Spiteful bitch you made me stronger. I am laughing because you thought my back was against the wall but I couldn’t be more stronger. Should have believed you when you spewed hate against me but I was younger, vulnerable, confused, looking for your validation, when your heart was on vacation. You didn’t care, left me abandoned like a building occupied by drug addicts. Maybe I was an addict, craving for your love, that was never given. Instead you played the victim, when you are the one who opened your legs for that big dick. Should have wore a condom and avoided the leak from that big prick. What dreams? Don’t make me sick. Spiteful bitch you made me stronger, overplayed your hand, using the same maneuver, you became predictable, thought you were my God, how predictable. Searching for my weaknesses with a microscope so you can use them against me, weaponizing food to get at me. The presence of mind to know what works on you like Cain when he killed Able to spite God. Will never forget the schadenfreude on your face when I lost weight, it was your doing, you caused my fate. Not anymore it ain’t, will never give you that power because you are insane. Spiteful bitch you made me stronger, because of you I stand stronger. Will never let anyone play me like a fiddle, picking sides, nah, I’d rather stay in the middle. Acting big when you really are just little. Petty, prideful, egotistical, pointing fingers and sitting on the stands but never getting physical. You are right and everybody is wrong, how’s that for nonsensical? Control freak, power hungry, always has to be the one who speaks. Spiteful bitch, I believe you, you are clearly a cunt. Staying in role, you are even spiteful as a aunt. Hateful demeanor, stirring trouble, using people as pawns for your personal amusement. Everything is just a game to you isn’t it? Some sort of entertainment. Mine, mine, mine, it’s a sign, sign, sign of your immaturity and spiteful nature. Take it all, you spiteful bitch! We done! Spiteful bitch, you made me stronger.
One day I hope to have the right amount of sensitivity, experience, finesse and creativity to execute a song like Cherry Wine. I can safely say it’s my favorite song of all time by miles. It’s the song that made to go to the music store to purchase that “Life Is Good” album. Yes, the album was hyped up and I loved the two singles, “Daughters” produced by No I.D and Summer on Smash produced by Swizz Beats but I didn’t make the decision as of yet to purchase the album. Then one day, I came home from school and the music channel was debuting “Cherry Wine”, so I gazed onto the TV screen and was transported to pure music heaven, the song paralyzed me and I was in awe, “wow”, I thought. I knew that my life would be altered forever, I mean it was Nas and Amy Winehouse – Salaam Remi on the credits. To this day Amy Winehouse is still my favorite artist. I watched that “Cherry Wine” video and I fell in love. It’s so hypnotic and Nas is so thoughtful, expressive and articulate. He makes you reminisce about the past while being hopeful of the future, while Amy is dreaming out loud, her mind drifting on top of clouds and she’s yearning for this man who is just like her to come take her away, she feels alone, she feels vulnerable, it’s sad, it’s moving, it’s meaningful, it’s poetry, it’s life, it’s art. The beat, the horns, the verses and Amy’s vocals, it’s just a beautiful song – perfect! I was a bit sentimental because Amy Winehouse had past on a couple of months prior and “Cherry Wine” was her last song and it was with Nas! Nas is amazing! I wish I could write a song like that. After I watched that video, I downloaded the song and it was actually better than the video – the video was shortened but on the mp3 Amy goes on and makes the song her own. “Cherry Wine” changed things for me, I bought the “Life Is Good” album. The album is one of the best CDs I’ve ever bought. “Life is good” is a masterpiece, a certified Nas classic, I love it, one of my favorite hip-hop albums of all time. The first CD I have ever bought was “God’s Son” by Nas. Also a classic, had songs like “Get Down”, “I Can”, Dance” and “Heaven”, yea that was a great album. Illmatic is unbelievable! Still if I had just one wish, I’d wish to create a song like “Cherry Wine”. I want the mood, the aesthetics, the Jazz sound and melodies, the feel and an artist as talented as Amy Winehouse to take center stage. I would also talk about Love and what I want in a woman. Like Nas, I’d give Amy the space to make that song hers. I’d also name my song “Cherry Wine”, that’s my dream. I know creating content like “Cherry Wine” is difficult, Nas suffered through divorce to make it happen. That’s the beauty of “Life Is Good”, it’s so personal. I am open to endure suffering to create great art. One day when I have the resources and talent, I am going to create all of this and it’s going to be the most awesome thing ever!
Yea, Nas is my favorite rapper. He made things easy for me with King’s Disease, KD2, Magic and KD3. Shout-out to Hit-boy for producing all of those Classics. He is still Escobar, Nasty Nas, he hasn’t switched up, he is still Nas! His flow, rhymes, storytelling and word play is of the highest quality. The longevity under his belt unbelievable, 30 years at the top and he is still hungry for more. He is a living legend. He was never something he was not, he didn’t appease the culture, he never dumbed down, he was just Nas. I respect that, I admire that. He is a shinning light. He inspires me.
On the epic song by Jay-Z and Kanye West “No Church in the world”, Kanye West points out that love is ruined by monogamy. This is an interesting sentiment, one that disputes the validity of a marriage institute. Marriage is an institution created by the church to unite people who love each other romantically. It wasn’t always like this, to get married because of emotions and feelings would be considered an obscenity in the good old days of the past. People got married for reasons that were practical economically, they joined to unite fortunes and establish a powerbase. Marriage was a legal binding entity used to preserve wealth among families. It was not a measure of one’s love and dedication. However, going forward things changed with the entrance of the romantics. They affected and changed culture in a big way. Writers and poets started making an art form of this phenomena known as love. It was contagious and spread all over the world. De Beers located a diamond mine in South Africa but since diamonds had no value, they created value through the visuals of Hollywood movies and ads on billboards and newspapers – it was a frenzy, diamonds were everywhere, on printed media, billboards, television, in music and referenced by poets. Diamonds were made desirable. They were made valuable. They now demonstrated the love you had for your partner. Culture derived, formulated and concluded that your engagement ring should be worth at least 3 months of your paycheck. It was a madhouse and everyone was in the delirium. For their efforts, De Beers made riches and they continue to own the diamond market in the world. Their success is attributed to the romantic age. The romantic age contained an impractical people. Indoctrinated in the constitution of the church, they believed in monogamy that is one partner for one man. The Romantics added to that and proclaimed that this partner should complete and fulfill you. The romantics United love and sex. The romantics were irrational, deluded and impractical. An institution that unites love and sex is flawed simply because sex is a form of expression. Sex is gratifying a desire. Sex is individuality. Sex procreates. It is possible to love you and not be sexually attracted to you. In the same way that I can have a mistress that I have sexual relations with and not love. In fact, it is the norm in our culture. We see this on books like “The Great Gatsby” with the characters of Tom Buchanan, Daisy, Tom’s mistress and Gatsby. Dispite his known infidelity, Tom goes back home to Daisy. We see this with Daisy too, she has an affair with Gatsby and later goes back to Tom. For Tom, Daisy represents stability, his heart and it is the same with Daisy. Their infidelities don’t mean that they don’t love each other. This is also exhibited on the 1974 movie “Emmanuelle”, where Emmanuelle’s partner doesn’t marry her for mere possession, he marries her because he loves her. He encourages her to explore her sexual desires and fantasies with other people besides him, citing “You not my beauty, not my property”. All that he asks for in the relationship is transparency and honesty. For them communication and trust is vitally important. They understand that love and sex can be separate. This makes the bond they have for one another strong. For love is patient and understanding. Love is practicality and reason. Love is not vain and shallow. It is not narcissistic entitlements and pride. Love operates at a positive wavelength. It calibrates at a high conscious level. Love is the default language of the world. Love is life.
Maybe there’s wisdom in monogamy for it creates a world of order in your life. Monogamy is stable and often reliable. It fosters closer relations in the family. Monogamy is warm, stable and secure. It makes life meaningful for we can raise our children and our grandchildren and die gracefully. Monogamy is consistent and always there for you. At least that’s what it promises on paper. The salesman who’s selling us on the idea of marriage is a great one because we still go into marriage head first dispite the staggering divorce rates. The odds of a divorce are 1 in 2, that’s 50% – that means either you or a friend is getting a divorce. This is because of the unrealistic promises of romanticism. I can’t be your everything. I can’t fill the void in your heart or complete you. I am not your savior. We can’t unite love and animal sex in our relationship, we can do it for a while but don’t expect it to last forever. Reason being is that I am flawed. I am a human being and I have my days were I am not at my best. Sometimes my actions are repulsive, bad natured and suspect. I have deep rooted insecurities. I am a horrible person but I try my best to be presentable. I am repressed and I will exhibit undesirable behavior. I am a mess and untidy. Sometimes I will get defensive and angry. I am narcissistic. I have a big ego. I am imperfect. I am a born sinner. With that said, let’s create a love that will be accomodative and sustaining for someone like me. I don’t believe in forever because I live in a vacuum of time and space. So let’s create something practical and usable. What is the reason of our union? Is it for protection and wealth, is it for a partnership, is it for cohabitation, is it to start and raise a family, is it the sex, is it because you love me and want to be with me forever and ever? Let’s discuss this and put it in the world. Let’s discuss how we can make provisions for our inadequacies. Let’s come to an agreement that will suit me and you. Let’s make our love objective and with a criteria, it will help regulate our actions and we will never take each other for granted.
In his comedy special, comedian Kevin Hart explores the difference between new relationships and relationships that have gone the long mile. He explains that he hates new relationships because everything is fake and we are in a continual process to impress our partner. He states that we are willing to do anything to prove we are the right person, that we regulate our impulses and emotions, that we are overly generous with everything including sharing food off our plates on our dates – despite the fact that we don’t like sharing food. He contrasts this with old relationships, where the couple are highly familiar with each other. He makes a joke stating that if that couple went inside a shop and the one person came out with snacks and the other one came out with Juice and the one with the snacks asked the one with the juice for a sip, the person with the juice would be outraged. That he wouldn’t share his juice and it would be the topic of the whole day. Mileage on relationships reveals people’s true nature and character is the aim of this joke. Urban Poet Kanye West, explores this on songs “Paranoid” and “RoboCop” in the awesome 2008 album “808’s and Heartbreaks”. Kanye talks about a girl who completely changes on her, she’s irrational, lacks trust and overly paranoid. This paranoia creates in her a RoboCop, whose constantly surveiling Kanye hoping to get evidence. The idea here is that the romantics version of love can make you crazy. Simply because it’s built on possession, ownership and entitlement to a person. The romantics love is the same as slave trading. It is a demon that needs to be exorcised from culture. We need a new kind of love. One that is intelligent, practical, reasonable and life affirming. Generally, there are 3 stages of love. First is the infatuation stage, where everything about our love object is perfect. We just can’t get enough of that person. The relationship is new and burning with desire. Sex is a constant and we just can’t keep our hands of each other. The duration of this stage is anywhere between a year to 3 years. Then we have the second stage. In this phase, the couple start the process of knowing each other. This stage is the fruit of the infatuation phase.
It is the most rewarding phase as it fosters closer relations. It fosters intimacy and spirituality. It is liberating. It is fulfilling. The 3rd stage is the accumulation of the 1st and 2nd phases. It is the limit. A place where everything dies. This is because everything has been established. Behaviors are now habits and novelty ceases to exist. You know everything about your partner and she knows everything about you. It can even be said that she knows you better than you know yourself. This is the natural order of all relationships. Unless, you can bring it back to the first step (infatuation phase) it will die. Hence, redefining yourself and creating relationship goals is key. It will keep the fire burning and enhance new qualities you didn’t know existed in you. It will generate a sense of wonder in the relationship. It will make your partner fall in love with you all over again. It will keep your relationship youthful and exciting. Relationship goals are key because at this point in the relationship you are one, a unit, a pair and as such a third entity has been created. This third entity is the love you have for each other and it has to grow, it has to self-realize. This third entity is a energy that needs to grow and expand. It needs fuel like how your body needs food. It needs love and support. It needs continual growth. Relationship goals or mutual goals are what will propel the relationship forward. It will refresh things in the relationship. It will refresh the stages or phases in the relationship. This is because goals require specialized focus and attention. It activates traits and talents you didn’t know existed in you. Goals are challenging and hard. Goals require a lot of work. This is what will keep your relationship flourishing.
Alternatively, we could just have a 5 year lease on love and marriage. Nothing in life is certain, especially the union of two individuals. This is because of cultural differences and our perceptions of the world. Our history and past makes us distinct from one another. We have different intentions and plans. Life is a process that keeps unfolding and developing. Evolution is constantly evolving and expanding. Change is eminent. Marriage as forever is a hoax like the moonlandings. We need to be able to adapt to new environments and ultimately conquer only to move on to newer pastures. A 5 year lease on marriage is active, it is progressive and will provide different perspectives. A 5 year lease on relationships and marriage provides us with freedom to live life on our terms. We will never take our partners for granted. Our lives will be filled with novelty and we will grow and become all that we can be. But maybe the state won’t allow that, to that I propose empathy and understanding for our partners. I propose patience and a light view of the world. I propose we treat our partners like we do our children. This is because, we are all children at heart. Maybe we forgot that we are children because the world is so harsh and doesn’t condone childish behaviors. The word “childish” has become an insult, a smear campaign on one’s character and conduct, a terrible disaster. However, it doesn’t have to be that way. Consider for a minute how we treat our children. We are more emphatic, we are understanding and we are patient with them. This comes from the fact they are young, small, vulnerable and don’t know any better. We think it’s cute when they make blunders and we laugh. We are gentle. We are considerate and love them unconditionally. That is something we must adopt in our relationships. We should treat our partners like children. They are children at heart and also don’t know any better, in fact no one does. We are all lost in need of guidance, love and assurance. We should adopt the the action of giving and not expecting anything from our partners. Give with a pure heart. Give everything you have. This action will give longevity in the relationships in your life. You will be a better human being because you will be more empathic. People will seek refuge in your hands. If you treat your partner and the people all around you like children, you will see the light side of life and will laugh when life issues you a challenge. You will love yourself more. You will be strong and affirmed.
In 1998, critically acclaimed artist, the queen Lauryn Hill released an album titled “The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill”, it was lauded by critics and won Album of the year at the grammys. The album explores the subject of love. It is the most important music album ever created and is what love sounds likes. It covers, self-love, self-worth, self-identity, romantic love, family love, destiny, law of attraction, self-actualization, self-realization, ambition, Taoism, the human spirit or soul and happiness. It is an amazing album, unrivaled in any genre of music. The album is enlightened. It is an album that has the capability of changing your life in just one listen. It is an album that calibrated at an high energy level. It is natural and free. To add to the texture of the album, Lauryn Hill got kids to talk and discuss the subject of love. These kids give their insights on what they think love is – on what love means to them. That makes the album sound so special. It is heart-warming. You will never find a better album on love than this one, I promise you – it’s impossible. I encourage you to take a listen.
antakalipa 