Psychology

Sandton City

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Sandton City

I had a date with destiny. She was everything I thought I wanted. She was prosperous and promised to share her riches with me. She was gorgeous with her make-up on and towering heels. She resembled a Mac advertisement like Pearl Thusi. Damn! I was star struck, lights were flickering all about, it was like a dream and I was unconscious, locked in a trance of Gucci patterns and colors. She was glorious. I was impressed but that was not enough for her. To grant my hearts desires I had to give her my soul. To relinquish control of my core beliefs and values. She wanted my blood on the contract. It was a big test for me. Do I give in and get lost in the magic maze? Or do I stay put and believe in my process and believe that time will prove me right? I’ve been hungry all my life, starved to the bone, dreaming, contemplating about forever and her role in my life. I come from a place of broken dreams, Alex, the hood, a place where dreams die. There’s a reason it’s called Gomorrah, it’s biblical, because it can be hell. Will Sandton City save me with her designer dress and Louis Vuitton handbag? Am I willing to recede into the darkness with her? I have been broke for so long that I feel like a virgin. Do I trust her? She wants too much, I can’t. I will not bend to her rules, her conventions of passivity. She wants to dominate and make all the decisions for me. While life is a stage, I am not a puppet stringed along by a puppeteer. Unfortunately, this is not a Charlie Kaufman movie, this is my life and I am the lead, the star. Maybe if she encouraged growth and freewill. For goodness sakes I am life, a miracle; I sometimes wonder how am I conscious, who are you to want to control that? God? I wish she loved me for who I am. That’s a big frailty in the psychology of man, the tendency to want to be loved and accepted for our intrinsic qualities even though life is subjective and relative. The nerve, we truly are narcissistic creatures. Still, I thought you’d be the one to stroke my ego. It’s a tragedy that life never unfolds the way we want it to. I couldn’t take your offer I am sorry. I am better than this. I am not someone you can ground. I vibrate on a higher frequency. I am too opinionated and yes, I am a “Mr. Know it all” who thinks he knows it all. I won’t apologize for being an individual. I won’t apologize for thinking for myself. I see the world through my lens and don’t seek confirmation from anyone. Do I have a problem with authority? Yes, and I am an egotistical narcissist who has grand visions about his future. That I say with pride. And maybe I am deluded but you can’t bring me down with your domineering and condescending words. You cannot validate who I am, that’s my job. I am too dimensional. I am too great. I emit an energy that’s commanding and my presence is felt like acid to the burning flesh. I am fire, a phenomenon you can’t keep your eyes off. I am exciting like the first day of the new year, I represent great prospects. I am overwhelming like running water in a glass. I am the best. Keep your promises of grandeur, I don’t worship false prophets. I create my own destiny, play the cards that I deal and dominate the world I walk on. While it’s true that I am too hungry, I won’t just eat anything. I am too finicky like a rich housewife better yet a Duchess, a Princess in the upper echelon of the aristocratic circle and so, I never settle. I know my worth. I know where I want to be. It will only take a moment for everything to change. I want it, the winning shot, the headlines, my name in lights, the glory! I will wait for my break, it’s coming.

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Daddy Issues

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Daddy Issues

She’s got daddy issues, she’s eager to please. Her daddy left when she was young and she has never been at peace. No masculine figure in her life, she sucks dick to appease. Rumor has it she blew the whole squad, got her on all fours like a quad. Insecure, void and empty, always looking for something to fill her, hard and phallic it fills her. Every man looking to fuck her, slut shame her. A pornstar in the making, her pubs are already trending, legs in the air but her confidence descending. That’s why she’s promiscuous cause every boy is an opportunity to get close to someone, she wants to be loved by someone, the attention validates her, it feels like she matters, reality sucks and confidence in tatters. So she’ll do whatever you like to please you, the pussy she will lease you, for free and include videos, knowing they will leak, her nudes are making rounds and are close to peak. Her self-worth is all yours to keep. She’s got daddy issues, I could get her to drop her panties and wrap her legs around my waist. Cum on her face or use protection to excrete the waste. A bit unstable, should come with a label. So easy and gullible, she thinks she’s unlovable, calls every man daddy. Men use her as a caddy, to store their seeds inside, only to contaminate the can and abandon the mission like a ban. She’s got daddy issues, easy to get her in the sack. Missionary style or blow out her back. Fuck her out in the deck, so everyone can see, issues deeper than a shipwreck at sea. She’s got daddy issues, her life is sad, you’ll need a tissue. All the men in her life are disappointments, the world is cold with no one to kiss you.

Dahmer

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Dahmer

Monsters lurk everywhere in the world and it’s hard to spot them. They have learned to camouflage themselves in the darkness, it engulfs and consumes them, blackening their souls turning them into shadows. Analytical Psychologist Carl Jung explains that human beings carry within themselves both elements of the good and bad, that we are both angels and demons, sick, demented, evil, dark, spoiled. Because we live in a world where we have to co-exist to survive, we surpress these undesirable qualities relegating them into the shadows. Unchecked the shadow can grow to consume our personality and rule our subconscious minds enabling us to act unconsciously. Our shadows can turn us into psychopaths who lack empathy and thrive on destruction. The shadow can enable the individual to be narcissistic, egoistic and maniacal. Shedding a light on our dark sides helps in controlling the shadow. Acknowledging you have a dark side keeps the shadow at bay. Life is a balance of both the good and bad, of the light and the darkness. We are both polar extremes of the same spectrum. You are a killer and a murderer, human nature says you are. You might find pleasure in murdering your brother in cold blood. Cain certainly did when he murdered his brother Able to spite God. The murder was premeditated, he felt no remorse, the action liberated him. I know I am bad, I am capable of savagery and genocide. I may even take pleasure in torturing and tormenting you to appease my dark side. Your suffering might even give me comfort. Am I another Jeffrey Dahmer? Would I drug you, strangle you to death, masterbate over your body, have sex with your unconscious body, dissect and sever your body parts, skin the flesh from your bones, cook and eat your body parts for dinner? The capacity for evil in a human being is unfathomable. Maybe I am not familiar with my own darkness. I don’t know what I might do to you in the right circumstances. The story of Jeffrey Dahmer haunts me because he did it time and time again. A serial killer with a death toll of 17. No one was safe, from boys aged 14 to adults aged 33. He butchered his victims, cut off their limbs, drilled holes in their skulls and injected hydrochloric acid, severed their heads and preserved them in the refrigerator, inserted the bones in the oven to burn them and then crushed them with his sledgehammer, he cut his victims into pieces and then boiled them, he cooked his victims and he ate them, he ate them! He used acid and other chemicals to burn the skin of his victims skulls to preserve them. He bleached the skulls and if they were too weak he pulverized them, some he kept and used when he was masterbating. He felt no remorse, it was a compulsion for him, he was conscious of his actions, he knew what he was doing, he wasn’t crazy or diagnosed with some sort of mental illness, he consciously experimented with his victims bodies in his own words to create zombies, he loved doing it, it was his vocation. I don’t want to believe that I am as wicked and evil as Dahmer but I know it’s possible. To deny this is to repress my own darkness and wickedness. To know I am capable of such darkness frightens me. I hope Jung and Freud have an answer for somebody like Dahmer. Maybe it is the ID out of control. Sigmund Freud explained that the ID is the seat of both the repressed material and the drives, to which had been added to the unconscious fantasies and unconscious feelings, notably guilt feelings. Expanding on this idea, Freud states that the mind is divided into 3; into what we call the ID, Ego and the Superego. The Superego is the watchful, judging, punishing agency in the individual. The ID is self-gratifying and amoral and the Ego is the middle ground of the two and strives to be moral. I don’t think Freud and Jung would understand an individual quite as complicated as Dahmer, to try and understand somebody like Dahmer is impossible. I mean he seduced and lured his victims to his place, drugged them, killed them, cut them and sat with the stench of their decomposing bodies. The smell was second nature to him. Sometimes psychology is not enough, perhaps this is a genetic thing, maybe his the exception in the family tree. When he was finally caught he didn’t resist, he was compliant and told the whole truth, every horrific detail, where he hid body parts, how many he had killed, the hearts, biceps, legs he ate, when the killing spree commenced – everything. He knew what he had done was evil and he asked for the death penalty that was not granted because it was banned in his State. He was accepting of who he was, he was not bothered, he was not haunted by ghosts and demons, he was not remorseful, he even had fans who corresponded with him in jail, fans who projected onto him their undesirable feelings, desires and fantasies and he reciprocated back that energy. Jeffrey Dahmer is your definitive example of a monster, he scares me. Maybe I am just scared of myself.

Our tits, my son

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Our tits, my son.

My son got born earlier in the morning and I am ecstatic. He is a gift from my ancestors and the Universe. I treasure him. He is my gold in a world that’s been digitized; valuable, tangible, priceless. It’s like falling in love for the first time, I am in la, la, land, heaven, a place of pure bliss devoid of the construct of time. I’ve never felt love quite like this, it’s like I am floating on butterflies through the clouds of the light blue sky. He makes me believe in miracles. There is a God, – he is proof, a blessing. I am thankful and grateful for this opportunity. I will teach him everything I know with an open heart and a lot of love. I will guide him. Help strengthen him to make sure he is the great man destiny intended. I’ll teach him about business and wealth creation. I was lucky I was broke and built an empire out of nothing. Being broke is experiencing your own mortality, it is being vulnerable and helpless to effect change or influence outside stimuli, that’s why I worked so hard to be rich, to have the illusion of immortality, to be invincible. You’ll be invincible from the start, girls are going to be sending you pictures captioned “you could tear this up”- I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. I’ll teach him about the importance of having an inner scorecard and not one based on external factors. Don’t claim to be anyone you’re not. Love yourself unconditionally. Respect everyone and beware of placing too much value on material things because they end up owning you, depriving you of your peace and happiness. When you say you are going to do something, do it, no excuses, be a man of your word my son. I’ll teach him about girls and women. True, they are an enigma and I don’t know much about their motivations and thought patterns. They are truly a strange species, unpredictable, highly volitile, sometimes unstable, frightening and devastating like a natural disaster. They are difficult to assess and understand, maybe they really are from Venus and us from Mars, it would certainly explain why it’s inhospitable for man; too much chaos presided, women can’t co-exist with one another and I don’t mean to boast but man is returning to Mars. Mars is a great place filled giant screens that showcase football and other sports daily, the home of Elon Musk, Richard Branson and Jeff Bezos, a place of sport cars and super sleek, fast Teslas, pool tables, infinite alcohol and drugs, no tough decisions, no responsibilities and no circumstances. A place of Goodfellas like Scorsese and De Niro but no death, just collaboration, a brotherhood and positive energy.

But in planet Earth, women are useful as you will soon experience. For one they register and process large quantities of data faster and more efficiently. This is important in the matters of life and death, you need a strong counsel. The trick is just to love and accept them as they are, don’t try to understand them or assert your will on them, understand that disaster might strike at anytime and accept reality for what it is – I think that’s what God intended. Just love them because even with all their uncertainties, they are the most valuable species in the whole Universe, they make life worthwhile, they are the nurturers of life. I’ll give you all the information I’ve attained from my interactions with them. I suggest you seek consultation from other wise men who will also share their experiences and knowledge, this will give you a more wholistic picture. I can’t guarantee concise data regarding women my son, no man can, we are from Mars and they are from Venus.

Of course, there’s this issue of the Oedipus Complex. I suspect there will be some hostility between me and you. You want to possess your mother (my woman) and you are rightly entitled to her. I won’t oppose you son, for the first few months, she is all yours. I will refrain from all acts of jealousy. I know you will appreciate those tits more than anything in the world. Your father is a genius, a visionary and I chose those tits for you. I qualified and discarded a lot of applicants for you to have those perfect tits. That’s my early gift to you because I love you so much. Enjoy them, take your time, don’t rush to get old, drive slow and enjoy the scenery and sensations. Those are our tits, my son, at least for now.

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Faith

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Faith

If I could just see Faith just one last time. Yes, definitely in my top 5. I met her through a friend. Easily the greatest pass of all time. Thank you mpinch, I am eternally grateful. I really needed that pass. It was difficult with Faith. I never would have gotten that close to her without my boy. It was impossible. What made Faith a mission was the fact that she didn’t live in Gomora, she came here to visit her grandparents. She was a cheese-girl. She grew up here in Gomora and that’s how my boy knew her. When they were younger, they had this kids romance thing. I first saw Faith in 2010, I remember it was game day and Argentina was playing Nigeria. Argentina won courtesy of a Heinze header in the 6th minute. I wasn’t particularly impressed with that performance. Messi or Higuain didn’t score and I expected better. After the game I went out to get some air and there I saw her. It was as if time stopped for a while, everything proceeded in slow motion. It was like I was in a Scorsese movie looking at the girl of my dreams. She was absolutely perfect. She had a million dollar body. Great ass, good thigh to ass ratio. Flat stomach, she was fit like Serena Williams. Yellow bone in complexion. She had frickles on her face. That day she had just done her hair so she was brand new. She was a stunna! I remember looking at her and thinking “Nah, not today, Argentina had a bad game. Messi didn’t score. I can’t do anything today, I am useless”. Of course, I was rationalizing the whole situation. The truth is that heartburn set in and I didn’t think I’d be able to talk to her. What was I going to say to her? After that I always thought about her, thinking about how I missed a great chance and how I’d do anything for another chance. It was a while since I saw here again, I think I saw her again after a year. I was with my boy and it was like 8pm and we saw Faith walking with her friend. I flipped, I was like “Yoh mfana, here’s this girl again”. The showoff enquired “You mean her?” and I said “Yes, do you know her”. He said “Sure, follow me.” I couldn’t believe my luck. We approached the two girls and hey what do you know he did know her. We talked and we exchanged names. Mxit was a dying technology but I knew that I’d be able to get Faith’s number indirectly through that medium. So I asked and she gave it to me. I also asked her friends number for some diversion. The whole interaction needed to be neutral. I deleted the friends number when I got home and started work on Faith. We started chatting on Mxit and it was good for a while, so we took things to the next level and went to Whatsapp. I am really not a social media guy so it was all for her. I asked to see her in the flesh and I told her that I liked her and gradually things started happening. We spent a lot of time together when she came visiting. She made my heart beat like bass. We would go on dates. It was great. On the second date I screwed up, I don’t know why I did that. I kept talking about this girl I had a crush on in Primary who attended school with her. The girl I was referring to was a stunna and Faith knew her even though she down played it. Next thing I heard was how she didn’t like how I spoke because used a lot of “Tsotsi taal” in my language like “Why don’t you speak properly?”. I was confused but I realized I was trouble like “that’s how I talk, I can’t change”. She hinted I was too ghetto for her. She started drifting away from me. The more she pulled back, the more I advanced. It didn’t look good. I came across as needy and insecure. I ended up letting her go. Lesson learned never talk about another girl when you are with a prospective. It’s a simple one, I don’t know how I missed that one. I wanted to make her insecure, it backfired; a fools failed attempt. I did some Introspection. Man, Faith was great, she was beautiful, smart, had a great sense of humor, banging body and her laugh was incredible. She made me feel like Superman every time she laughed at my jokes. She was top quality.

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Avoid stepping into a great man’s shoes

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Avoid stepping into a great man’s shoes.

A good friend of mine came to me because he needed some advice. I thought “Oh, okay”. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to assist because I am not the advice type. However, I am a good listener so I was pretty sure we could come up with a solution. To assist someone who needs advice, I often use the Socratic method, that is help using framing questions, this way you think that you came up with the situation on your own because you thought for yourself. It is effective because this way no judgments are cast and you don’t give awful advice. The truth is that we already know what to do and often times we just need validation from the outside world. The art of giving good advice is getting the other person to lay out all his cards and ask questions. This way the other person is reflective and your job is done. Don’t say what you think because that’s not what the other person needs, plus your judgment is flawed in any case because you are biased and are projecting – this is not about you.

I listened. He told me about how his in love with this girl whose with this other guy but it doesn’t really matter because the girl loves him and not the guy. A love triangle, I thought. He was in trouble because there’s a power struggle in this dynamic and only one person won, the one on the top. But I didn’t say this out loud, I just merely asked “How do you know that this girl loves you?”. He responded “I just know it. I see it in her eyes. We love each other, it’s always been that way. I retorted, “how do you know?”. Finally he responded “she told me so”. I shook my head not convinced. I then asked “how many years has she been with this guy?”. He responded “About 6 years”. I let that sink in a bit and there was silence for a bit. But in my mind I thought this is a irrevocable case and an attachment style has been established. His not just fighting a mutual understanding, his fighting routines and habits, poor fellow is deluded. He filled it up by saying “But it hasn’t been a smooth 6 years and they sometimes had bad fights and separated”, I responded “Everyone has a bad patch” and he countered “Yes, but not like this, he slapped her, he beats her and his a cheat”. I responded “Okay”. I continued “What do you think of doing?”. He responded “I want to get her”. I inquired “Why don’t you?”. He responded “Because of this guy”. Confused, I asked “Why? Do you know him?”. He responded, “Yes, his close”. And so I recapped his story for him like; “She loves you even though she’s still with her partner of 6 years. She’s the object of desire in this pyramid and everyone is familiar with one another?”. I stopped and the room was quiet for a while. Then he broke the silence and asked “Why doesn’t she leave him?” he was thoughtful. I remained quiet. He put me on the spot and asked what I’d do. I wanted to be neutral so I spoke about the other guy and how I respected his 6 years. To deflect the question I made a joke saying “Avoid stepping into a great man’s shoes”, that statement hit him like a snipper on the rooftop. Sorrowfully, he murmured “She’s not my girl”. I felt bad. I rolled a joint and we smoked. It was 6pm and the streets were flooded with people from work, it was peak time, prime time and Avanzas were filled to the brim on the Johnbrant street from Pan African Mall. We just sat by the side of the road and witnessed life, we were silent, we saw beautiful women walking, we saw girls who were too young but had a lot of potential, we saw children in their school uniforms walking home, we saw kids with their friends, we saw men in their overalls and boots who carried their lunch bags, just on the other street a couple of boys were playing soccer and there were roars of youthful energy, the atmosphere was vibey and busy, bells from cars and laughs from people was all we heard, cigarettes were selling like an IPO, it was beautiful and we both appreciated the scenery. Life was normal. Life was happy. Despite the cold truth, it was still a good day.

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I don’t understand women

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I don’t understand women

I don’t understand women. I tried but it’s too difficult. Maybe my mind is not meant to keep such data. Don’t get me wrong, I can get a woman to bed. That’s not a problem, that’s easy, it is as effortless as breathing. It’s engrained in the human psyche, it is a evolutionary trait, my ancestors could do it, Apes can do it – in fact most life forms can. That’s how nature refreshes things, reproduction. So sex is not really special, not in the grander scale of the Universe. All of life engages in it. It is a requisite for sustaining life. It is elementary to life. No one really has an upper hand because anybody can be seduced. Life is not sex it is a byproduct of sex. Sex is not the goal of life. So you see getting a girl into bed is not difficult. In fact she wants it, she’s programmed by genetics, evolution and other invisible things that constitute and make up reality. Sex is natural so she sees through all your facades, deceptions and ego trips. In fact she encourages everything and plays you like Fifa to score, to get laid. She is using you. A spin to the narrative that men use women for sex. That’s not true, women want sex just as much as men. Man has penis and woman has vagina, we need each other. We are complimentary, YingYang. My intention is to ommit sex out of this picture but I don’t think I can. Simply because I think it’s this sexual orientation that makes girls difficult to understand. Little girls are taught from a very young age that they are “special”, that they are “the prize”. This is enforced through television, music, books, movies and popular culture as a whole. By the time they are able to use Facebook they see this playing out. They get millions of inboxes from guys seeking out their attention and it plays to the narrative that they are indeed “the prize” because it gives them the power to qualify men like; “I’d rather go out with Steve because he has a car, Kevin doesn’t”. Women always want the best pick, the best that they can possibly get. They do this subconsciously and unconsciously but this holds true also for men. Men qualify women based on their looks and certain features they find appealing. These are important considerations for the offspring. Women also do the same but the most important thing for them is competence like; can he take care of me, can he provide for the family? So is their thought process derived from possessions? Are women bloodsuckers? I don’t know but the hypothesis that they are is incomplete because another girl might go out with Kevin dispite the fact that he doesn’t have a car, if you tick the other boxes like competence, confidence and emotional stability, possessions and materials might not be a factor. So it has to be their thought pattern, neuroscience. This is definitely not about psychology. For one Psychology is a science, it is Universal, there might be different cases but the applications and solutions to these cases are more or less the same. Two, Sigmund Freud the godfather of psychology professed to not understand women, he didn’t understand their motivations and why they do what they do. It amazes me because Freud was an intelligent guy, he had all these theories and is a major contributor to field of psychology. But when it came to the motivations and actions of women, he shot blanks. I ask myself what chance do I have, if Freud also didn’t understand. I am not smarter than Freud. I like Neurosciences attempt at understanding women. In a nutshell, it says that everything in a woman’s head is connected, whereas things in men’s head are in compartments, in boxes that you open one at a time and close when you done. Man is more direct and derives his meaning from solving problems. Whereas woman is confused. For woman, “Yes” can mean “No” and “No” can mean “Yes”. They use doublespeak like it’s 1984.This analogy explains the unpredictable nature of women. Sometimes they are volitile and erratic like a Tsunami causing destruction and hell, other times they are calm like the ocean at night. Its difficult to understand women because it requires a lot of attention, something that isn’t a strong point for men. To tell you the truth, I don’t think women even understand themselves. That’s why they always need to talk, to explore and crystallize their thoughts. Women talk about everything and this gives them solice. Still, I think they are closer to the source. I think they are closer to God. They are used more by God to effect changes. My reasoning comes from the work of Carl Jung with his work on the unconscious. Women do things more unconsciously, whereas man is more reflexive, by this I mean man is always trying to instill order. Man is more active, whereas woman is passive – woman just is. This gives her the permission to cause chaos and watch on the sidelines. It gives her the opportunity to be spontaneous. Woman is the accident murderer who doesn’t remember what she did. This explains mans urge to subconsciously please woman. This would explain the million inboxes she gets on her socials. Woman has options because the world reacts to her. That’s a powerful realization. Maybe man is not meant to understand woman. Science has deluded man into thinking that he is God. Perhaps not knowing and not being able to understand is what makes everything worthwhile. Just maybe uncertainty is good, it certainly keeps everyone on their feet.

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Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

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Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

If you had to, who would you banish from the confines of your mind. Who would you completely erase from your subconscious mind? If you didn’t meet them, would your life be better? Would the decision alter the trajectory and quality of your life? Would you then find the urge to follow your dreams? To make the best out of every moment you are handed. Are you willing to start afresh, to start anew and this time on your own terms and conditions? Would that make your happy? Who do you wish you never met? Is it your boyfriend? Is he boring and emotionally unavailable? Is it your girlfriend? Is she needy and insecure? Is it your friends and the lifestyle you have chosen? Is it your mistress and her crazy antics and unpredictable behavior? Who do you want to off like a button and live in an enlightened state. An illuminated state where you realize the importance of orientating yourself to your dreams and goals. You are the most important thing in all of existence and your livelihood and state of consciousness is paramount. Who would you cast out like a demon and liberate your mind. Which neural connections would you sever in order to construct better pathways? Pathways that enhance existence and lead to self-realization. Who do you need to relegate in the recess of the dark abyss to maintain order in your life? Who do you need to forget, to discard like rotten fish. Whose ordour is so unbearable that you need to leave the room? Whose energy kills like doom? Look at your life. Inspect your decisions. Cancel subscriptions from features that don’t show in your life. Move on. Carry on. Forget. Let time pass in between. Forgetting is bliss. Forgetting is preparing for the future. Things that don’t meet your current standards are the stale past made to wither like leaves in autumn. Spring ahead and witness your life blossom. Forget people who don’t think you’re awesome. Forget the mistakes of the past. Forget what could have been. Be present and look at everything unfold before your eyes. Expand your horizon and look farther. Stretch your imagination. Explore. Create new memories. Forget everything that isn’t making you grow, reside in a bubble of bliss and optimism; eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.

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The metamorphosis to a child

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The metamorphosis to a child

I like Freuds work on the Superego. Basically the Superego is what regulates conduct, values and morality in a human being. The Superego is derived from society and the teachings from our parents. It serves to regulate order in the world. It’s the total opposite from the ID. The ID is self-indulgent, it is all about me and what I want and desire – to hell with everybody! The ID is unreasonable and greedy. The ID is undesirable, repressed and often unconscious. The middle between the Superego and the ID is the Ego. It decides what is the right course of action for the individual to take. The Ego gathers data from the Superego and the ID and finds a compromise. What manifests in the world is the Ego manifesting itself. This information is useful because we all a Superego, ID and ego. Having a Superego that is in line with society’s standards helps us navigate the world for it enables us to practice empathy with one another. A Superego makes us decent with one another and it is how we foster relationships with one another. However, it can also become a prison, locking you to the opinions of others. This is dangerous because you might lose your identity, attempting to please the people in your life. Regardless, the Superego is what is needed to navigate the world successfully, for it enables you to understand society and the world all around. Without the Superego you run the risk of becoming detached. This is risky because by nature man is a social creature, he needs social connections to find a mate and acquaintances who will help him in all spheres of life. Having a Superego that is morally aligned gives one factory settings in life.

The problem with the Superego is that it fosters a collective mindset. It fails to account for the individual. It keeps an individual at the bottom of Maslow’s pyramid of needs. It hinders the process of self-realization. To actualize you need the ID to stand up and say “No!”. The “No” must be backed up with reason and evidence. The “No” has to keep the customs of the world in mind, it has to account for the Superego and still rebel. This rebellious spirit is what will enable and individual to create his own path. This “No” must be akin to a lion’s roar. It must be prideful, affirmed, grounded and strong. In doing so, the individual will become a Lion. The Lion is something we must all aspire to become because it fully asserts its will. A Lion is the king of its life. It operates in the world with its conditions. The Lion is a big step to self-actualization. The Lion fosters in self-identity in the individual. The Lion makes the individual confident in his abilities. The Lion has a swagger about its walk, it has ingrained qualities that are immovable, it is assured and lives life on its own terms. Activating the Lion in you requires that you only say “No!” and mean it. It requires that you live your “No!”, it requires that you rid yourself of fears and others people’s opinions and judgments. It requires that you live life for yourself. Choosing to say “No!” unlocks a “Yes” for your mode of existence. This means “Yes” to your passions, “Yes” to your dreams and goals, “Yes” to everything you want to be! Saying “No” to your Superego gives the leverage to your ID. It gives your ID expression and fulfillment. It gives you an opportunity to be self-indulgent, an opportunity to know and master your true self, it gives you an open canvas to do as you please. Life is the accumulation of different stages, the Lion stage or the exploration of the ID must come after the Superego has been mastered. This enables sustainable development towards the journey of self-realization.

The natural progression of the Lion phase activates the last metamorphosis in the journey towards self-realization, that is one of the child. The child represents seeing for the first time. It represents the process of creation and novelty. It represents a genuine wonder at the world. To a child’s
mindeye, everything is possible. This is the spirit that propels the individual towards the journey of self-realization and actualization. It is the spirit of creation. The natural tendency for man is to create hence Human “Being” entailing presence and becoming more than we are. “Being” is exerting yourself to the world. “Being” is striving to be more. “Being” is an action, it is consciousness and at a fundamental level it is creation itself. We lose this essence in the modern world because we get indoctrinated to man-made systems and adhere to conventional wisdom. In doing so we get identified with our Superego. And as we identify more with the Superego, we surpress the ID, scaling the power to the Superego, enabling the Ego to assume the dominant personality of the Superego. We are taught and programmed to lose ourselves, to abandon our individuality. The modern world teaches us to regress. To find the childlike spirit in your soul, you have to find your passions again, to connect with them, you have to follow what makes your eyes glisten, what makes them shine, you need to adopt your own values and have a deep appreciation for life. You need to live with constant gratitude for life. You need to sway away from the majority and their customs. You need to look at the world with novelty, bewilderment and awe. You need to find yourself again. The spirit of the child is what makes life worthwhile. It is positive energy and calibrates at a high vibration frequency. It is self-sustaining. It enriches your spirit. The spirit of the child is the only way to Self-actualize. Find your inner child voice and let it consume everything you do. This will keep you young, nourish your soul and will give your life meaning. Your true self is the inner child.

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Dear Mr. Scorsese

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Dear Mr. Scorsese

I change my mind, I was stupid, I was impulsive, I am an idiot and I apologize. I have to retract my earlier statement. “The Irishman” is not my favorite movie, in fact I don’t have a favorite movie. You changed things for me. Your excellence, your gift, your creativity, your longevity, your passion, your movies. I am only a human being and I can’t resist the urge to compare, but you, your movies, they confuse me so much. I don’t know which is better. I use to think “Casino” was my favorite movie. Sharon Stone as Ginger was inspiring. I truly loved her performance. She taught me a lot about life. I will never forget her. Joe Persci and Robert De Niro were of course excellent so there’s no need to make a comment there. Robert De Niro was one of my favorite actors but now I don’t have any. That goes for you too DiCaprio, you mean nothing to me now. Things changed in 2013 when “The Wolf Of Wall Street” came out. I was obsessed with it. I will never forget that conversation between Mark Henna and Jordon Belfort. It shattered reality for me. It was like realizing that the moon landings were faked, it was awesome! I used to watch it every year on my birthday, it was a ritual of mine. I love how you can teach me about life sir. “The Wolf of Wall Street” was amazing! It was quite an experience, it was grand, provocative, truthful and fearless. Critics claimed that it perpetuated a lot of morally unacceptable behavior but they are wrong! That’s what greed does to a human being. You depicted the greed beautifully. I love how you made me identify with Jordon Belfort. I wanted to be him, I felt like him and then you took everything from me; the hot blonde, the kids, the expensive piece of real estate, the money and my profession. The tragedy! Oh Mr. Scorsese, only you can make me feel that way. I wish I could relive the experience of watching that movie again. It was a once in a lifetime movie. At least that’s what I thought, until I watched “Silence”, 3 years later and I was blown away! I loved “Silence”. It was so challenging. It covered the subjects of religion and morality. Wow, it is a powerful movie. I thought that was your best movie. But then fast forward 3 years later and you release “The Irishman”. Damn! You bring in Robert De Niro, Joe Persci and Al Pacino. You explore powerful subjects like our impending old age and death. That’s not all, you also cover love, loyalty and the mafia. That movie really touched me. It opened up the world for me. I learned a lot. Truly speaking it was the greatest movie that I had ever seen. Better than “The Godfather” trilogy, Scarface and Tarantino’s epic Inglorious Basterds. It was a big omission to concede on my side, it was hard. However, “The Irishman” deserved my number one spot. With that I was done, surely no movie is better than “The Irishman”. I proceeded with watching your other movies. I watched “The Last Temptation of Christ”, “Shutter Island” “Bringing out the Dead”, “The Color of Money”, “After Hours” “The Departed”, “Taxi Driver”, “The Aviator”, “Raging Bull”, “The King of Comedy” and “The Gangs of New York”. I was back to square one. I thought they were all legendary movies. I was confused, perplexed, “The Irishman” was no longer my favorite. I didn’t know which movie was my favorite. And so Mr. Scorsese, I would like to make things right. I don’t have a favorite anything in the world anymore. I don’t have a favorite actor. I don’t have a favorite director. I don’t identify with anything. I am a spectator now. I am neutral. I am a fence sitter. I live life without attachments. I will never judge and compare art ever again in my life! I will only enjoy, appreciate and applaud. This extends to all affairs in my life. I am now truly open-minded. I look forward to seeing more of your films and I thank you for what you have done for film. God bless.

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