I am repressed. My subconscious thoughts are dictating my life. Of course, this is about a woman. The feminine energy rules the world because it is fundamental, it’s energy conceives and creates. The masculine energy can of course excert itself but I feel it’s in vain because behind every great man is a woman. Man has an unconscious urge to please woman. This energy makes man greater. It is life defining. Man is nothing without woman. This is illustrated on the Bible with the tale of Adam and Eve. Eve gives Adam the apple so that he can be conscious, how beautiful is that? How beautiful is woman? You know a creator exists because woman exists, what a gift for man! Damn! I love girls, girls, girls, girls, girls, girls I do adore! Thank you Jigga, for bringing that into the world. But I also understand why women were suppressed for so long. I understand why they didn’t have rights. I understand why their roles were reduced to housewife. Imagine a woman who understands her self-worth, one who is intelligent, opinionated and has dreams, dreams she will one day conquer. Damn! I think I am erect. Don’t you think that’s dangerous? Don’t you think that’s powerful? Women already run the world unconsciously and if you give them tools and resources they will take over the universe. And so I understand the fear eminating from the masculine point of view. How could I not? I am masculine and well feminine is powerful. Feminine is dangerous. It is chaotic like abstract art on a canvas. It is beautiful. Feminine energy defines the world, it gives it meaning and substance. Feminine energy makes life worthwhile. And so I am in this boat ruminating about this feminine species that drives me absolutely crazy. She is the manifestation of my wildest dreams. Damn! She is impressive. Hey Kanye, congratulations on your work with “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” it is an absolute classic. What happened there? My goodness, you truly are a genius, a creative of the highest order. Better than Steve Jobs, wait can I say that? Okay, let me rather say in my top 5 with Steve Jobs. But I digress. My mind takes me places sometimes and I can’t understand the flights of my thoughts but everything eventually connects. I was talking about this girl who drives me wild. I am planning on being sexual so brace yourself.
I don’t want to bore anyone with the details of her life so I will start with the day where she illuminated the world for me. Of course she was always hot and impressive. But on this day I was thinking about her. I had premeditated motives. I wanted her. I wanted her body. I wanted to bring her to my room and have my way with her. It wasn’t the first time I had these thoughts about her. Thoughts of absolute possession. Thoughts of pleasing her with a cascade of pleasure. All I could visualize was her perfect body, her natural perfect boobs that have so much detail in them, I am talking veins and succulent nipples. All I could think about was descending to her lotus flower bomb! Great work Wale. All I could think about was pleasing her, making her scream with delight, making her orgasm like fireworks in the sky, all I could think of was fulfilling her in every way. She haunted my conscious reality. All I could smell was her, all I could see were her lips and kissing her would give me so much pleasure. Kissing all of her being, kissing her lips, her neck, her shoulders, her boobs, her stomach, her thighs and her lotus flower bomb! Explosive we would be in bed. Missionary is good but I’ve got variety, there isn’t any style that we wouldn’t explore, I am talking Kama Sutra and the art of eroticism. I had so much imagination and she stared in every production. She was the girl I wanted desperately. I wanted to be in her, to penetrate her. Damn! What I would do to have a night with her. Permission and seduction is such a bore. I understand the impulse of the rapist. He won’t wait for all of that and I respect that. When I saw her that day the top of my head nearly fell on the ground. It was like the Universe was playing a trick on me. My mind couldn’t comprehend her level of hotness. Her level of hotness was on steroids, the scale was tipped, her energy had spikes, she was incredible! I am talking make-up, hair, apparel EVERYTHING! She has natural hair and well, I am a sucker for natural hair. It is a deadly weakness that leaves me on my knees drooling. Natural hair is the most beautiful thing on a woman especially if it’s well taken care off. On this day she wore a black dress, it reached before her knees. It complimented all her body features. She was incredible! All I could see was her yellow thighs. Damn! All those premeditated thoughts came rushing in like a packed train. I don’t know why the Universe sometimes does this to me, but okay, I accept and I am grateful for the experience. I was at the mercy of her, I was weak and there was nothing I could do. Her energy was too strong for me and my subconscious mind was in control, controlled by the unconscious mind driven by the feminine energy, I was bewitched, under a trance and at that moment there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her including wrapping the world and giving it to her, and because I am not a rapist, I am writing this instead.
I want to live the good life because what’s the use of having a mediocre existence in a place where we will all perish? There is no re-run, no second life like Pacman, no heaven as promised, just nothing. A cold world where nobody cares about me, where nobody loves me. Why settle to be on the podium when you can be a winner? I want to be a multi-billionaire and then give it all away like my hero, my god Mr. Warren Buffet. I want to eat the best food and live in the best houses. I want the best personal trainer because health is true wealth. I want an overpaid nanny whose highly-qualified to look after my children. Not because I don’t want to raise them myself because I do, this is about allocating resources and focused attention, it is about buying time and ensuring my time is utilized to the maximum. I will be there for my children every step of the way, I will be there in all the important moments of their life, I will be a great dad. I will teach them about business, money and creating intergenerational wealth. I want to travel the world and expose myself to different cultures. I want to learn a foreign language. I want to learn German, Spanish and Chinese. I want to watch “El Classico” at the Camp Nou and the Santiago Bernabou. I want that blend of Mercedes-Benz and Maybach. I want a BMW so I can do doughnuts. I want quality pussy, the best pussy in the world! I want to master the piano. I want to win the PSL. I want to do everything I can humanly do. I want to be the best that I can be. Because what’s the use of doing average, of being average? How can I head for mediocrity knowing that one day I will succumb to my mortal decaying body? Knowing that one day my bones will fail to keep me up. Knowing that my organs will give up on me. Knowing that my youth is not eternal. Knowing that I’ll be gone someday and nobody will remember me or what I did for the world. Knowing that this life is meaningless. How can I consciously strive for mediocrity? What will I be saving myself for? Why not fight with everything I have to achieve this? Why not delay gratification for this ideal? Why not be a fool for a while for this vision? Forget it, I am never settling, not in this lifetime. I’d rather be a loser because you don’t understand. It simply doesn’t make sense for me and I am a reasonable man, a practical man. I am not setting up myself for being something less than I couldp be. I didn’t invest 200 hours of my life reading Proust to work in retail. With all the respect in the world, I would rather die, I welcome death, I am not afraid of death. I am also not growing up too, forget it! I am a grown ass child. I will remain a child at heart until death comes calling. Maybe my actions don’t make sense now, but they will, soon the world will understand my greatness even though it will be temporary in the scope of time. I am leaving a mark in this Universe or I am going to die trying. My impact will be like smoke, it will linger around for a while before it completely subsides. These are not grandiose thoughts or the ego talking, it is my nature, it is what it is. I am going to do everything I want, nothing is going to stop me, stopping me is an impossible task! Time will prove me right.
Late last year I met a girl that I used to know in my teenage years at a social event. Growing up we had a thing. We shared a mutual attraction towards one another. We hadn’t seen each other for a while. She was hot. The term “beautiful” refers to facial features. For society beauty is symmetrical features in the right proportion. For example, your eyes need to be at the right place and must have the right size. This goes for your mouth, ears and forehead too. If any of these things are disproportionate or asymmetrical, you run the risk of being “ugly” in the eyes of the world. Skin color, or scars or birth marks don’t really matter. Symmetrical features at the right proportion is all that beauty is. The term “hot” talks about attributes from the neck down. Like a great ass and boobs. Also a good physiue. Hot is just contemporary jargon for “fuckable”. Now, this girl was beautiful and hot. She had everything, she was everything. She has a ass that is just out of this world. It’s not fake ass too, it’s natural, God given; has the right ass to thigh ratio. Oh, you just have to believe me, it’s the greatest ass in the world! This girl is hot like Mercury, the first planet from the sun. She’s easily in my top 5. Now at this social event, I saw here and I didn’t immediately acknowledge her, I took my time, ignored her, I was aloof. She was at her best in terms of apperel and make-up. Every guy in the room wanted her. You could taste the thirst. I had to be intelligent, indirection was my best shot. I moved a couple of chess pieces and later on, I had won. She was talking to me, her focus was on me. I had the envy of guys in that social gathering. Some guys never stopped trying, a trait I admired. I would give the gents space so they tried out their magic but she recoiled and jump straight at me. It was unbelievable! I always approach my day with the assumption that I am going to win. But not like this. Today’s win was like Liverpool winning the league. She wanted to go home with me but I had to cool things down a bit. I told her “Let’s enjoy this moment, let’s enjoy today. Tomorrow is another day.” She agreed and the rest of the night was filled with kisses and caresses. She was so into me, it was like she had taken love heroine and to be fair I was too. However, there was only one problem, I was broke. I couldn’t let her see that. And so at the end of the night I took her number and never called her again. It was better that way. Today after months, I saw her and immediately thought about the skits on Kanye Wests “Late Registration”. “We, broke, broke, broke, broke, flat broke.” I thought about that skit before “Drive Slow” and it said something like we will leave the girl to go with the guy who has a car, because we can’t afford gas, hoes or anything for that matter. Ah Kanye, you captured something so real in those skits, that album. You have always been in my life Kanye, thank you. Yes, I will cry myself to sleep today but I believe I made the right decision. The most important thing is that I keep growing. Kanye West also suffered the pain of not getting hoes in his 20’s and today his a Billionaire, I am in great company. Sure, I am consoling myself but the decision to not be in contact with her was a conscious one. I will get my chance, I know it. The world is mine for the taking, what is needed is just time and patience. Time will prove me right.
I change my mind, I was stupid, I was impulsive, I am an idiot and I apologize. I have to retract my earlier statement. “The Irishman” is not my favorite movie, in fact I don’t have a favorite movie. You changed things for me. Your excellence, your gift, your creativity, your longevity, your passion, your movies. I am only a human being and I can’t resist the urge to compare, but you, your movies, they confuse me so much. I don’t know which is better. I use to think “Casino” was my favorite movie. Sharon Stone as Ginger was inspiring. I truly loved her performance. She taught me a lot about life. I will never forget her. Joe Persci and Robert De Niro were of course excellent so there’s no need to make a comment there. Robert De Niro was one of my favorite actors but now I don’t have any. That goes for you too DiCaprio, you mean nothing to me now. Things changed in 2013 when “The Wolf Of Wall Street” came out. I was obsessed with it. I will never forget that conversation between Mark Henna and Jordon Belfort. It shattered reality for me. It was like realizing that the moon landings were faked, it was awesome! I used to watch it every year on my birthday, it was a ritual of mine. I love how you can teach me about life sir. “The Wolf of Wall Street” was amazing! It was quite an experience, it was grand, provocative, truthful and fearless. Critics claimed that it perpetuated a lot of morally unacceptable behavior but they are wrong! That’s what greed does to a human being. You depicted the greed beautifully. I love how you made me identify with Jordon Belfort. I wanted to be him, I felt like him and then you took everything from me; the hot blonde, the kids, the expensive piece of real estate, the money and my profession. The tragedy! Oh Mr. Scorsese, only you can make me feel that way. I wish I could relive the experience of watching that movie again. It was a once in a lifetime movie. At least that’s what I thought, until I watched “Silence”, 3 years later and I was blown away! I loved “Silence”. It was so challenging. It covered the subjects of religion and morality. Wow, it is a powerful movie. I thought that was your best movie. But then fast forward 3 years later and you release “The Irishman”. Damn! You bring in Robert De Niro, Joe Persci and Al Pacino. You explore powerful subjects like our impending old age and death. That’s not all, you also cover love, loyalty and the mafia. That movie really touched me. It opened up the world for me. I learned a lot. Truly speaking it was the greatest movie that I had ever seen. Better than “The Godfather” trilogy, Scarface and Tarantino’s epic Inglorious Basterds. It was a big omission to concede on my side, it was hard. However, “The Irishman” deserved my number one spot. With that I was done, surely no movie is better than “The Irishman”. I proceeded with watching your other movies. I watched “The Last Temptation of Christ”, “Shutter Island” “Bringing out the Dead”, “The Color of Money”, “After Hours” “The Departed”, “Taxi Driver”, “The Aviator”, “Raging Bull”, “The King of Comedy” and “The Gangs of New York”. I was back to square one. I thought they were all legendary movies. I was confused, perplexed, “The Irishman” was no longer my favorite. I didn’t know which movie was my favorite. And so Mr. Scorsese, I would like to make things right. I don’t have a favorite anything in the world anymore. I don’t have a favorite actor. I don’t have a favorite director. I don’t identify with anything. I am a spectator now. I am neutral. I am a fence sitter. I live life without attachments. I will never judge and compare art ever again in my life! I will only enjoy, appreciate and applaud. This extends to all affairs in my life. I am now truly open-minded. I look forward to seeing more of your films and I thank you for what you have done for film. God bless.
I don’t change because you had a bad day, a bad week, a bad month, a bad year or a bad life. No, that’s not how it works. I was brilliant in the past, I am brilliant in the present and I will continue being brilliant in the future. It’s a constant variable, I am the best, I never change. So thank you for your advice that I didn’t need, I hope it made you better. I hope it validated your existence and made you feel important. Although I have to admit it had no impact on me. Your thoughts and feelings about me are your business. They don’t define who I am. You lead a life of expediency and instant gratification, I don’t expect you to understand vision and the importance of living a meaningful life. In fact you are abstract, invisible, lack space and matter when it comes to my life and decisions. You are insignificant. It’s too late for your negative utterances and your attempts to bring me down. I know who I am. I know my worth. I am a leader. I am an exceptional man so don’t compare me to ordinary men. I vibrate on a higher frequency, I make miracles happen, I walk on water, I am incredible, I am the greatest. I slither with the snakes in the grass and fly with the eagles in the sky. There’s nothing I can’t do and no prey I can’t get to. I am Goku, Mr. Autonomous Ultra Instinct, I am the hero. I am impressive, a God, I hold my own destiny in my hands. I am the big ticket, the type that doesn’t need validation from anyone. So love me or leave me alone, I am not going abbid by your attempts to control and restrict my life. Who do you think you are, the Coronavirus? Even that didn’t apply to me. I kept pushing. I kept winning. I am a star how could I not shine? Thank you for your words that fell on deaf ears. They meant absolutely nothing to me. When I need help I will look at the mirror. I still follow my inner inclinations and destiny. I will never betray my heart. I have a tidal wave of good that is coming to me. Time will prove me right.
Love yourself right now, at this moment, at this second. Love everything about yourself. Love your big eyes, your big ears, your big forehead, your small nose, your slanted small eyes, your big lips, your rectangular face, your large hands, your small feet, your fat ass and your small breats. Be content with everything you are. Be grateful to see the beauty life has in store. Be happy to attract happiness in your life. Make it a deliberate practice to be happy, to love yourself. The world mirrors and reflects our thoughts, so think positive thoughts to attract positive outcomes. Our thoughts are energies that become concrete things in the objective world. We are what we think about most of the time. You are responsible for everything that happens in your life, everyday, every time, 100% percent of the time. Everything is a consequence of what happens inside of you. Everything is within you. Zithande and the world will love you. Respect yourself. Treat yourself like loyalty, someone with pedigree and affluence to attract that in the world. Treat yourself like someone who matters. The answer is hardly out in the world. You are where you are in the world because of your choices. It’s your fault you never became what you always wanted. Zithande to control your self-image and to switch your paradigm. Zithande to increase your self-awareness. On a fundamental level we are all energies who inhibit a biological system. This biological system is the default, it is a given, hereditary from our long ancestry line that descends from primates. Our biological bodies are a product of the lottery of life. We don’t choose who we are, where we are born, our social class or who our families are. Love what you have. Embrace who you are, cherish your culture, beliefs and customs, be grateful for your current circumstance, be grateful for your friends and your family, be grateful for life. Make the best out of life. Forgive your parents, they don’t know any better, they are just like you. Understand that life is difficult and don’t waste your time and energy on things you can’t change. Feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, depression and stress are a waste of thoughts, time and energy. Plastic surgery or other techniques to modify or alter your body and facial features may promise a new start to your fabricated reality but it is an illusion, a deception because it doesn’t emanate from within. You will never find happiness, you will always be dissatisfied with what you have or who you are. True change happens from within, don’t look for solutions in the external world from problems brewing internally. Live in the present, forget the past and let the Universe deal with the future. Zithande, love your beautiful melanin skin or your bright, golden skin. Love your natural hair or that scar on your face. Love the frikkles on your face and that birth mark on your neck. Walk talk with your stiletto heels pushing that ironing board behind. Love your round figure or the fat in your body. Zithande, master yourself, search for answers from within, believe in yourself with blind faith, be positive to attract positive outcomes, flourish, dominate and be the best that you can be! Go out in the world expecting to win. The world is happening for you and not to you. Let the world bend to your rules. If someone doesn’t like you – tough, you are not changing for anyone. Be unwavering in your conduct and values. Zithande, love all of you without any conditions or contradictions. Anything you want in the world you can have if you just love and believe in yourself. Don’t wait for the world to confirm what you already know, Zithande. The world can’t tell you who you are or how to feel. Social media can’t dictate your worth. Never let anybody steal your shine. When your voice on the inside is more profound, clear and loud than the opinions outside, you have mastered your life.
Your dreams are too impractical. You can’t be a pilot, dear boy that’s not how the world works. Choose something else, something in line with your reality, something in line with your environment. How about an Uber driver? No, that’s too steep. Let’s try a taxi driver operating somebody’s 16 seater. You have to remember that you have owners. You are not free, no one is free, in fact dear boy, there is no such thing as freedom. It’s all made up like your dreams of flying airplanes. Someone needs to bring you down to earth, having your head above the clouds is only metaphoric like shooting stars in the sky. And well, you are no star. The truth is that you are limited like prepaid data. The truth is that you’ll never amount to much. The truth is that your are doomed like insects in a corner. There is no way of maneuvering this, you are playing a rigged game and the cards have been dealt to you since your inception. There is no way to change hands just play the cards you have been dealt as best as you can. Don’t mess up the order of the world, don’t anger your owners, just do as you are told and don’t be a hero. Lower your expectations dear boy you are nothing but a pawn in this chess game called life. No one cares about you or your dreams. But that’s not such a bad thing, strive to make your owners rich and you’ll do better than most people. Dear boy, just stay in your lane and you’ll be alright.
I think Pixar are trying to kill me. Before I delve into the main subject of this text. What was with “Toy Story 4” guys? What the hell was that? What sorcery was that? I mean I have been a “Toy Story” fan for literally my whole life and they have never made me cry. Sure the storylines are emotional as in the one exhibited on the third installment but I never cried, almost did but I didn’t. You guys assaulted me on the 4th installment. What a tear jerker. The emotion regulation techniques used in the movie are outstanding. The toys exhibited sensitivity and empathy they could regulate each others emotions. Everything is just so emotive, the film score just moves you, it is so powerful yet subtle and familiar. The movie just goes straight to your heart. I am fascinated by emotions. It’s like something hijacked my rational faculties. I had no control over my emotions, it just happened – what an experience! It wasn’t the first time you guys made me leak, you did it with “Ratatouille” too. You guys are truly something else. It’s amazing how you can create an experience like that. When my emotions get out of control like that it makes me think of how amazing the Universe is, how amazing life is. We are the Universe experiencing itself, all of life and nature is one – we all come from the same source. When you guys made me tear up with “Toy Story 4” I was one with the storyline, one with the experience you created, one with your mastery, one with your artistic expression and at that moment everything was perfect. I felt one with the Universe and hence there was nothing I could do. I was under your spell. What amazing art you guys created. I felt my facial expressions change, I felt my eyebrows going lower, I felt them coming closer, I felt the downward pull of my mouth, I felt my facial muscles contract and with that tears came out from my eyes. I felt my face wrinkle like a raisin. I did not do that consciously, it just happened, I was overwhelmed. It makes me think; emotions are not concealable, it is impossible to hide them, they always have a way of leaking out. The avenues of these leakages are found in body language, voice and facial expressions. It’s impossible to hide what you are truly feeling because it is an unconscious phenomena, it is the Universe communicating. Our emotions are spontaneous things that happen to us and we experience them. This means emotions are depended on socioeconomic factors like the environment, culture, family, friends and other external stimuli. This makes sense because the emotion fear is triggered by the amygdala – the flight or fight organ. Wow! It seems as though existence is a program. We don’t know what consciousness is or where it comes from and we can’t control our emotions. Because of this fact I don’t think we can fully understand our emotions, they are complicated. What a predicament. What a revelation! But I digress, thank you guys for the beautiful movie, I loved it! It was thoroughly entertaining, it was hilarious, it had imagination, the animation was brilliant, it was moving and heartfelt, it was emotive, it was beautiful. It was interesting to see; children begin to regulate emotions in the first few years of life. They find a favorite toy, blanket or stuffed animal that they use to self-soothe and regulate their emotions. We saw that with Bonnie and Forkkie, it gave me nostalgic memories, I couldn’t help but to reminisce. I am happy Gabby Gabbys dreams came true. What a noble thing to do, thanks Woody. I am excited at the prospect of a 5th installment. I hope I watch the 5th installment on the big screen with popcorn and a large coke. I watched “Toy Story 4” a year later and it was well worth the wait. To the Universe, thank you to the spirit of Steve Jobs. Thank you to John Lasseter and every creative who has ever made a contribution to Pixar. One day, I want to own stock in Pixar; I want a slice of heaven. You guys make my soul dance, you make me happy and you keep me young. Being childlike is a quality I never want to lose and you guys are aligned with that mission. I love everything that you guys do and I will be a fan until I die.
On the epic song by Jay-Z and Kanye West “No Church in the world”, Kanye West points out that love is ruined by monogamy. This is an interesting sentiment, one that disputes the validity of a marriage institute. Marriage is an institution created by the church to unite people who love each other romantically. It wasn’t always like this, to get married because of emotions and feelings would be considered an obscenity in the good old days of the past. People got married for reasons that were practical economically, they joined to unite fortunes and establish a powerbase. Marriage was a legal binding entity used to preserve wealth among families. It was not a measure of one’s love and dedication. However, going forward things changed with the entrance of the romantics. They affected and changed culture in a big way. Writers and poets started making an art form of this phenomena known as love. It was contagious and spread all over the world. De Beers located a diamond mine in South Africa but since diamonds had no value, they created value through the visuals of Hollywood movies and ads on billboards and newspapers – it was a frenzy, diamonds were everywhere, on printed media, billboards, television, in music and referenced by poets. Diamonds were made desirable. They were made valuable. They now demonstrated the love you had for your partner. Culture derived, formulated and concluded that your engagement ring should be worth at least 3 months of your paycheck. It was a madhouse and everyone was in the delirium. For their efforts, De Beers made riches and they continue to own the diamond market in the world. Their success is attributed to the romantic age. The romantic age contained an impractical people. Indoctrinated in the constitution of the church, they believed in monogamy that is one partner for one man. The Romantics added to that and proclaimed that this partner should complete and fulfill you. The romantics United love and sex. The romantics were irrational, deluded and impractical. An institution that unites love and sex is flawed simply because sex is a form of expression. Sex is gratifying a desire. Sex is individuality. Sex procreates. It is possible to love you and not be sexually attracted to you. In the same way that I can have a mistress that I have sexual relations with and not love. In fact, it is the norm in our culture. We see this on books like “The Great Gatsby” with the characters of Tom Buchanan, Daisy, Tom’s mistress and Gatsby. Dispite his known infidelity, Tom goes back home to Daisy. We see this with Daisy too, she has an affair with Gatsby and later goes back to Tom. For Tom, Daisy represents stability, his heart and it is the same with Daisy. Their infidelities don’t mean that they don’t love each other. This is also exhibited on the 1974 movie “Emmanuelle”, where Emmanuelle’s partner doesn’t marry her for mere possession, he marries her because he loves her. He encourages her to explore her sexual desires and fantasies with other people besides him, citing “You not my beauty, not my property”. All that he asks for in the relationship is transparency and honesty. For them communication and trust is vitally important. They understand that love and sex can be separate. This makes the bond they have for one another strong. For love is patient and understanding. Love is practicality and reason. Love is not vain and shallow. It is not narcissistic entitlements and pride. Love operates at a positive wavelength. It calibrates at a high conscious level. Love is the default language of the world. Love is life.
Maybe there’s wisdom in monogamy for it creates a world of order in your life. Monogamy is stable and often reliable. It fosters closer relations in the family. Monogamy is warm, stable and secure. It makes life meaningful for we can raise our children and our grandchildren and die gracefully. Monogamy is consistent and always there for you. At least that’s what it promises on paper. The salesman who’s selling us on the idea of marriage is a great one because we still go into marriage head first dispite the staggering divorce rates. The odds of a divorce are 1 in 2, that’s 50% – that means either you or a friend is getting a divorce. This is because of the unrealistic promises of romanticism. I can’t be your everything. I can’t fill the void in your heart or complete you. I am not your savior. We can’t unite love and animal sex in our relationship, we can do it for a while but don’t expect it to last forever. Reason being is that I am flawed. I am a human being and I have my days were I am not at my best. Sometimes my actions are repulsive, bad natured and suspect. I have deep rooted insecurities. I am a horrible person but I try my best to be presentable. I am repressed and I will exhibit undesirable behavior. I am a mess and untidy. Sometimes I will get defensive and angry. I am narcissistic. I have a big ego. I am imperfect. I am a born sinner. With that said, let’s create a love that will be accomodative and sustaining for someone like me. I don’t believe in forever because I live in a vacuum of time and space. So let’s create something practical and usable. What is the reason of our union? Is it for protection and wealth, is it for a partnership, is it for cohabitation, is it to start and raise a family, is it the sex, is it because you love me and want to be with me forever and ever? Let’s discuss this and put it in the world. Let’s discuss how we can make provisions for our inadequacies. Let’s come to an agreement that will suit me and you. Let’s make our love objective and with a criteria, it will help regulate our actions and we will never take each other for granted.
In his comedy special, comedian Kevin Hart explores the difference between new relationships and relationships that have gone the long mile. He explains that he hates new relationships because everything is fake and we are in a continual process to impress our partner. He states that we are willing to do anything to prove we are the right person, that we regulate our impulses and emotions, that we are overly generous with everything including sharing food off our plates on our dates – despite the fact that we don’t like sharing food. He contrasts this with old relationships, where the couple are highly familiar with each other. He makes a joke stating that if that couple went inside a shop and the one person came out with snacks and the other one came out with Juice and the one with the snacks asked the one with the juice for a sip, the person with the juice would be outraged. That he wouldn’t share his juice and it would be the topic of the whole day. Mileage on relationships reveals people’s true nature and character is the aim of this joke. Urban Poet Kanye West, explores this on songs “Paranoid” and “RoboCop” in the awesome 2008 album “808’s and Heartbreaks”. Kanye talks about a girl who completely changes on her, she’s irrational, lacks trust and overly paranoid. This paranoia creates in her a RoboCop, whose constantly surveiling Kanye hoping to get evidence. The idea here is that the romantics version of love can make you crazy. Simply because it’s built on possession, ownership and entitlement to a person. The romantics love is the same as slave trading. It is a demon that needs to be exorcised from culture. We need a new kind of love. One that is intelligent, practical, reasonable and life affirming. Generally, there are 3 stages of love. First is the infatuation stage, where everything about our love object is perfect. We just can’t get enough of that person. The relationship is new and burning with desire. Sex is a constant and we just can’t keep our hands of each other. The duration of this stage is anywhere between a year to 3 years. Then we have the second stage. In this phase, the couple start the process of knowing each other. This stage is the fruit of the infatuation phase.
It is the most rewarding phase as it fosters closer relations. It fosters intimacy and spirituality. It is liberating. It is fulfilling. The 3rd stage is the accumulation of the 1st and 2nd phases. It is the limit. A place where everything dies. This is because everything has been established. Behaviors are now habits and novelty ceases to exist. You know everything about your partner and she knows everything about you. It can even be said that she knows you better than you know yourself. This is the natural order of all relationships. Unless, you can bring it back to the first step (infatuation phase) it will die. Hence, redefining yourself and creating relationship goals is key. It will keep the fire burning and enhance new qualities you didn’t know existed in you. It will generate a sense of wonder in the relationship. It will make your partner fall in love with you all over again. It will keep your relationship youthful and exciting. Relationship goals are key because at this point in the relationship you are one, a unit, a pair and as such a third entity has been created. This third entity is the love you have for each other and it has to grow, it has to self-realize. This third entity is a energy that needs to grow and expand. It needs fuel like how your body needs food. It needs love and support. It needs continual growth. Relationship goals or mutual goals are what will propel the relationship forward. It will refresh things in the relationship. It will refresh the stages or phases in the relationship. This is because goals require specialized focus and attention. It activates traits and talents you didn’t know existed in you. Goals are challenging and hard. Goals require a lot of work. This is what will keep your relationship flourishing.
Alternatively, we could just have a 5 year lease on love and marriage. Nothing in life is certain, especially the union of two individuals. This is because of cultural differences and our perceptions of the world. Our history and past makes us distinct from one another. We have different intentions and plans. Life is a process that keeps unfolding and developing. Evolution is constantly evolving and expanding. Change is eminent. Marriage as forever is a hoax like the moonlandings. We need to be able to adapt to new environments and ultimately conquer only to move on to newer pastures. A 5 year lease on marriage is active, it is progressive and will provide different perspectives. A 5 year lease on relationships and marriage provides us with freedom to live life on our terms. We will never take our partners for granted. Our lives will be filled with novelty and we will grow and become all that we can be. But maybe the state won’t allow that, to that I propose empathy and understanding for our partners. I propose patience and a light view of the world. I propose we treat our partners like we do our children. This is because, we are all children at heart. Maybe we forgot that we are children because the world is so harsh and doesn’t condone childish behaviors. The word “childish” has become an insult, a smear campaign on one’s character and conduct, a terrible disaster. However, it doesn’t have to be that way. Consider for a minute how we treat our children. We are more emphatic, we are understanding and we are patient with them. This comes from the fact they are young, small, vulnerable and don’t know any better. We think it’s cute when they make blunders and we laugh. We are gentle. We are considerate and love them unconditionally. That is something we must adopt in our relationships. We should treat our partners like children. They are children at heart and also don’t know any better, in fact no one does. We are all lost in need of guidance, love and assurance. We should adopt the the action of giving and not expecting anything from our partners. Give with a pure heart. Give everything you have. This action will give longevity in the relationships in your life. You will be a better human being because you will be more empathic. People will seek refuge in your hands. If you treat your partner and the people all around you like children, you will see the light side of life and will laugh when life issues you a challenge. You will love yourself more. You will be strong and affirmed.
In 1998, critically acclaimed artist, the queen Lauryn Hill released an album titled “The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill”, it was lauded by critics and won Album of the year at the grammys. The album explores the subject of love. It is the most important music album ever created and is what love sounds likes. It covers, self-love, self-worth, self-identity, romantic love, family love, destiny, law of attraction, self-actualization, self-realization, ambition, Taoism, the human spirit or soul and happiness. It is an amazing album, unrivaled in any genre of music. The album is enlightened. It is an album that has the capability of changing your life in just one listen. It is an album that calibrated at an high energy level. It is natural and free. To add to the texture of the album, Lauryn Hill got kids to talk and discuss the subject of love. These kids give their insights on what they think love is – on what love means to them. That makes the album sound so special. It is heart-warming. You will never find a better album on love than this one, I promise you – it’s impossible. I encourage you to take a listen.
antakalipa 