A man who has money is beauty for women just like how men look for beauty in women. Granted you wouldn’t marry a woman for her beauty but it sure helps. Money is attractive, money is intoxicating, it has the promise of fulfilling all your dreams. Visions of not having to struggle anymore, gracing balls wearing designer clothes burdened with sparkling diamonds that hang on your neck and wrists, driven in luxury and escorted by royalty. Which girl wouldn’t want to be Cinderella for a lifetime? This time the magic doesn’t dissipate, the clock keeps ticking, the fairy godmother on speed dial and the glass shoes keep on multiplying. Living in Mansions, walking on marble, oversighted by crystal chandeliers, swimming in heated pools and served by foreign butlers. There enters the Gold digger, the manifestation of every man’s fantasy. She represents a tunnel in the repressed subconscious mind. She fulfills you in every way you desire. She subjegates herself to you, granting you power. She soothes and fills what’s lacking in your life. She is your escape in a world were routine triumphs. She is exciting, new and forbidden, uses her body to make you yield into the temptation of her bosom. You can squeeze if you want to, that’s the whole point. She’s yours for a price. The esteem and prestige of being your wife, but no prenups. Also, she wants to be included in your will, a stake in the inheritance fund and half of everything you own and oh, she’ll get it all. Her cunning intelligence guarantees it. You are her gold mine and she’s not letting go. Unlike the typical woman who operates with the right hemisphere of her brain, she is a blend of both hemispheres, she is both feminine and masculine. She is not just a woman whose emotional and acts on her feelings, she thinks, she plans, uses reason and logic, she has drive, she is ambitious! You are the route to her Gucci and Louis Vuitton bags, bespoke designer clothes, red bottoms heels and summer vacations in Monaco.
It was difficult to defend against the Blitzkrieg attack because it enveloped the enemy and crushed it with great speed. It gave you no time to think, no space to move, you were crushed by the weight of the attack. The perfect gold digger is akin to a blitzkrieg attack. You’ll never see it coming, she will crush you and dispose of you faster than the speed of light. Great gold diggers will seduce you, play to the repressed qualities of your being, ascentuate their body features, lower the pitch of their voices, play the demsel in distress, regress to a childlike persona, dominate through passivity to sink their claws in, marry you for your money and then divorce you. They are the definition of deception and smokescreens, they disappear like an illusion, like a dream, like it never happened. After you it’s on to the next one. You have to admire gold diggers because they are ambitious, they are driven, they have will, they want a good life and you are a means to an end. Gold diggers have balls, what makes them great is their ability to tap into their masculine sides while maintaining their femininity. That ambition will get you everything in life. I would love to be a Hugh Hefner, a magnet for gold diggers. To be surrounded by young, hot, beautiful women and have the relationships be platonic and transactional, using my pool and walking around the house in nothing but their birthday suits, oh Hugh cracked the code, the Playboy Mansion is heaven!
In our modern world the word power seems to make people uncomfortable, it has negative connotations of greed, evil and corruption. It is undesirable and dirty and no one seems to want to admit to the world that they want power. We like to convince people and ourselves that we are saintly and good individuals who care for the well-being of others. We imagine that we are pure and we would never hurt or kill another person in cold blood, that it is always the other person who is the aggressor and not us. We deceive ourselves and repress this urge for power relegating it into the shadows. The truth is that everybody wants power. The world is one big power struggle, the clash of egos combating to be the alpha. Dominance, it keeps our blood boiling and we hunger for it like a starved prisoner. Standing over your body makes me feel good. I yearn to make you submit to my will and my point of view. Power is everything, it is control and persuasion. It sucks to not be able to persuade anybody, it makes you feel weak and not in control of the situation. You feel like a bystander, a passenger moving along with the wind blowing you away in every direction. It makes you feel like a victim of life. Power puts you in control, you become a creator, a God. A God, that’s what everybody secretly yearns to be. To have undisputed power and influence over everything and everyone. In pursuit of this untold power, life creates a Hitler and a Stalin. Because If God is a fabrication of the mind created to derive meaning in an absurd world then maybe I can fill that gap, I can be God and control peoples perception of reality. He won’t intervene because his not real, I am God now and I will prove it by starting Wars and conquering other nations. All is power and that’s the motivation for serial killers, to kill, plain and simple. Jeffery Dahmer murdered people for the power it gave him, it gave him a rush, it was intoxicating, he felt powerful knowing he separated your spirit from your body. He kept souvenirs, his victims skulls, skeletons and took pictures of the severed body parts to remind himself of the power he had over you. It was the same with Charles Manson, he had the power of persuasion, he recruited young girls to his cult and convinced them to commit horrendous crimes. If I live in your mind, I can convince you to slit somebody’s throat from ear to ear and that’s what Manson had, permanent residence in these girls minds, they revered him, going so far as calling him Jesus. Power is possession, it is psychological, it is forceful, it is desirable. If I have power over you, I can do whatever I like. The denial of the desirability of power leads to slavery because the shadow has taken control of you, your undesirable impulses and urges needs an outlet and so you disregard my right to life as a human being to justify your repressions, so you humiliate me, break me down, vilify me to feed the beast that has taken control of you. You don’t even feel bad about it because you are a good church going Christian who believes in community and doing the right thing.
Power, you have to be aware of the laws to get to the pinnacle. The victims of Jeffery Dahmer had one thing in common – they took the free lunch. Maybe Dahmer was charming and charismatic, it would certainly explain how he lured them to his place, but if someone offers you a big paycheck for something menial then that’s a red flag because they are after your soul. That’s how Harvey Weinstein comes into the picture. “Suck my dick and you will get the part. Come on, every young actress sucked dick to get to the top”. You suck his dick and there’s no coming back, his got power over you. He lives in your head rent-free. Worse is that you need this, you a nobody and his a Billionaire who controls Hollywood. What you gonna do? It’s easy to despise the free lunch when you are not hungry. If you depend upon your own arms, you stay hungry for a while maybe for a long time but you have your power and it accumulates. Who knows, maybe in a couple of years you become a big player in the game. Power, you need to delay gratification to attain it. Sucking executives dicks will only make you a pawn. Elizabeth Holmes played the game of power beautifully. She was charismatic and magnetic. Used theatricalies and fed peoples need to believe. She modeled herself after her hero Steve Jobs by embodying his spirit. She wore the type of clothes Steve Jobs wore, copied his mannerisms and how he used to present his products to the world. Investors thought that she was the next Steve Jobs, they saw Steve Jobs reincarnated. They gave her millions for her company. They fell in love with her. She graced the covers of top magazines like Forbes and Fortune. She was labeled a genius and an innovator despite the fact that she hadn’t produced anything revolutionary. Everyone mistook appearances for reality. Her company Theranos was a hoax. She deceived everyone to get to the very top, meeting world leaders and presidents in the process.
Like on The Godfather, power like war is deception, never let anyone know what you are thinking and you hold all the cards. That’s where Santino Corleone got it wrong, by revealing what he thought he compromised the family, he showed Sollozzo that the Corleone family were not united in the decision to not operate in the narcotics business and Barzini took advantage. Power is double standards and smoke screens and Barzini played the game beautifully by keeping his hands clean and getting Sollozzo and Tattaglia to do the job for him while he sat on the sidelines and pulled the strings. Santinos mistake nearly cost the family everything, it was through the grace of God that Don Vito Corleone survived that hit. Power is getting people to play the cards that you deal. Power is cunning and deceitful. Power is concealing your intentions, like Heyman Roth pretending to be an alliance for Micheal Corloene while at the same time plotting his death. Power is crushing your enemy totally like when Michael Corloene assassinated the heads of the five criminal bosses all at once to cement his power at the helm. Power is power, it deserves its negative connotations.
She told me she loved me and at that moment I was trapped because I was only interested in what was between her thighs. I felt it was a premeditated move consciously executed to land her man. She is vindictive and this is a ploy to possess all of me like a prisoner, a slave. That is what love is all about, control over the other person. Love is strategic ploy to weaken and exploit. Love is a flanking maneuver that surprises and hurts the opposition. Love is tact to make somebody vulnerable, a blow that makes a soldier reeling and a poison that kills without medical assistance. Love is war, deadly and compromising. I resent the notion that we were made of gold and sunshine. That is not what a human being is at all because like Nietzsche once stated, even good actions are sublimated evil ones. She showed her hand too soon. It was rash, impulsive, expedient and unsedective. Still, I had to be careful because I knew where that blurt came from. It was truthful expression on her side, her shadow and it came from a fabricated reality. All of her life she has been chasing the idea of love. She loved the idea of somebody completing her. She loved the idea of somebody instinctively knowing her thoughts and how she felt. The culture of romanticism had consumed all of her being. She was impractical living in a world where she chased novelty after novelty. She had a low self-esteem and confidence. Maybe, it was because she had been hurt before. Maybe, it hurt her to the core that it dismantled her self-worth and identity. Maybe this is delicate and sensitive. It could be me, something about my childhood and how I was raised. It could be that I had a narcissistic mother who never gave me much attention and that I am scared of being abandoned and so I do it to others before they do it to me. Maybe I am a written-off vehicle, completely wrecked and damaged. Still, I had to answer or run the risk of dead air taking over. I responded “I love you squared.” It sounded vague and contained possibilities. It sounded like an illusion. It hinted at loving you more but meant nothing like that. It was an exceptional counter-attacking move, one with precision and amazing creativity. The answer had to be great too, if I had any chance of being between her thighs. See, it was a mission of mine, a dream – her thighs were like a gateway to heaven, to paradise. I felt like a jackhammer anticipating to be used. A bomb on countdown awaiting to explode, figuratively and literally in her. Her body excited my middleman and love had nothing to do with it. What I felt was merely physical. A longing to express my desires on her. She represented an object to gratify my sexual urges. Besides being an object, she meant nothing to me. I resent the fact that she would tell me that she loves me when I was trying to climb, to be the best. I am young, black, gifted and amazing and she is trying to cling on to me, to lay claim and preserve like vegetables in the refrigerator. I am not a possession, I am not a vegetable in someone’s refrigerator – I belong to the world and any woman who inquires. Am I a bad person? Sure, but she’s the hypocrite and the liar, camouflaging herself to the exterior of love when she doesn’t know my intrinsic value. How can you claim to love someone you barely know? This is just the duality of life, the realization that we mean different things to different people. The realization that we are a coin toss and fittingly, theres a third side to a coin, the side that gives the coin its duality. She is wrong for loving me so abruptly. After all, would she love me if the word “love” didn’t exist? Highly unlikely, she would have requested a signature to my death warrant. So yes, sure I am an exceptional human being. At least she knows what I want. There’s a big bullseye sign between her legs and I want to be the nail that gets hammered in repeatedly. I wish to penetrate through the curtains of life. I am interested in the energy force that propelled humanity forward in our long ancestry line. Her personality is of little relevance to me; I am only interested in what is between her thighs. Personality depends upon the environment and culture, it is not reliable to be considered as critera. I wish she could detach from her body, it would be ideal. But since that’s an impossibility, I have to be patient with her. By professing her love to me, in my hands I have her vanity and ego; I can make her do anything that I want. She is eager to impress. While I don’t consider her a serious project, I do see her as an adequate mistress, somebody there when called upon to gratify my urges. Alternatively, we could fuck just one more time then she’ll be somebody that I used to know. But why limit yourself?
They are Barzinin’ you, watch out for the traitors! How do you know if you have good friends? That’s difficult considering the structure of reality. Defining reality is difficult and complicated because we reside in an ocean of phenomena that we don’t know nor understand. Like consciousness, we don’t know what it is, where it is located and how we can account for it. We also have cognitive biases that our minds can’t control. Which leads to the question. Are we in control of our actions or just a program dictated by socio-economic factors, peers and family? Are our thoughts, really our thoughts? Are we the autonomous creatures we would like to think of ourselves? The truth is that we are a byproduct of our ancestors, a continuation of the human thread, the progression of evolution. As such we have evolved to be in sync with our environment to survive. Being in sync with the environment and nature helped with food, this is important because food helps with the survival of a species. Being in sync with the environment helped us recognize patterns around all nature. It helped us create order in a world overwhelmed with chaos. It helped create structures. It helped create time, time is a man-made construction. It helped us predict cycles so we could perfect models like agriculture which was the heart of the industrial revolution. This evidence strongly suggests that we are a product of our environment. It does not only hold true for human beings, this is exhibited in all the ecosystems of the animal kingdom. Harsh conditions makes it impossible for life to flourish, it is for that reason that grass doesn’t grow in the dessert, however we do have life in the dessert. Life that flourishes in the dessert has adapted to the conditions and internalized its surroundings. For the evolution of the species, it was do or die, it is at the mercy of its environment to make it. This makes sense because if nuclear hits the planet, it would be difficult for any life to flourish. We are our environment, our socio-economic status, our friends and families. You can make the claim that even our ideas and thoughts are not our own. We are influenced by everything all around us, the books we read, the media, our peers, families and even our ancestors. Everything about us, we are taught by the culture all around us. Everything is stored by the subconscious mind and it further runs a program of our lives based on the data that it receives. The data, your thoughts become your reality. And so, it makes sense to be in an environment that is sustainable to your growth. It makes sense to be around people who are like-minded, that will help you reach your destination faster, it will help with the program of your life. It makes sense to be around good friends and family members. By nature man is gregarious, meaning that he has always relied on others to survive and thrive. The saying “no man is an Island” holds true because we need the assistance of others to progress in the hierarchical world, we need other people to assist in regards to finding a mate to construct a future with or at the bare minimal to reproduce to sustain the legacy, to sustain life. We can’t choose our family but at least we can choose our friends and mates. Choosing the right partner and friends is the most important decision of your life, it is literally the difference between a good life and a horrid existence – it has the power to define your whole life and the trajectory to which it moves. Life is characterized by the company we keep, our environment, dominant thoughts, the culture we were born into and our conceptions about the structure of reality. With that said, how do you know if you have a good friend?
This is difficult to assess because by nature human beings are very deceptive creatures, we lie, get jealous, kill and camouflage ourselves to be well-liked or gain positions of power. True power is not rising to the top with an iron fist, or deceit or propaganda, its truthful collaboration with others with the intent of finding a common ground. This is the essence of sales, this is the fundamental law of the business of life. Of course, that’s not how things operate because all of life is full of deception. Lions hide in the grass to get to their preys. Human beings are consummate actors and wear masks to conceal their intentions. These masks form what is called a “persona” and these personas and masks change depending on the people we meet. Human beings are not linear creatures, they are unpredictable and highly volatile. Human beings are not constant and can change at the snap of the finger. This is an evolutionary trait, the ability to adapt to different environments and survive. Be wary of anything a human being says because 9/10 times, it’s an attempt to deceive you. Never take anything that a human being says to you at face value to be accurate, in fact, what another human being says to you is irrelevant, it doesn’t mean anything – look at the actions and you’ll have your answers. Human beings are liars. It is engrained in their DNA. It is nature. From as early as 3 months an infant will fake a cry to get the attention of his/her caregiver. Beware of the false prophet who professes to have all the answers. All is fair in love and war. Words are super strength power for Superman like they are for a human being. Words are a superpower. Words mask true intentions. They deceive. They lead astray. They are poison. They make you yield. They manipulate and control. Someone professing to love you doesn’t mean anything and anybody saying his a friend is not necessarily a friend. It’s doublespeak, an attempt to lower your guard. This evidence suggests that deceit works and hence, we do it unconsciously. Deceit gives you momentary momentum and short consistent strides can elevate you to the top of the hierarchy. This is what life is all about, who has the better hand? All of life is a game, guard your winning cards and strategize your moves for maximum output. You best attack is defense, understand words don’t mean anything and they can never get to you. Action is the true language of the Universe.
Luckily we have ways to spot a good friend. A true friend is one who acts more than he talks. A true friend always shows his values. A true friend is someone who wants the best for you. It’s someone who recognizes you as his brother or sister. A true friend will never let somebody talk ill of you in his presence. A true friend is not a gossip. A true friend has a growth-mentality. A true friend is one who motivates you to being the best that you can be. A true friend understands that if you do great, then the whole of humanity benefits. A true friend is someone who celebrates your great news like they were his. A true friend is someone who is emphatic and assists at times of great distress. A true friend is someone who listens to your boring long story and stays engaged with it. If you tell your friend something and they start making the conversation about them, switching it up, telling you about some grander thing that happened to them, then sorry, you do not have a friend. A true friend cares about what you have to say because it pertains to your well-being. A true friend would never break your frame. Besides, this is about reciprocity, one day they will do the same for you; would you appreciate it if your friend took the spotlight off you? A true friend doesn’t change because the love is organic and has compounded over the years, it serves as the permanent persona in his structure of being. A true friend treats you like how he treats himself. A true friend talks positively about you because he sees himself/herself in you and is grateful to be acquainted with you. A true friend is someone who wants you to grow because selfishly, it will make him/her better. A true friend will always be on your side and advise you of your shortcomings. A true friend makes the initiative. A true friend loves being in your company. A true friend makes you feel good about yourself. A true friend helps you crystalize your thoughts so they are at least clear to you. You cannot be afraid of telling your friend how you feel or your good news. If your friend doesn’t know anything real about you, then they are not a friend. A true friend is a crutch, something that will help you to stand up when your legs give up on you. It is difficult to find a true friend because a true friend is somebody who loves you and to have that mutual connection is WOW; this is because life is difficult and we live in a capitalistic system that says to survive, you have to discredit and kill another. It is a system fostered on greed and monopolistic power and control. This means sooner rather than later, egos clash and the end result is a massacre. When you have a true friend, egos take the back seat because you both understand that it’s not real. Friendship is a mutual contract of love, collaboration and understanding.
Be with people who want the best for you. This shapes your reality and dictates what is projected onto the objective world. People who want the best for you want you to progress. They are a nurturing place for dreams. They help you move forward in the world. They have a herd mentality that is infectious and is dictated by the unconscious force of winning. Birds of the same feathers flock together. Understand your environment. Understand the purpose of the people in your life. This is important because this will dictate your thoughts and thoughts are life energy. Understand what you want to achieve out of life and strive to get it with the aid of like-minded individuals. Like-minded individuals are friends because you all share the same goal. The goal of winning the soccer World Cup final. Weed out people who are not conducive to the way you want to live. Weed out people who have no utility in your life. Weed out people who make you drift. Weed out the people whose words are not in line with their actions. This will keep your mind clear and you’ll be able to make better informed decisions. Fake friends camouflage themselves in a crowd of people so they can take a shot. They do this maim you, to assassinate your character, to get you to lose confidence in yourself. They do this with passive aggressive language disguised as jokes or something to take lightly, and as we know, it’s not jokes and it’s not funny. Eliminate them swiftly and clear the room as soon as possible. This will give you room to see an attack when it’s coming. It will enable you to better prepare your tactics. There is nothing worse than being killed by a cowardice accident murderer. Someone who lurks in the dark like a thief in the night. No, when you kill a king it has to be in the presence of everyone. Get rid of the toxic influences in your life. Get rid of people who project negative things onto you; “you can’t do it, not me!” We all have insecurities that is not an excuse to break someone’s frame, in order to feel good about yourself. Stay away from angry people. Stay away from unlucky people. Being around fake friends is dangerous because they can make deals that spell out your demise. You’ll never see it coming too because of their fake genuine smiles. Do you know how they are going to get to you? Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do. Be prepared. Keep your circle small and concentrate your forces, you can delegate and outsource everything else. Keep your mind clean because the Universe is mental. If you do not have a true friend, it’s fine, it’s better to navigate the world alone than to have pretenders by your side, it’s better to not delude yourself, it’s better to stand alone – you will stretch farther. You will lead a more fulfilled life, you will be strengthened by your truth and the gates of reality will open up more for you. You will attract genuine things, you will be happier.
A man who has money is beauty for women just like how men look for beauty in women. Granted you wouldn’t marry a woman for her beauty but it sure helps. Money is attractive, money is intoxicating, it has the promise of fulfilling all your dreams. Visions of not having to struggle anymore, gracing balls wearing designer clothes burdened with sparkling diamonds that hang on your neck and wrists, driven in luxury and escorted by royalty. Which girl wouldn’t want to be Cinderella for a lifetime? This time the magic doesn’t dissipate, the clock keeps ticking, the fairy godmother on speed dial and the glass shoes keep on multiplying. Living in Mansions, walking on marble, oversighted by crystal chandeliers, swimming in heated pools and served by foreign butlers. There enters the Gold digger, the manifestation of every man’s fantasy. She represents a tunnel in the repressed subconscious mind. She fulfills you in every way you desire. She subjegates herself to you, granting you power. She soothes and fills what’s lacking in your life. She is your escape in a world were routine triumphs. She is exciting, new and forbidden, uses her body to make you yield into the temptation of her bosom. You can squeeze if you want to, that’s the whole point. She’s yours for a price. The esteem and prestige of being your wife, but no prenups. Also, she wants to be included in your will, a stake in the inheritance fund and half of everything you own and oh, she’ll get it all. Her cunning intelligence guarantees it. You are her gold mine and she’s not letting go. Unlike the typical woman who operates with the right hemisphere of her brain, she is a blend of both hemispheres, she is both feminine and masculine. She is not just a woman whose emotional and acts on her feelings, she thinks, she plans, uses reason and logic, she has drive, she is ambitious! You are the route to her Gucci and Louis Vuitton bags, bespoke designer clothes, red bottoms heels and summer vacations in Monaco.
It was difficult to defend against the Blitzkrieg attack because it enveloped the enemy and crushed it with great speed. It gave you no time to think, no space to move, you were crushed by the weight of the attack. The perfect gold digger is akin to a blitzkrieg attack. You’ll never see it coming, she will crush you and dispose of you faster than the speed of light. Great gold diggers will seduce you, play to the repressed qualities of your being, ascentuate their body features, lower the pitch of their voices, play the demsel in distress, regress to a childlike persona, dominate through passivity to sink their claws in, marry you for your money and then divorce you. They are the definition of deception and smokescreens, they disappear like an illusion, like a dream, like it never happened. After you it’s on to the next one. You have to admire gold diggers because they are ambitious, they are driven, they have will, they want a good life and you are a means to an end. Gold diggers have balls, what makes them great is their ability to tap into their masculine sides while maintaining their femininity. That ambition will get you everything in life. I would love to be a Hugh Hefner, a magnet for gold diggers. To be surrounded by young, hot, beautiful women and have the relationships be platonic and transactional, using my pool and walking around the house in nothing but their birthday suits, oh Hugh cracked the code, the Playboy Mansion is heaven!
In our modern world the word power seems to make people uncomfortable, it has negative connotations of greed, evil and corruption. It is undesirable and dirty and no one seems to want to admit to the world that they want power. We like to convince people and ourselves that we are saintly and good individuals who care for the well-being of others. We imagine that we are pure and we would never hurt or kill another person in cold blood, that it is always the other person who is the aggressor and not us. We deceive ourselves and repress this urge for power relegating it into the shadows. The truth is that everybody wants power. The world is one big power struggle, the clash of egos combating to be the alpha. Dominance, it keeps our blood boiling and we hunger for it like a starved prisoner. Standing over your body makes me feel good. I yearn to make you submit to my will and my point of view. Power is everything, it is control and persuasion. It sucks to not be able to persuade anybody, it makes you feel weak and not in control of the situation. You feel like a bystander, a passenger moving along with the wind blowing you away in every direction. It makes you feel like a victim of life. Power puts you in control, you become a creator, a God. A God, that’s what everybody secretly yearns to be. To have undisputed power and influence over everything and everyone. In pursuit of this untold power, life creates a Hitler and a Stalin. Because If God is a fabrication of the mind created to derive meaning in an absurd world then maybe I can fill that gap, I can be God and control peoples perception of reality. He won’t intervene because his not real, I am God now and I will prove it by starting Wars and conquering other nations. All is power and that’s the motivation for serial killers, to kill, plain and simple. Jeffery Dahmer murdered people for the power it gave him, it gave him a rush, it was intoxicating, he felt powerful knowing he separated your spirit from your body. He kept souvenirs, his victims skulls, skeletons and took pictures of the severed body parts to remind himself of the power he had over you. It was the same with Charles Manson, he had the power of persuasion, he recruited young girls to his cult and convinced them to commit horrendous crimes. If I live in your mind, I can convince you to slit somebody’s throat from ear to ear and that’s what Manson had, permanent residence in these girls minds, they revered him, going so far as calling him Jesus. Power is possession, it is psychological, it is forceful, it is desirable. If I have power over you, I can do whatever I like. The denial of the desirability of power leads to slavery because the shadow has taken control of you, your undesirable impulses and urges needs an outlet and so you disregard my right to life as a human being to justify your repressions, so you humiliate me, break me down, vilify me to feed the beast that has taken control of you. You don’t even feel bad about it because you are a good church going Christian who believes in community and doing the right thing.
Power, you have to be aware of the laws to get to the pinnacle. The victims of Jeffery Dahmer had one thing in common – they took the free lunch. Maybe Dahmer was charming and charismatic, it would certainly explain how he lured them to his place, but if someone offers you a big paycheck for something menial then that’s a red flag because they are after your soul. That’s how Harvey Weinstein comes into the picture. “Suck my dick and you will get the part. Come on, every young actress sucked dick to get to the top”. You suck his dick and there’s no coming back, his got power over you. He lives in your head rent-free. Worse is that you need this, you a nobody and his a Billionaire who controls Hollywood. What you gonna do? It’s easy to despise the free lunch when you are not hungry. If you depend upon your own arms, you stay hungry for a while maybe for a long time but you have your power and it accumulates. Who knows, maybe in a couple of years you become a big player in the game. Power, you need to delay gratification to attain it. Sucking executives dicks will only make you a pawn. Elizabeth Holmes played the game of power beautifully. She was charismatic and magnetic. Used theatricalies and fed peoples need to believe. She modeled herself after her hero Steve Jobs by embodying his spirit. She wore the type of clothes Steve Jobs wore, copied his mannerisms and how he used to present his products to the world. Investors thought that she was the next Steve Jobs, they saw Steve Jobs reincarnated. They gave her millions for her company. They fell in love with her. She graced the covers of top magazines like Forbes and Fortune. She was labeled a genius and an innovator despite the fact that she hadn’t produced anything revolutionary. Everyone mistook appearances for reality. Her company Theranos was a hoax. She deceived everyone to get to the very top, meeting world leaders and presidents in the process.
Like on The Godfather, power like war is deception, never let anyone know what you are thinking and you hold all the cards. That’s where Santino Corleone got it wrong, by revealing what he thought he compromised the family, he showed Sollozzo that the Corleone family were not united in the decision to not operate in the narcotics business and Barzini took advantage. Power is double standards and smoke screens and Barzini played the game beautifully by keeping his hands clean and getting Sollozzo and Tattaglia to do the job for him while he sat on the sidelines and pulled the strings. Santinos mistake nearly cost the family everything, it was through the grace of God that Don Vito Corleone survived that hit. Power is getting people to play the cards that you deal. Power is cunning and deceitful. Power is concealing your intentions, like Heyman Roth pretending to be an alliance for Micheal Corloene while at the same time plotting his death. Power is crushing your enemy totally like when Michael Corloene assassinated the heads of the five criminal bosses all at once to cement his power at the helm. Power is power, it deserves its negative connotations.
I love my husband. He is everything I want and need. He brings so much meaning to my life. We have two wonderful children that I adore. They are my life. By normal standards, I have everything money, safety, security, two perfect children and a loving husband. I should be happy and fulfilled. I have a great career doing something that stimulates my mind, something that I love. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. As of late, my energy is low and I have a problem motivating myself. My life has become bland and insipid. Everything in my life is ritualistic and passive. As a young girl, I thought marriage would give me a happily ever after. Not that I don’t love my husband because I do, he is so perfect and he treats me so well. I honestly don’t know what I would do without him. Still, the question remains. Is this it? Is this my life now? Everything has become chore. The spontaneous life has receded to the past. We don’t have sex that often and when we do I fake orgasms. I wonder if he notices. I doubt it, I’ve been faking for so long that it has become impossible to detect. I have become an expert liar, the moaning’s are now automatic. Not that it’s a bad thing, I have to do it, it reassures him of a good job. To be fair, he sometimes does a great job but it’s in the minority. I remember a time when we used to have sex every day. A time when he drove me crazy. A time when he used to make me come multiple times in a session. A time when we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. A time when pleasing him was top of the agenda. A time of imagination, oral examinations and forbidden sex positions. A time of clarity and excitement. When everything made sense. When my life was easy to love and loving myself was easier.
I understand that we have been married for 10 years now and the romantic phase has to die down. That we need to be responsible and competent adults. But it’s not about the sex. It’s not even about my relationship. On the contrary, my relationship with my husband is perfect. We have an understanding and we are both happy with one another. It’s something else. A void. I feel like I am living a lie. I feel like a robot, passively getting work done. At times I am emotionless. I don’t get pleasure out of life anymore. I feel overwhelmed by life. I am confused and it makes me sad. What do you give a woman who has everything? Am I ungrateful? No. However I am close to apathy. My low levels of energy are making it hard for me to participate in life. It’s like my body is in comatose, completely paralyzed by the sadness in my soul. Maybe I am depressed. Maybe depression is a real condition. It wasn’t something I took seriously but how do I explain the apathy I feel? Do I even want to participate in this mindless, passive, repetitive mode we call life? Unfortunately, I have to. For my husband, my children, my family so we can navigate the world successfully. So I will just have to power through and be supermom, do it with great zeal and enthusiasm, with a smile, no one can know how I feel. I imagine it would be hard for my husband and I don’t want to trouble him. I don’t want him to think that his not doing enough because he is. I don’t want him to blame himself for my lack of happiness. Besides, depression is not a real condition. We all have bad days. Maybe, it’s a phase, I’ve just recently turned 30 and the second phase of my life is in commencement. Perhaps, I am in mourning for younger self. I don’t know. I just feel empty and dead inside. Despite the passing time and the orbiting of the planet my life is fixed and stagnant at one point.
I met Steven at his suite for an interview for the newspaper. We used to date when we were in High School, 16 and in love nothing could come between us. He was my first love, the person who made me conscious of this abstract thing call love. He is now a respected member of the socialist party. He is powerful. I can’t wait to meet with him. The newspaper sent me over to cover the story of his alleged infidelity, the story is making rounds in the country and we want to cover his side. It was hard getting him to commit to the story, we had to promise heaven. The chance to put things straight was too good for him to pass up on, we had to appeal to his ego and narcissistic side. The rumours were rouge and good PR was needed to spin the story, at least that’s what his advisors would have advised him. 14:00 struck and I went to his suite to meet up with him. He had grown up and had traces of someone I used to know. Was he the dashing young boy I fell in love with? Of course he was a man now and his attributes screamed that. He was well defined, groomed, trimmed and slim. He looked so good in a suit. He didn’t look at all like the boy who used to fondle with my breasts. We exchanged pleasantries and sat down. We engaged in small talk and were nostalgic about the past before we could get down to business. Our meeting was upbeat and energetic. I felt like I was in the moment. It was as if the world were moving again. We came around to the infidelity and he responded that the news were all false. He told me that it was just a political campaign meant to tarnish his name with the elections around the corner. He knew the alleged woman but not enough to be a lover or even a friend. They just met at two separate public functions and enjoyed each other’s company. He explained that he had no contact with her whatsoever. With that omission, the interview was over and we decided to talk off the record as friends. He asked me if I was happy. Reluctant, I replied yes. I could see it in his eyes that he wasn’t content with my response but he didn’t want to impose himself. He told me that he was not happy. That the pressures of life are getting to him. His work and the need to be exemplary is exhausting. The political games. His life splashed on the newspapers and prime time bulletins like it was entertainment and the constant pressure from his wife who seems to like the benefits that come from being the wife of a highly esteemed and powerful man. To be fair, who wouldn’t? The money, the designer clothes, the parties, the fame, the respect. Who would want to give that away? And for what? Because you’re depressed? That is not a real condition. People are dying in Africa. He told me that he feels trapped in his life that he feels like a slave. That he has lost his passion and most of the time he is just on auto-pilot. There was a silence on the table for a while and then he continued. He said that he recognizes that same sadness in my eyes to which I didn’t respond. I told him that it was a great meeting and that we should meet up again. He agreed. I stood up and he showed me to the door. Just when I was about to go out, I had the sudden urge to kiss him. I kissed him and he seemed to go with it. He passionately pushed my body towards him and held me tightly as he closed the door. We continued kissing and it was so hot and steamy. It was intense and I was so horny. I displaced my lips on his and kissed him on the neck while I took his shirt off. I continued with the kissing process and made my way to the torso. I kneeled down and took off his pants and started giving his oral pleasure. He held my head and controlled the motion of the strokes. The movements started of slow and gradual and then sped up with intensity. He was groaning and I could tell that he was about to climax and I let him come in my mouth – it was intoxicating!
Steven makes me feel like I can fly. He makes me feel like I am free. I have found a new lease of life. Yesterday was exciting. The thrill, the adrenaline rush of being caught out. The irony of the interview we set up. He understands me and how I am feeling. I wonder if he talks to his wife about his concerns and his feelings. I can’t believe I gave him a blow job. On the first day? It was like I was possessed by a love demon who took a hold of my body. When he caressed my breasts something in my head exploded and I was no longer in control. I was listening to a song by Amy Winehouse called Love Is Blind and it dominates how I feel because I relate. In the song Amy is unapologetic about his infidelity. She is ironic and condescending. Her arrogance is admirable. Her justifications are laughable. She’s not really explaining herself to anyone. She is at peace with all the repercussions. On the famous song she states “You are my everything, he means nothing to me. I was thinking about you when I came.” I love the song but don’t agree with the tone of the song. I care for the repercussions. I love my husband, I love my children and I don’t want to lose our family. However, I was thinking about my husband when Steven came in my mouth. The experience helped and I came home later that day rejuvenated. My husband and I made love and I moaned with pure pleasure. He sent me to the moon. Maybe my interaction with him is good for my marriage. I want to see where this will end. He called me today and we agreed to see each other next week at a different hotel. I feel good about it.
We met at the designated hotel. He was so cold and distant. What had sparked his indifferent mood today? Was the world out for his head again? The hypocrisy of hotel rooms. On my way to the room I was in incognito, I had my shades and scarf on despite the fact that it was 36 degrees. Surely, that constitutes as suspicious behaviour. I didn’t think things through, I was too locked up in my own world that I failed to look at things on an objective criteria. The woman in the elevator besides me at 13:00 pm is surely like me. Why conceal myself? Why hide what I came to do in room 424 of this hotel room when everybody knows. The staff surely know, the concierge, the receptionist, I am just another number. We all have the same problems but act like ours is different. While in the room with Steven I think about how amateurish I must have been and vow to do better next time. It didn’t take long for me and Steven to get intimate. He had an aggressive demeanour this time and he went on the offense. He pressed me up against the wall and started kissing me passionately. He started with my neck and then proceeded to the lips while he took off my shirt and bra. Now half naked, I took off my skirt while he also undressed. He carried me to the bed and started kissing and sucking my breasts. It was slow gradual kissing until he made it to my torso. At this time I was overcome with pleasure and I wanted him to go down on me. He took off my panties and turned me around. I was on all fours. I had the stature of a dog, a bitch. In that position, he penetrated me from behind not in my vagina but anus. It was painful and yet pleasurable. It was like walking on hot coal, it burns the flesh but the adrenalin rush is at its peak and telling you to go on. The moans and groans where real emanating from a real place – pain but I didn’t want him to stop. And so he kept pounding and pounding. To keep myself from screaming I put a pillow on my face and then it was done. He signalled that he was coming and I let him come on my breasts. Afterwards, we just laid on the bed for a while. We didn’t engage in a dialogue, the room was quiet. He got up from the bed and started putting on his clothes back. He then made a contribution on how to remove the odour. The advice was that I take a shower first thing when I got home. He also talked about the stains that will undoubtedly make their appearance on my underwear. He seemed like a professional. Did he do this on a regular basis? Am I one of his targets, his victims? I was thoughtful. What happened here wasn’t love. He humiliated me. He objectified me. He violated me and left me with no dignity. I was his slave and he did what he wanted with me. In my mind, I told myself that I wasn’t going to see him again. That it was over. Until, he said “this was fun. We should do this again.” I replied, “yes it was fun and most definitely we should.” I wasn’t lying, I would like to see him again and yes it was fun. It was my first anal experience and of course it was difficult but it was new and fresh. In that moment, I was alive and engaged in the process. Pain notified me that I was present and it felt good. It will be even better next time.
I am in a better mood these days. I wonder if my husband and children have noticed. I wonder if I am exhibiting strange behaviour. I feel like I am on top of the world. I feel in control. I see more colour in my life. Not that I am condoning my adultery but my sex life with my husband is better. Our love-making sessions are reunions that are breath-taking. They are unbelievable. I don’t have to fake orgasms because they are real now. I now have an appetite for sex and so it’s frequent. Before we would have sex twice in a month if we were lucky. Nowadays twice is the minimum requirement for the week. I am sure my husband is suspicious but he doesn’t say anything so it’s fine. Orgasms are a beautiful thing. It’s like an explosive in your body. An explosion of pleasure. Those few seconds are the most meaningful of life. Orgasms bring dimensions and edge to life. Orgasms give meaning to life. I sometimes think of Steven when I have an orgasm with my husband. It’s that Amy Winehouse curse, I am also starting to be unapologetic about my infidelity. It makes the lives of the people all around me better and most importantly I am happy. It has been a month since I have met up with Steven. I know I have to end things with him, he has become an addiction. What we have can’t be right for the immediate people in our lives. What we have is destined to fail. The problem is that I think I love him. I can’t stop thinking about him. He is all I think about. I am conflicted, torn in between. I have this fantasy that I want to explore with him. I plan to tie him up on the bed, get naked and sit on his face until he gives me multiple orgasms. I want to make him my bitch. I want to make him submit. I want to dominate him. My efforts thus far have been insufficient and my plan is in vain. I am meeting him on Thursday at his office and I don’t think that will be possible. This will be the last time I see him, he doesn’t know but I do. I love my family and I can’t carry on risking the life I worked so hard to build.
He told me to get dressed and that his secretary would be here soon. He was pensive and moved with great urgency. I lay naked on the couch and didn’t take him too seriously. What makes our affair great is the danger, the sense that it is forbidden and could damage a lot of lives. That is the pulse that kept everything moving. The chance to live life dangerously. It was seductive. It had a lure that both of us couldn’t resist. The fact that I am laying on his couch naked with his secretary on the way to the office, doesn’t move me, it doesn’t scare me. I am accustomed to the danger. Besides there are locks for unrequired entry and these locks seem to work just properly. We just had another session of mind blowing animal sex. We had a time constraint this time so we had to be efficient. Because I was adamant that this would be my last time doing this, I had to lead procedures. On the last run, I wanted to be ravished and pleasured to the maximum. I got in his office and sat on the chair. We engaged in pointless dialogue until his secretary went out. He stood up and went to the door to lock it. By the time he locked the door, I was already half-naked. My top was off indicating, “Let’s go!” He rushed to me and pressed his body onto mine and started kissing me. He kissed my lips, neck and made it to my breasts to which he caressed and fondled with them. He started kissing and sucking on my nipples, flicking them in a move that drove me absolutely wild. Sensing I would lose control. I interrupted him and created space in between us. I took off my skirt and panties and opened my legs. An invitation he took with both hands. He went down on me. It was the best cunnilingus I have ever had. With the tip of his tongue he stimulated my clitoris. Like a painter, the great Leonardo Da Vinci he moved his tongue left, right, and left, right in a gradual and clockwise manner and then it was rigorous and fast paced it left my mind in tatters. It was pulsating. He was concise, so engaged and he made me come. His tongue was like the tongue of the serpent. I was paralyzed by the pleasure. I indicated that I want him to come into me. While I masturbated, he took off his pants and underwear and in missionary position he started penetrating me. Sensing that he would come soon, I switched positions and went on all fours. He continued with the penetrating while I was groaning and moaning without a care in the world. At that moment I was free and liberated. I resided in the stars. I resided in forever. I was on the moon and it was pure pleasure. He signalled that he wanted to come. So I told him to wait for a bit. I adjusted myself and kneed down to give him a blow job. He moaned and groaned with his hands on my head controlling the motion. He told me he couldn’t hold it anymore and that his coming. I didn’t want him to come in my mouth so I stopped the activity. He came on my face. It was beautiful. It signalled the climax of our union. Of course he didn’t know that. It never occurred to him that it would be the last time seeing me naked.
We are not linear creatures and our behaviors constantly change depending on the people we meet. We create personas and present them as masks so we can be well perceived and liked. Basically we are all actors and we need to play our roles because if we don’t isolation is a big possibility and that’s not good because we need others to navigate reality. We are social creatures and this is a evolutionary trait. We also tell these “white lies” everyday like “How you doing?”, “I am good thanks”. We can’t say “Horrible, I hate my life and I want to die” because we learned that, that response will isolate us from people. We want to be well-liked. This is a big psychological urge hence the success of social media. Abraham Maslow explores this on his pyramid of needs.
Deception is everywhere in nature, predators hide in the long grass to get to their preys and infants learn to fake a cry to get the attention of their caregivers. Deception is an inherent part of nature. Everyone is a liar, there is no exception to this.
Still, I say if you are conscious about it. Tell the truth or at least don’t lie. Consciously lying is bad, it’s a sin and it leads to hell. Plus, every human being can unconsciously detect bullshit. We can feel it, no proof is required. If you are caught in your lie, it reduces respect and things will never be the same again. This is because trust is a very delicate thing. Trust is like a paper, once crumbled the creases will always be there. It also decreases your worth and tanishes your image, no one wants to be with someone they don’t trust. That leads to paranoia and a life of hell.
Always tell the truth or at least don’t lie. Be a person of integrity and good values. This creates order and you won’t have to remember your lies. This is attract genuine people to you and you’ll be happier.
Propaganda tends to have a negative connotation and it’s warranted, we saw what happened in the 20th century with Nazi Germany. What transpired was just pure evil, but it’s not just with Nazi Germany. Propaganda is everywhere. We see this with the depiction of Africa by the West. And how is Jesus Christ white again?
Propaganda is everywhere, we see it on our money with Nelson Mandela, he is always there, looking at you, smiling. Sandton City has a place called “Nelson Mandela Square” and it is a place designated for Mandela. It has art, it has statues, it has stores that sell Mandela gold coins, it has stores that sell the type of clothes he wore, it is Mandela heaven. Because Sandton is my home, I see Nelson Mandela every day. I believe his propaganda, I believe that he was a great man. I am surrounded by proof. Yes, I concede Nelson Mandela was a great man, easily one of the greatest men who ever lived. The propaganda makes him better than the “Greatest”. He has malls named after him, streets, hospitals, bridges and just about anything you can think of. The “Mandela” brand is a great brand and it is because of this propaganda.
Essentially what propaganda is, is Marketing and PR. It is showing only one side of the story in the best possible light repeatedly. It is biased and one sided. We see this with the advertising industry. Everyone is always smiling on Billboards and on ads and that KFC burger isn’t that great in real life. Propaganda is flattery and deception, it is what we humans do best. Social media has allowed us to propagate propaganda for our personal brands. We can take pictures and filter them to be perfect and then share with the whole world. We have more power than ever!
antakalipa 