Goat

the assembly improv show

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The Assembly Improv show

Improv – make something up, think on the spot, go with the flow, zen, Bruce Lee, be like water, be formless, quick witted, puns, irony, sacarsm and it has to be humorous! Let’s break the fourth wall, you there, yes you reading this, listening to this, yes hi, happy new year, acknowledge me, make things easier for yourself, I am not going anywhere.

On the square for the Assembly Improv show, filled to the brim, full house. Was with SamSays, it was a great show, unpredictable, spontaneous, quick witted and so funny. We couldn’t stop laughing, we were entertained from the first minute to the last. What I found to be most effective in Improv, is calm. You have to let things process, be in the moment, respond not react. Reactions are filled with anxious energy and that’s not humorous because you bulldoze the act and spoil the tone of the scene. Relax, let other performers have the spotlight. You don’t have to be in every scenario. Listen – don’t bulldoze and overpower others. Anxiety is nervous and not sure of itself, it roams around everywhere, attempts to do everything, please everyone, and it ends up having the opposite effect because it hinders the performance of the other performers to flourish. Calm is controlled, it exudes power, charisma and assurance. When you are calmer, you can be playful and ironic and your punchlines carry more weight. You listen to respond and not to strengthen your view. There were moments of calm and anxiety in the show. I understood the anxiety, entertaining a full house can be exhausting and emotionally draining. It was still a great show, light-hearted, filled with humor and completely unexpected. The show comprised off 6 acts. They improvised about chicken, boyfriend builders, being a little gay, earthworms and burning your mother’s tyre’s.

I loved the two sisters of Case Closed, Megan and Tash Casey. They had a lot of chemistry and complimented each other. They were quick witted, quirky and humorous. The girls of Mechanics of Chaos were simply outstanding! They stole the show, the audience couldn’t stop laughing, they were totally in sync, they complimented each other, they built on each other’s scenes, they listened and added to each other’s scenes, they stuck to performing the scenario the audience gave them; the boyfriend builder and they looked like they were having a lot of fun. I loved them because they were not searching for laughs, anxiety was not a factor, they were in the moment, they loved performing for the audience and it reflected with their performance. Shout-out Itu Chiloane, Mmasehume Raphiri, S’bahle (Sparkles) Hlophe, Sonia Mayor, Tafadzwa Chakanya, Unathi Shongwe and Zanele Sokatsha for a wonderful set. Shout-out to everybody, the gradient, the off cuts and thirst trap. Thank you Daphne Kuhn and the team for the whole experience. Yet another one from Bronwen and B-Sharp entertainment – thank you. Congratulations to The Assembly Improv show and a deserved standing ovation.

Goated

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Goated!

Goated, standing on the podium, I am number one, the gold is coated, you were never on my level, you tip the scale, you just bloated. Swaying public opinion on my side like a poll have you voted? Noted, I am the greatest, on top like the latest, fuck the world with no latex. I avoid texts, bluetick your ass like no tax but the flow is lax, loose like your girl and I am hitting from the back and I tell her relax. Your clique whack, you can never hit back, you on the sack, call you out individually and beat you by the pack. Shuffle you like a deck, crush you like an insect, I release doom on your ass and watch you fall by the sect. Whose next? I penetrated the game now who wants to fuck with the best? Your tactics are lame, just a couple of pests. Regurgitate your shit before I can ever digest. Permanent residence in this game while you just a guest. I am dominating and the world is my conquest. I’m goated, boats in my horizon cause I am coasted, bitches in my bed I never boasted. Smash and vacate, tomorrow another date, more bitches to bait, they need love and we just never hate. Baphomet, horns on my head and they spike, protected from threats like a dike, you come up against me and I’ll ride you like a bike, you lightweight like a kite. You talented – Sikes! You a joke, you make the mood light. This is my site, here’s an apple to bite, some legendary shit, you challenge to spite and I’ll beat your ass despite, cause I bring the pain and I go all night. Goated!

Sipho Hotstix Mabuse

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Sipho Hotstix Mabuse

Party on the square, I was at the opening of the Sipho Hotstix Mabuse concert. Memorable show, high octane energy, we were dancing all night. The show also commemorated music from legends like Hugh Masekela, Brenda Fassie and Stimela. The band were Jazzing, having fun, trying out new material, like the music they played that was inspired by the forceful removals in Sophiatown. It was Jazzy and evoked a feeling of nostalgia. I enjoyed that we had different horns in the ensemble. Horns show different textures, feelings and emotions, they have the ability to be reflective and evoke feelings of sorrow and rue like Miles Davis and John Coltrane on “Kind of blues”. Horns can make you reminisce about simpler times or strife in difficult times, to be optimistic like “Move on up” by Curtis Mayfield. Another song I loved by Sipho and the band was “Welcome”, a song dedicated to then ANC President Oliver Tambo. Speaking of Presidents, we had two former head of states in attendance in Thabo Mbeki and Kgalema Motlanthe. VIP – partying with very important people. Sipho Mabuse has an amazing, talented family and they helped him with the program. His son Biko is an amazing vocalist and is proficient with the guitar, he performed a piece of mezmarrizing music that had the audience spellbound. Sipho’s daughter, Nqobile, is a talented vocalist and she performed “Weekend Special” by Brenda Fassie among other songs. His nephew performed original music that he composed with the helped of Biko titled “Amor” – it is heartfelt and beautiful. All the performances were great, they were Jazzin, having a lot of fun, feeling it from within. We also had a musician who flew all the way from Mauritius who played a stringed Indian instrument. He played it with so much mastery, it blended in with the bass, keyboard and tempo, it was Jazz music like you have never heard before. It was different, it was glorious. I have a weakness for the electric guitar, that didn’t change today, the performer was outstanding – everyone was outstanding! From the drums guy, percussions, bass, keyboard and piano and Sipho himself. Everything about the day was perfect, it started off with an encounter with Job Kubatsi (Ntate Maphikela), the star of the hit show “The Suit”, returning for a second season in February and ended off with Ntambo Rapatla – Her mother’s savage daughter. I was with Sam throughout and Bronwen delivered yet another defense-splitting pass. Music for the Gods, endorsed by President Thabo Mbeki and President Kgalema Motlanthe. It was a party, the auditorium was merry, smiles tattooed on faces, all seats were vacated because everyone was on their feet dancing and singing along to the music, people documenting the experience through their phones taking selfies, time flew. Nobody wanted it to end, it was an amazing show. Congratulations Sipho Hotstix Mabuse and the whole team and a deserved standing ovation.

Michael Jackson

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Michael Jackson

I love Prince but Michael Jackson is the king of popular culture. That’s big, he defined an entire generation and transcended it for future generations. To this day, no one has had a bigger influence. Selling records was easy, literally the best selling artist of all time with sales of over 500 million worldwide. Inducted in the Rock n Roll hall of fame twice, the National Rhythm and Blues Hall of Fame, the Vocal Group Hall of Fame, the songwriters Hall of Fame and the Dance Hall of Fame. That’s not all, 15 Grammy Awards, 39 Guinness World Records and lauded as the most Successful Entertainer of all time, period. Over a four decade career, his world record music achievements and publicized public personal life made him a global figure. His songs, stages and fashion proliferated visual performance for singers in pop music. His innovations changed the music video as an art form and popularized street dance moves including the moonwalk and the anti-gravity lean. His mere presence would send fans tumbling on the floor in concerts without him doing anything. Before even the shows commenced, paramedics would be heavily staffed and working hard attending to fainting fans tumbling on the floor. Jackson himself would be just standing on the stage like a statue amidst the hysteria and fans screaming at the top of their lungs. He didn’t have to do anything to elict a response from the crowd, his aura was more than enough, it was God-like and when he did perform, you understood why he was hailed the king. My first experience of Michael Jackson was “You Rock My World”, it was paradigm altering, the video with Chris Tucker was the greatest thing ever! It was so cinematic and grand. The story-telling, the fight scenes, the music, the dancing, it blew me away! Hooked, transfixed and mezmarrized with just the first listen. It was a movie. “You Rock My World” was awe-inspiring. It was my standard for a while until I worked backwards and discovered “Thriller”. I love Prince but Michael Jackson is the king of popular culture, the greatest performer period and that’s not even hyperbole. I’d like to go on record and apologize, I was too excited, “Purple Rain” is not better than “Thriller”, they are both art, both exceptional, executed by two of the greatest artists of all time.

I was at the opening of the Micheal Jackson “History show” concert at the Lyric Theatre at Gold Reef City. The lyric theatre is beautiful, those chandeliers take my breath away. Everyone was infected by the spirit of Michael. Gloves, sunglasses and white shirts were the order of the day. Outstanding show, Showtime Australia delivers yet another masterclass. Garth Field is super talented. He is the reincarnation of Micheal Jackson. He has stage presence, his aura is commanding, he moves like Micheal, sings like him, dances like him, drips of the King of Pop – he is the king of pop. Thank you Bronwen for the invite. First Prince and now Micheal Jackson, you have made my year. Never in a million years did I think I’d see Michael on the stage but it happened and it was like a dream. It was glorious. Sam said I’d love this one and she was right. SamSays on the credits. I was excited for this one weeks prior, I mean Micheal Jackson, the greatest performer of all time – it’s not even hyperbole. Garth did Micheal justice. Everything was Micheal Jackson standard, the show was perfection. From the lighting, the band, the stage, the sets, electric guitarist, the costumes, backup singers, Nadine, dancing, singing and the cheography. The dancers on the stage were simply unstoppable! Unbelievable chemistry and high energy, in sync and well coordinated like a military drill. The electric guitarist is legendary, I loved the solos. Everyone was amazing! Now I have the experience of being in a Micheal Jackson concert and there’s nothing like it, it is glorious. Every hit was masterfully executed on the stage by Garth Field and the team, from “Bad”, “Beat It”, “Thriller”, Smooth criminal”, “Don’t stop till you get enough” “Black and White”, “The way you make me feel”, “Human Nature”, “Billie Jean”, “Earth song”, “Man in the mirror”, “Heal the world”, “Rock with you” “and many other classics. We also had Jackson 5 hits. Every performance was my favorite, Garth is incredible, he is Michael Jackson! It was a Rock and Roll day and once again guitars prevailed. The audience loved the performances, we couldn’t stop dancing and singing. I almost died with happiness when I saw the anti-gravity lean, I saw it live but I still couldn’t believe it. The moonwalk is still the most legendary dance move ever! Probably the greatest concert I’ve ever experienced. They left everything out on the stage. Maybe I wasn’t the greatest Michael Jackson fan but I am after today. Congratulations Showtime Australia and the whole team and a deserved standing ovation.

Long-term

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Long-term

The plan has always been long-term. You can have that bitch, she’s all yours and expedient, no long-term prospects like a deviant. I never minded missing a couple of parties, I was lenient, I don’t wanna be cool, I just am and you can believe that. I am the guy who goes on social media to diss social media. Cause what you gonna do? A lot of yall are like insurance brokers, you claim too much. We see the unhappiness in your eyes in all your pictures. Masquerading in falsehoods thinking it will affect your futures. Handling this post solo, I don’t need features. Your self-importance is a fairy-tale no one believes. No one really cares, it might be hard to conceive. You can take your fluke win, my insistence is on the league cause consistence is the key. I only play for the long haul and not just the long ball. I play to win forever and that’s just my call. The plan has always been long-term. I never lost sleep over what glimmers because I’ve always known I am a star. On top like the emperor of the Tsar. Constantly shinning and raising the bar. I am serving millions of people around the world like I said I would. I am international like I said I’d be. My words are helping people see. My presence unlocks all doors like a key. I am only going to get better and better. My influence is growing and my voice moves matter. They didn’t understand because their focus was fixed on the fleeting present that dissappears like an illusion. Instant gratification, a failed conclusion. They labeled me a loser and a failure cause I was broke chasing a dream. Cash rules everything around me, I am getting the cream. Blind to the vision because their lense was shortsighted and narrow. Nowadays, my words pierce the skin like an arrow. Time is the great neutralizer, my past efforts are bearing fruit and my dreams are finally coming true.

I am stronger, I am faster, I am smarter, I am the one. Ask your girl who can’t keep her hands off me because the charisma is fuming like carbon monoxide, gaseous killing them slowly with a smile. I am outside, danger when me and your girl lock eyes, cause I’ll take her and she’ll feed you lies. This was always the plan, patience and increasing worth like land. Your man is so bland, it’s so sad, so I kicked him out cause I am the leader of this band. Beyonce longevity, changing positions to sustain the activity, you were too impulsive like a kid with a tooth cavity. Finally a dick big enough to fuck up the world, no missionary, that’s boring, just a cautionary, on all fours so the bitch remains stationary. The plan has always been long-term, life-bearing and conclusive like sperm, vintage and timeless like a perm.

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The one

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The one

I am the one, fucking bitches, decimating pussy like a vaginal disease. I aim to please, going up against me will leave you exposed like a midget with no knees. You coming up short and you will never reach. My verse just blessed you and you didn’t have to sneeze. Flow fresh like Spring and the punchlines a breeze. Swag cold like heat and sure to make you freeze. You all talk like a girl on Tinder whose just a tease. Kicking down the door cause I don’t need the keys. Puffing out smoke cause I got the weed. Implanting words in your mind like a seed, to make you strong and grounded like a tree. My style buzzing like a bee, while you lactose intolerant and you never get the cream. I am living out my dream, making money, fucking honeys on a stream. One mention of me and niggas scream, cause I bring the horror like you wouldn’t believe. I am the one while niggas phony as a weave. Unavailable to all my haters like a leave. A crown on my head like a king, high notes when I am hitting it from the back, she can sing. At the highest on the podium cause all I do is win. All of you are secondary like the next of kin. I am the one, tempting nuns with a sin. Baptising the game with miracle water from my basin.

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Kyle Shepherd trio

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Kyle Shepherd trio

I was at the Wits Theatre for the launch of The Kyle Shepherd trio album. Unbelievable launch, musical intelligence, no wasted touch on the instrument. Every touch has a purpose. How you touch, how you grab, the duration, what you don’t do, all that has a purpose, it emits pitch and frequency. Don’t rush, play to your hearts content. Feel, communicate, speak your mind with music. Jazz music, feel the tempo, listen to the pulse, improvise, embody the glorious music. Music made for the Gods.Thank you for the invite Bridget. Always wanted to come to Wits so my first love, Performance arts led the way. The Wits Theatre is beautiful, absolutely gorgeous.

One of my favorite movies titled “Soul” by Pixar explores Jazz music, purpose and the flow state. The movie describes life as something you improvise, making up things along the way, breaking rules to rewrite your own – Jazzing. Joe Gardner is a substitute music teacher of a high school when one day gets the opportunity of a lifetime to audition to play for the Dorethea Williams band – his dream job. Excited he goes to the audition and does extremely well. While playing the piano, we see his fingers taking control of him, it is automatic like stepping up a gear. Completely on free-flow, we see him close his eyes and let his fingers and the music do all the talking, we see the room disappear and it’s just him and the piano, the end-result is that he plays the most mezmarising solo of all time, leading to Dorethea to give him the job on the spot.

The movie describes the “Flow state” as a space between the physical and the spiritual realm. This is because when you are in flow, you are in your own world, a world where you dictate everything, time disappears and nothing matters except for the task you are engaged with. When you are in flow, you are possessed by a creative demon that takes over everything. When you are in flow state, God reigns. That’s exactly what happened with the show. The musicians where in their own world, a world where music reigns. They were totally in sync and they didn’t even have to look at each other, pitch, tone, rhythm, fingers and sound spoke. They even closed their eyes, the music was beating from within. To touch, feel, emphatize, understand the keys of the piano, caress slowly and stike forcebly when the moment demands, to string the double-bass with intention to induce a trance and create a rhythm, to beat on the drums like a celebration of the devils death. The album is pure euphoria, beautiful and timeless like how real art should be, reminded me of Charles Mingus “Devil Blues”, “Devil Woman” but without the organs and horns, it had a strong classical influence like Ludovico Einaudi and Yiruma.

Kyle Shepherd is on Piano, Shane Cooper on Bass and Jonno Sweeman on drums – they are the definition of mastery. They have been playing together since 2008, touring the world together and it shows. They have chemistry, they compliment each other and they have a mental telepathy. They were Jazzing, improvising, in complete flow, having the time of their lives. They love what they do, the music was unbelievable, it was beautiful. Congratulations Kyle Shepherd and the whole team and a deserved standing ovation.

Kaza Kamba Pan African Theatre Festival II

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Kaza Kamba Pan African Theatre Festival II

The second day and the program was still on fire. We started the day with a Pan African workshop. Led by Zandi Radebe, we discussed what it meant to be African, how it extends to township life, how we relate to each other, the contrast in life pre-democracy and post-democracy, how we can be better as Africans and the morals and traditions lost along the way. The program explored the ideas of Marcus Garvey and what Pan-Africanism meant to him. In essence, it must start with me, then we before it can extend to us, to fill-up yourself first and then fill up the cups of others with the excess water overflowing from your cup. It was a thought-provoking workshop and ideas bounced. Participants in the audience shared their wisdom and ideas, we shared our perspectives and what “Pan African” meant to us. Then we arrived at my favorite part of the workshop, we discussed poetry and words with Lesego Rampolokeng. We talked about form, structures and types of poetry, how poetry is not necessarily a reflection of life because it hinders the perspective of the artist to experience but rather a distillation. Poetry is an expression of one’s intrinsic nature, it is an expression of individuation, if its truthful, it comes from inside and has a unique voice, not copy and paste from somebody else’s work, it has to be authentically you because you can’t be anybody else. We read and explored some of Lesego’s favorite authors and a member of the audience shared her poetry with the workshop to listen to. It was an interactive workshop and we got to get inside of the mind of a true wordsmith who explained all of his work comes from love. I was inspired by that remark because I understand. Although my work comes from multiple sources, love yes, but anger, spite, pain, sometimes hate and disappointment too, I transmute that to create my art. Maybe artists are a miserable bunch. To show, to feel, to distill life in word form, that’s poetry – it’s not about form or structure of language.

We ended the day with an excellent Zimbabwe play titled “Molly’s Street”. The play follows Molly who escapes child marriage and arrives in Chiredzi  southern Zimbabwe. Young and unskilled, Molly becomes a sex worker. Sadly, not long after her arrival her boyfriend murders her. Powerful show that depicts the perils of GBV. Rape, abortion, sex, violence and murder, it’s difficult to watch. We need to protect our girl children. The depiction of Molly’s life is unflinchingly raw and honest. The words are descriptive and emotive. A perfect blend of showing and telling. The show is dramatic and the performance out of this world. Zimbabwean actress Chidochangu Jo Anne Tenga inhabits the world of Molly. She inhabits her psychology, she feels the sensations of her world, understands her struggles, feels her pain, she is totally one with her spirit. The performance is inspired, pure excellence, an example of world class theatre. She is perfect with that performance, how she moves on the stage, her voice intonations, her facial expressions and the emotion in her words. Patrick Tenga compliments the story with sound effects and the general score of the play. He uses drums, percussions and strings. The end result is mezmarrizing theatre. The story is thought-provoking and reflects back socioeconomic factors plauging our communities, Hunger, poverty, aggression, pain, self-hate, hurt, toxic masculinity, GBV, prostitution, abortion, sex and a lack of role models to carve out a better path for coming generations. It’s an important story. Congratulations to Peter Churu for a great show and a deserved standing ovation.

Kaza Kamba Pan African Theatre Festival

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Kaza Kamba Pan African Theatre Festival

I was at Inaugural Kaza Kamza Pan African Theatre Festival, a workshop hosted by the Market Theatre, 14 – 17 November 2024. It is a workshop that commemorates and celebrated everything Africa. It explored the stories of African people, their heritage, their struggles, their art. It was a wonderful workshop, it was rich in its content, it is diverse and came from all over Africa, it is informative and in some cases down right heartbreaking. Europeans have never been our friends, it’s shocking how they colonized our people and weaponized the Bible to take everything from us. It’s unfair how their offsprings are getting richer from our resources while our people inherit poverty. They own the land where our people reside, rule over it, profit over it while they live in their own countries. The film “Skulls of my people” by Vincent Moloi broke my heart. It details the Namibian genocide that transpired from 1904-1907 by the Germans in which 110000 people were murdered pending an extermination order – the first colonized inspired genocide in history. Adolf Hitler studied and learned from the Namibian genocide to implement with the Halocaust. Over 80000 Herero people were murdered and over 20000 Nama people were murdered, some fleed to neighboring countries. They were hanged, shot, decapitated and butchered like swine. Their women were raped and forced to peel off the skins of their dead husband’s skulls so they can be shipped off to Germany for their art galleries and museums. Some 111 years later, the Germans recognise the genocide but won’t apologize and pay for reparations. To engage in dialogue was difficult, they are arrogant, they don’t feel remorseful for the pain of the Namibian people, they just don’t care. “Skulls of my people” seeks to get back the skulls of the Namibian people from the German people.

Not everything was gloomy, there was also a workshop about how stories are told in Botswana by Tefo Paya and Thabang Lelefe. The unique fusion of traditional sounds and rhythm with a modern contemporary voice. The workshop was intimate and powerful. We were in a semi-circle surrounding the two instructors. They are amazing artists, they showed us their crafts by embodying it, performing it, they brought their unique instruments along and shared how they were made, revealed the inspiration behind their works and chronicled life in Botswana. It was the perfect way to start off the program.

We ended off the first day with music by MoRa, one of the best concerts I have ever been to. Poet Lesego Rampolokeng is unbelievable. I am envious how he works his words, he is a wizard, a wordsmith, he is descriptive, creates imagery, rhymes, tells stories, critiques, wity and comical. He tells African stories, our stories about African people and the Jazz music is just exquisite. He is backed-up by an amazing ensemble, Drummer Tumi Mogorosi, Vocals, Cecilia Phetoe, Sibongile Mollo and Themba Maseko, Dalisu Ndlazi (Tuba) Lebogang Komane (Trumpet) and Gontse Makhene (Percussion). It was a satisfying way to end the day.

Beauty and the Beast

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Beauty and the Beast

Perfect show, a great theatrical experience. I loved everything about the show. It’s bursting with with imagination. It is grand, magical, energic, interactive, vibrant and refreshing. It is a show that has a lot of enthusiasm, from the diverse cast, the multiple sets that keep on changing, the costumes that transport you to that world, outstanding lighting, the amazing sound and sound effects, the singing, dancing and cheography, the rich story world and mesmerizing performers on the stage. It is so humorous and entertaining, I was hooked from the first moment to the last. The songs had the audience singing along. We even sang Shosholoza. The timeless story of “Beauty and the Beast” is revamped and given more color, it has a South African context, it has personality, it is memorable. Gavascon is my favorite character, he is brash, vain, narcissistic and has that Jonny Bravo “I am pretty” aura. The “macho, macho man”, it’s hard to be humble when you are perfect. But of course, he does give everyone indigestion, heartburn and stomach complications. Last infamous words of his first appearance, “They eating the dogs, they eating the cats”, I thought that was funny. The sound effect when the beast was talking, it was raucous and deep, he growled, he was thundering, he was menacing. The witch is really a witch. She flys on her broom, casts spells and has the most wicked laugh. She is diabolical, she shot the audience with her snort gun and turned the prince into a beast. I can’t believe her assistant ate her snort, proclaiming it’s protein. That was nasty. She really doesn’t give a damn about a bad reputation. Beauty is just refreshing and so beautiful. I loved the donkey, the movements, very donkeylike, comedic and talked a lot, reminded me Shrek. Mama (Fairy god mother) and Bonnyface are charming and relatable, very South African too, uses words in the South African lexicon, like kleva, Soweto and mfanawami. Mama is eccentric, she keeps watch over the story and makes sure everyone sticks to the script of the story. I Loved when Mama, Bonnyface, Beauty and the Dad performed the “friends” theme song. That was nostalgic. The 3 sisters are funny, whinny and an echo. It was great to see the beauty of the ballerina and the character with the bread on his head and torso was very peculiar. Not sure what he was. So I went to Sam and she clarified, Monsieur Brioche, a sweet French bread. Thank you so much Sam. SamSays on the credits. I loved everything about the show. The costumes, lighting and sets are truly epic. I can’t wait for Pinocchio next year, a real favorite of mine. Congratulations Janice Honeyman and the whole team for a great show and a deserved standing ovation.