Another thing we could is send nude pictures to one another not too explicit though we have to leave much to the imagination of the brain so it could fill in the blank spaces like a crossword puzzle. Maybe instead of penetration, Fellatio, that will leave every man in the face of this earth grateful! Maybe I wanted you for your body at first but you can show me a different dimension, a different perspective, a different angle that will enable my mind to lust over – to obsess and think about when I am alone. We could drive each other crazy all over again. We could be reborn and transformed. Infatuations are the most beautiful things in the world because they point out something about you – something transformative! In this age of romanticism that should be the first thing that is ticked off from your box. Infatuations are a spark, that juice, that light that has the ability to illuminate your world. An infatuation is love at a very basic level – that’s when you know you are in love when you are infatuated with someone. Reciprocation is a different thing, to love someone who loves you back is rare but luckily we have seduction! Anyone and everyone is immune to seduction with time. Concentrate your efforts to the one you are infatuated by!
antakalipa 