Insignificant peasant, does he know how big my dick is, pipsqueak motherfucker, I should just whip it out, traumatize the little fucker, acquaint him with my boots for a while, he wouldn’t last a day in my shoes, I’ll crush him, pipsqueak motherfucker, I should let him fuck her.
I’ve been too kind, niggas don’t know what’s in the hidden, if they knew, they would tread lightly, it’s time I acquaint them with a real God.
10 inche motherfucker, it goes straight to your kidneys.
BDE fully activated, after I am done, it’s done, she won’t let me touch her.
Ruin her for humanity, who do you think you are, you not Superman, I am.
The emoji hearts you sending are pretty amusing, you are way above your depth, I am the greatest of all time, the biggest of all time and ready to party any time.
BDE activated, flaccid dick yours when you’re fully activated, it’s too big, it’s too wide, it won’t fit, such a big ego, pipsqueak you’re wasting my time, you not in my league, do you know how big my dick is?
Monsters lurk everywhere in the world and it’s hard to spot them. They have learned to camouflage themselves in the darkness, it engulfs and consumes them, blackening their souls turning them into shadows. Analytical Psychologist Carl Jung explains that human beings carry within themselves both elements of the good and bad, that we are both angels and demons, sick, demented, evil, dark, spoiled. Because we live in a world where we have to co-exist to survive, we surpress these undesirable qualities relegating them into the shadows. Unchecked the shadow can grow to consume our personality and rule our subconscious minds enabling us to act unconsciously. Our shadows can turn us into psychopaths who lack empathy and thrive on destruction. The shadow can enable the individual to be narcissistic, egoistic and maniacal. Shedding a light on our dark sides helps in controlling the shadow. Acknowledging you have a dark side keeps the shadow at bay. Life is a balance of both the good and bad, of the light and the darkness. We are both polar extremes of the same spectrum. You are a killer and a murderer, human nature says you are. You might find pleasure in murdering your brother in cold blood. Cain certainly did when he murdered his brother Able to spite God. The murder was premeditated, he felt no remorse, the action liberated him. I know I am bad, I am capable of savagery and genocide. I may even take pleasure in torturing and tormenting you to appease my dark side. Your suffering might even give me comfort. Am I another Jeffrey Dahmer? Would I drug you, strangle you to death, masterbate over your body, have sex with your unconscious body, dissect and sever your body parts, skin the flesh from your bones, cook and eat your body parts for dinner? The capacity for evil in a human being is unfathomable. Maybe I am not familiar with my own darkness. I don’t know what I might do to you in the right circumstances. The story of Jeffrey Dahmer haunts me because he did it time and time again. A serial killer with a death toll of 17. No one was safe, from boys aged 14 to adults aged 33. He butchered his victims, cut off their limbs, drilled holes in their skulls and injected hydrochloric acid, severed their heads and preserved them in the refrigerator, inserted the bones in the oven to burn them and then crushed them with his sledgehammer, he cut his victims into pieces and then boiled them, he cooked his victims and he ate them, he ate them! He used acid and other chemicals to burn the skin of his victims skulls to preserve them. He bleached the skulls and if they were too weak he pulverized them, some he kept and used when he was masterbating. He felt no remorse, it was a compulsion for him, he was conscious of his actions, he knew what he was doing, he wasn’t crazy or diagnosed with some sort of mental illness, he consciously experimented with his victims bodies in his own words to create zombies, he loved doing it, it was his vocation. I don’t want to believe that I am as wicked and evil as Dahmer but I know it’s possible. To deny this is to repress my own darkness and wickedness. To know I am capable of such darkness frightens me. I hope Jung and Freud have an answer for somebody like Dahmer. Maybe it is the ID out of control. Sigmund Freud explained that the ID is the seat of both the repressed material and the drives, to which had been added to the unconscious fantasies and unconscious feelings, notably guilt feelings. Expanding on this idea, Freud states that the mind is divided into 3; into what we call the ID, Ego and the Superego. The Superego is the watchful, judging, punishing agency in the individual. The ID is self-gratifying and amoral and the Ego is the middle ground of the two and strives to be moral. I don’t think Freud and Jung would understand an individual quite as complicated as Dahmer, to try and understand somebody like Dahmer is impossible. I mean he seduced and lured his victims to his place, drugged them, killed them, cut them and sat with the stench of their decomposing bodies. The smell was second nature to him. Sometimes psychology is not enough, perhaps this is a genetic thing, maybe his the exception in the family tree. When he was finally caught he didn’t resist, he was compliant and told the whole truth, every horrific detail, where he hid body parts, how many he had killed, the hearts, biceps, legs he ate, when the killing spree commenced – everything. He knew what he had done was evil and he asked for the death penalty that was not granted because it was banned in his State. He was accepting of who he was, he was not bothered, he was not haunted by ghosts and demons, he was not remorseful, he even had fans who corresponded with him in jail, fans who projected onto him their undesirable feelings, desires and fantasies and he reciprocated back that energy. Jeffrey Dahmer is your definitive example of a monster, he scares me. Maybe I am just scared of myself.
This is a 2am post. I couldn’t sleep. I am haunted. I hear voices in my head. That creative demon is possessing me again. Bringing this out in the world will make me feel better. It will enable me to sleep. I intend to post this. Well done Internet, you even have my most inner thoughts, you know me better than I know myself. I try to not identify with my ego because that’s not who I am. I don’t have to pick a side, I can actively choose to be a bystander, to just look and have no opinion. I am not what people say I am. I am not my mind. I am not my possessions. I am not my status. I am not my wealth. I am not the number of followers I have on my socials. I am not my past. I just am, alive, existence. So maybe you don’t know me Internet, because how can you? I am spontaneous. I don’t even know what I am going to do next, the future is uncertain and that’s the element I love the most. I try to be present all the time. The present is all we ever have, everything else is all just an illusion. So why not give the present moment everything you have? Afterall, there is no such thing as the future and the afterlife is a hoax. Time is a man-made concept and so is religion. Everything is all in your head. There is no such thing as time, everything is just what it is, everything is everything! Oh, Lauryn baby, I love that song, congratulations on the great album, I heard it went Diamond! “Miseducation of Lauryn Hill” is timeless like the structure of reality. But I digress. Even though I try to not identify too much with the ego, I have to. Simply because it holds my perceived identity and reality. It is my name, my family, my friends, my social class, my environment, my past, my future, my everything. For without my ego, without time, who am I? What am I? Do I even exist? I can’t just be life, I am being. The essence of being is meaning, a purpose and the ego provides that. This is the great comedy of life because I am something and nothing at the same time. Striking the balance between this nothingness and something is the key. Zen philosophy teaches this beautifully with its insistence on the middle ground, Hu Wei which translates to none doing, don’t force things, stream with what flows easily in life. Take the middle ground and flow. You can’t not do anything, that is a feeding ground for nihilistic thoughts and a unsustainable life. That is hell. Life has to mean something. You need to have meaning in your life even though it’s derived from an ego despite the fact that you are not your ego! Being present in the eternal now is everything because you are simply life, no different from the trees and lillies in your garden. This is what I mean when I say you are not your mind because it seeks meaning from the ego and the ego is generated from external phenomena. Yet you are at the same time, it’s confusing, what a paradox existence is, life is a dichotomy. You are not what the world says you are although lines might be blurred and you might think you are. You are simply life, something spontaneous the universe created. You are a living organism in its purest form, energy, an absolute miracle, the universe experiencing itself. We can’t talk about consciousness because we can’t account for it just like we don’t beat our hearts, it just happens to us. We need the ego to function in daily life because it provides labels that can help us navigate every day life. Being mindful of your thoughts is key to understanding this.
My dominating ego is that of the entrepreneur. Being an entrepreneur is philosophical for me. It is my mode of existence. I derive meaning from my entrepreneurial endeavors. It is what I am to the core. It’s what I did in the past, it’s what I do in the present and because I am a creature of habit it is what I will do in the future. I love entrepreneurship because because it allows me to give everything I have to the present moment. It’s in the things I do unconsciously, what I like subconsciously. It’s in my dominant personality trait. I read Hitler with an open mind and Toy Story makes me tear up. I am a creative who has told stories all his life. I worship all art forms and content is my life. I started doing poetry when I was 8 years old. I started doing ads for television when I was 9. At 10, I was in the school choir. At 12, I started selling sweets (fireballs) at school to raise money to buy myself a PSP (Playstation Portable) and I SUCCEEDED! In Highschool, I was a football coach that coached a team that went on to dominate the district. I did it with Kay, the team we started dominated Ekuruleni for two consecutive years, went undefeated for 3 years. Still in high school with my other friends, we created a cult in the form of a concert that lived on for many years after we had graduated. The entrepreneurial spirit is engraved within, again it is who I am to the core. I’ve always been self-sufficient, self-reliant and independent. I am open-minded, creative and I start things. I have the right energy. I create beautiful things. I am passionate. I question things. I am not scared of failure. I don’t live life with fear. Not even the Coronavirus at its peak affected me, I never wore a mask. Not because of my issues with authority but because I am a fucken hero, Mr. Entrepreneur, I risk it all, I risk life! And it was a lot of noise from the media, that’s when I knew I wasn’t going to oblige because they dish out fear to keep us enslaved and in line with an agenda. People are a product for the media and authority figures. Besides, you can’t tell me what to do. You can’t control me! I live, breathe, entrepreneurship. I gave my whole soul to the process. I sacrificed everything for the process, have been ridiculed and laughed at for the process. I have cried for the process. My character has been slandered for the process. I have lost friends and acquaintances for the process. I went to hospital for the process. I am willing to die for the process! And while I am not my ego, I am an entrepreneur, that’s my spirit, my soul, the one thing that has been a constant in my life, I am a creator, I am a creative! I am unemployable, I intimidate my employers, I am too good, I am too ambitious, I am a star, a five point pentagon that cannot fit in a square, a box. Mr. entrepreneur. My time is coming, I will rule, nothing can stop me. I am inevitable like death. This is destiny, it is what must happen. This is God’s plan. I have to replace the previous generation of entrepreneurs. Someday, I will be replaced too. It’s simply my turn to serve. Sorry Devil, I know all of your tricks, you can’t make me drift. In the end I’ll win because I am the best everyday of my life, Mr. Never Change, Mr. Consistency, Mr. Entrepreneur.
Monsters lurk everywhere in the world and it’s hard to spot them. They have learned to camouflage themselves in the darkness, it engulfs and consumes them, blackening their souls turning them into shadows. Analytical Psychologist Carl Jung explains that human beings carry within themselves both elements of the good and bad, that we are both angels and demons, sick, demented, evil, dark, spoiled. Because we live in a world where we have to co-exist to survive, we surpress these undesirable qualities relegating them into the shadows. Unchecked the shadow can grow to consume our personality and rule our subconscious minds enabling us to act unconsciously. Our shadows can turn us into psychopaths who lack empathy and thrive on destruction. The shadow can enable the individual to be narcissistic, egoistic and maniacal. Shedding a light on our dark sides helps in controlling the shadow. Acknowledging you have a dark side keeps the shadow at bay. Life is a balance of both the good and bad, of the light and the darkness. We are both polar extremes of the same spectrum. You are a killer and a murderer, human nature says you are. You might find pleasure in murdering your brother in cold blood. Cain certainly did when he murdered his brother Able to spite God. The murder was premeditated, he felt no remorse, the action liberated him. I know I am bad, I am capable of savagery and genocide. I may even take pleasure in torturing and tormenting you to appease my dark side. Your suffering might even give me comfort. Am I another Jeffrey Dahmer? Would I drug you, strangle you to death, masterbate over your body, have sex with your unconscious body, dissect and sever your body parts, skin the flesh from your bones, cook and eat your body parts for dinner? The capacity for evil in a human being is unfathomable. Maybe I am not familiar with my own darkness. I don’t know what I might do to you in the right circumstances. The story of Jeffrey Dahmer haunts me because he did it time and time again. A serial killer with a death toll of 17. No one was safe, from boys aged 14 to adults aged 33. He butchered his victims, cut off their limbs, drilled holes in their skulls and injected hydrochloric acid, severed their heads and preserved them in the refrigerator, inserted the bones in the oven to burn them and then crushed them with his sledgehammer, he cut his victims into pieces and then boiled them, he cooked his victims and he ate them, he ate them! He used acid and other chemicals to burn the skin of his victims skulls to preserve them. He bleached the skulls and if they were too weak he pulverized them, some he kept and used when he was masterbating. He felt no remorse, it was a compulsion for him, he was conscious of his actions, he knew what he was doing, he wasn’t crazy or diagnosed with some sort of mental illness, he consciously experimented with his victims bodies in his own words to create zombies, he loved doing it, it was his vocation. I don’t want to believe that I am as wicked and evil as Dahmer but I know it’s possible. To deny this is to repress my own darkness and wickedness. To know I am capable of such darkness frightens me. I hope Jung and Freud have an answer for somebody like Dahmer. Maybe it is the ID out of control. Sigmund Freud explained that the ID is the seat of both the repressed material and the drives, to which had been added to the unconscious fantasies and unconscious feelings, notably guilt feelings. Expanding on this idea, Freud states that the mind is divided into 3; into what we call the ID, Ego and the Superego. The Superego is the watchful, judging, punishing agency in the individual. The ID is self-gratifying and amoral and the Ego is the middle ground of the two and strives to be moral. I don’t think Freud and Jung would understand an individual quite as complicated as Dahmer, to try and understand somebody like Dahmer is impossible. I mean he seduced and lured his victims to his place, drugged them, killed them, cut them and sat with the stench of their decomposing bodies. The smell was second nature to him. Sometimes psychology is not enough, perhaps this is a genetic thing, maybe his the exception in the family tree. When he was finally caught he didn’t resist, he was compliant and told the whole truth, every horrific detail, where he hid body parts, how many he had killed, the hearts, biceps, legs he ate, when the killing spree commenced – everything. He knew what he had done was evil and he asked for the death penalty that was not granted because it was banned in his State. He was accepting of who he was, he was not bothered, he was not haunted by ghosts and demons, he was not remorseful, he even had fans who corresponded with him in jail, fans who projected onto him their undesirable feelings, desires and fantasies and he reciprocated back that energy. Jeffrey Dahmer is your definitive example of a monster, he scares me. Maybe I am just scared of myself.
I like Freuds work on the Superego. Basically the Superego is what regulates conduct, values and morality in a human being. The Superego is derived from society and the teachings from our parents. It serves to regulate order in the world. It’s the total opposite from the ID. The ID is self-indulgent, it is all about me and what I want and desire – to hell with everybody! The ID is unreasonable and greedy. The ID is undesirable, repressed and often unconscious. The middle between the Superego and the ID is the Ego. It decides what is the right course of action for the individual to take. The Ego gathers data from the Superego and the ID and finds a compromise. What manifests in the world is the Ego manifesting itself. This information is useful because we all a Superego, ID and ego. Having a Superego that is in line with society’s standards helps us navigate the world for it enables us to practice empathy with one another. A Superego makes us decent with one another and it is how we foster relationships with one another. However, it can also become a prison, locking you to the opinions of others. This is dangerous because you might lose your identity, attempting to please the people in your life. Regardless, the Superego is what is needed to navigate the world successfully, for it enables you to understand society and the world all around. Without the Superego you run the risk of becoming detached. This is risky because by nature man is a social creature, he needs social connections to find a mate and acquaintances who will help him in all spheres of life. Having a Superego that is morally aligned gives one factory settings in life.
The problem with the Superego is that it fosters a collective mindset. It fails to account for the individual. It keeps an individual at the bottom of Maslow’s pyramid of needs. It hinders the process of self-realization. To actualize you need the ID to stand up and say “No!”. The “No” must be backed up with reason and evidence. The “No” has to keep the customs of the world in mind, it has to account for the Superego and still rebel. This rebellious spirit is what will enable and individual to create his own path. This “No” must be akin to a lion’s roar. It must be prideful, affirmed, grounded and strong. In doing so, the individual will become a Lion. The Lion is something we must all aspire to become because it fully asserts its will. A Lion is the king of its life. It operates in the world with its conditions. The Lion is a big step to self-actualization. The Lion fosters in self-identity in the individual. The Lion makes the individual confident in his abilities. The Lion has a swagger about its walk, it has ingrained qualities that are immovable, it is assured and lives life on its own terms. Activating the Lion in you requires that you only say “No!” and mean it. It requires that you live your “No!”, it requires that you rid yourself of fears and others people’s opinions and judgments. It requires that you live life for yourself. Choosing to say “No!” unlocks a “Yes” for your mode of existence. This means “Yes” to your passions, “Yes” to your dreams and goals, “Yes” to everything you want to be! Saying “No” to your Superego gives the leverage to your ID. It gives your ID expression and fulfillment. It gives you an opportunity to be self-indulgent, an opportunity to know and master your true self, it gives you an open canvas to do as you please. Life is the accumulation of different stages, the Lion stage or the exploration of the ID must come after the Superego has been mastered. This enables sustainable development towards the journey of self-realization.
The natural progression of the Lion phase activates the last metamorphosis in the journey towards self-realization, that is one of the child. The child represents seeing for the first time. It represents the process of creation and novelty. It represents a genuine wonder at the world. To a child’s mindeye, everything is possible. This is the spirit that propels the individual towards the journey of self-realization and actualization. It is the spirit of creation. The natural tendency for man is to create hence Human “Being” entailing presence and becoming more than we are. “Being” is exerting yourself to the world. “Being” is striving to be more. “Being” is an action, it is consciousness and at a fundamental level it is creation itself. We lose this essence in the modern world because we get indoctrinated to man-made systems and adhere to conventional wisdom. In doing so we get identified with our Superego. And as we identify more with the Superego, we surpress the ID, scaling the power to the Superego, enabling the Ego to assume the dominant personality of the Superego. We are taught and programmed to lose ourselves, to abandon our individuality. The modern world teaches us to regress. To find the childlike spirit in your soul, you have to find your passions again, to connect with them, you have to follow what makes your eyes glisten, what makes them shine, you need to adopt your own values and have a deep appreciation for life. You need to live with constant gratitude for life. You need to sway away from the majority and their customs. You need to look at the world with novelty, bewilderment and awe. You need to find yourself again. The spirit of the child is what makes life worthwhile. It is positive energy and calibrates at a high vibration frequency. It is self-sustaining. It enriches your spirit. The spirit of the child is the only way to Self-actualize. Find your inner child voice and let it consume everything you do. This will keep you young, nourish your soul and will give your life meaning. Your true self is the inner child.
antakalipa 