Heaven

The first thing I am going to do when I get to heaven is get Ray Charles information. I need to see him perform. That would make my whole existence. He was a creative genius, one of the best and greatest talents the world has ever seen. He was amazing! Then I am going to a Amy Winehouse concert – the same day! I want to be in pure music bliss. I want to have a lot of fun, I want to dance, sing along to the lyrics and laugh with like minded individuals. Man I swear heaven is going to be so much fun! The next day I am keeping the momentum going. I want to see Louis Armstrong and wait for it John Coltrane, he will finish my second day in heaven but if I still have time I will head over to a Miles Davis concert, man what I would do to hear “Kind of Blues” live. So John, when you done with your set please be so kind to assist Miles. I’d continue my third day with Charles Mingus! Charles you and your team just have to perform “Devil Woman” and “Devil Blues”, I am bitterly disappointed that Colombia did a greatest hits and omitted those two bangers! Charles, if you can commit to playing those two songs, then I will give you the whole of Day 3. And on Day 4, hi there “Delfonics” and “Al Green”, you know I wouldn’t miss you guys. Besides, your music is going to help me get heaven pussy. Of course I will be there, in a flash! I think I will be settled by Day 5 so I will go to a Nina Simone concert and later Roberta Flack. Roberta baby, you just gotta sing “Killing Me Softly With His Song” for me. DAMN! Heaven would be a place that I would never want to leave. There are religions that promise 7 virgins for the deceased. Imagine that! 7 virgins, all for you. Isn’t that perfect? Isn’t that the end of suffering? That is excellent marketing by God and his angels. Still, it’s not appealing to me. How are the virgins? Are they opinionated virgins who think they have rights? Are they feminist virgins? You know what? No feminists in heaven! Yall can go to hell! Heaven is not a place for feminists. Heaven is a place for good women who are obedient. That’s all a man wants when his dead, 7 obedient virgin women, who will not talk too much and ask too many questions but rather serve as sex objects and suck this dick. That’s it, that’s all we want from heaven. Can you promise that God? I don’t think I’d want 7 virgin women even in heaven. It’s too much administration and work. Will they give it up easy or do I have to work for it? Knowing women they won’t give it up easily without a challenge or getting something in return. But maybe the ruler of heaven is Old Testament God. That would be so dope, if it is Old Testament God, I am confident we will be getting our promised pussy without a strain or any delay on our side. Old Testament God is a good open-minded guy. He ruled the Bible with fear and an iron fist, I am confident in his ability to keep women in line. A man doesn’t need 7 virgin women playing hard to get. There’s also the pressure and stress of satisfying 7 virgin women. Honestly, I don’t want that kind of stress when I am dead. It’s not worth it, I am dead and in heaven, I’d rather let loose. Heaven for me would be smoking Chronic the whole day. I’d rather not have a penis too. I definitely don’t want a vagina. No sexual orientations in my heaven. Just weed, music and maybe Gordons gin. But if God insists, I will have both a penis and a vagina. I think we can negotiate on boobs, they are not neccessary. I think God will side on me with this one. It’s so typical of Pixar making me ruminate about the second life. What if there is a second layer to life like on the movie “Coco”? What if life continues after death for the absolute last time before we get to heaven or hell? What if you get to relive all the decisions you made during your first life? What if Karma finally catches up with you on this second life? Damn! I enjoyed watching Pixars ideas on “Coco”. It was such a refreshing movie, filled with imagination, awesome storytelling techniques and emotive scenes. It’s such a classic! I expect the same thing with “Soul”. It is going to be a classic, I can feel it. Hoping for the Pygmalion effect with this one. I can’t wait.

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