She had everything. I was drawn to her like a moth to the light. She was mythical and beautiful like the 8 wonders of the world. She was alluring and ungraspable like water. She flowed straight into my structure of being. She mesmerized me and left me thinking of what could be. She hijacked my rational faculties and left my body in comatose – paralyzed and enslaved by her voice, it wasn’t that it was angelic but rather that it had a certain quality that bypassed my conscious mind. She spoke in a tone that was poised and almost tired, it was low pitched and effortless, almost resigned with a hint of would you like a Fellatio? Her eyes were suggestive and inquisitive. It was as if they wanted to know your dirtiest fantasies and part-take in them, as the leading lady – they demanded that credit, demanded to be the star, demanded to control and possess your body like a demon. Her posture, how she stood was a wet dream. She was phallic, completely erected on the ground like the Eiffel tower. A sight to see, there was no one quite like; her she commanded attention! Her walk was the stuff of legends. It was peculiar and affirmed in a way that made her a star on the runway. She was the brightest star in a universe filled with hydrogen and helium – explosive and her body was the bomb! She had the best boobs in the world – not that I have seen them but I have thought and fantasied about them. Not quite your watermelons but matured coconuts in the Savannah. Firm coconuts. Coconuts that can fit in your hands. Coconuts that can make all your dreams come true. The type of coconuts that had my mind spinning out of control – she was dangerous and she came with a label like tobacco. Addictive, I couldn’t help thinking about her and all her features. I was whipped a slave, confined within the looped structure of my brain. She was a sex symbol that I wanted to possess, every inch of her body I wanted my lips to touch, every organism would elect me in the realm of the gods – gratifying her sexual desires would be my purpose in life. She was a goddess, a work of mastery like Leonardo Da Vinci’s “Mona Lisa”, cavorted and renowned like the soccer World Cup and as such only cunnilingus will do anointed and knighted by the serpent in the bible. She was dangerous. Purposely stringing me along to hang myself. The more I chased, the more I lost control. The more I attached myself, the more she detached herself – a strategic, calculated ploy on her side. She was cold, whenever I told myself I was done, she would open her legs from a far provoking themes and images of heaven; it never occurred to me that it was just illusions. She was my escape, my ultimate fantasy. She represented a total release. She transported me to a realm of pure bliss and pleasure. She was a siren – striking and loud! An entity you cannot ignore but also subtle and indirect in a way that she made me fill in the blanks. Sure, I was repressed but she was better. She is an intelligent human being. She is my African Cleopatra, my Marilyn Monroe, she resembles Lucifer and acquainted me with the beautiful feeling of suffering, she taught me about love and projections – she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love her; My Marilyn Monroe.
When I think of her I think of “Fancy” by Drake on mega classic debut album “Thank Me Later”. The adlibs on that song are vitally important because they serve as praises on this high tempo song. The song is confident, elegant, boastful and proud. She was fancy; nails done, hair done and everything there! Why is make-up so effective in un-guarding and dissecting the psychology of man? Why is make-up so powerful? I think make-up is so effective and powerful because it means nothing. Make-up is a promise that can never be fulfilled. Make-up is exciting, it is seductive. Through make-up you can role play and live your wildest fantasies. It is a chance to create a persona for yourself – to be somebody else, to fly among the stars in the sky. It underlines the comical nature of life and our reality, the fact that we will always be kids at heart. As the burden of existence takes a toll on girls, they substitute role-playing with dolls to experimenting with different personas. It is in this time that we see a frequent change in styles of appearances. The different styles in appearances come with a change in personality. Make-up works on men because they are repressed. In the fabric of society, men represent order, custom and good-standing. They are the providers – the head honchos, the figures responsible for the livelihood of everyone else. The chance to be somebody else is almost too good to pass up on. The chance to be somebody else is found in someone projecting a persona, often in a form of make-up, hair and nails. You see the things that have no meaning are the most powerful because they play to our repressed sides – and well, everyone is repressed. Make-up is art that saves us from the horrors of the world. I love the Cinderella story. A young girl lives with her step-mother and step-sisters and they terrorize her with chores and abuse her psychologically on a daily. One day, she meets her fairy godmother and she transforms her – with a spell and magic, she creates the most beautiful dress and glass shoes for her to attend the ball in. We can safely assume that she had her nails and hair done too – it was a prestigious ball, the fairy godmother wouldn’t make that mistake. Prince Charming glances at Cinderella and loses his mind. The make-up, the hair, the nails had driven Cinderella’s stock at an all-time high, those attachments made Cinderella valuable. Prince Charming was seduced.
Fancy by Drake discusses the independent girl who is all about self-improvement and self-actualization. Something we also hear on Jay – Z’s “Lost Ones” on comeback album “Kingdom Come”, where he discusses having to break up with Beyoncé for a while because she was too immersed in her work and had no time for their relationship. She also had that, a focus that was unbreakable. She was vibrant with an energy that exuberated. She was hot – always in black because it communicated power, elegance, professionalism and dominance. Always in heels, so she stood tall, bold and proud. She had this tattoo on her leg that communicated her fun, wild and sexy side. She was smart and articulate, had the ability to communicate what was in her mind and to regulate other people’s emotions. She was open-minded and entrepreneurial. She believed in me, thought I was great, loved my work ethic and thought that one day all my dreams would come true. She wanted beautiful things for me. I told her “Thank you”. I thought that God was playing a joke on me. And he was, my life is in the future. I am not even sure when in the future, maybe in the form of my children. I feel like a sacrifice. In my heart, I know I will have everything my heart desires, with time but dear Lord, do you have more fancy women in my path? The type with reason and love in their hearts. Maybe I am being unreasonable so let me take the time to reminisce. I once met a woman who wore a mask, the world responded to her mask but I saw underneath her mask, I saw through the blinds of the windows of her soul, I learned to understand the structure of her being and because I was too immersed in her spirit I became vulnerable and unguarded. We now operated on the same level field. I pulled back, it was dangerous. Being acquainted with her mask was better, for it enabled me to have projections and fantasies about her. The external view was quite a view to behold, she was fancy.
Earlier in 2019, Kylie Jenner was certified the youngest self-made billionaire in the world by Forbes eclipsing Mark Zuckerberg who managed the feat at 24. Kylie Jenner managed this incredible feat aged just 21. She unbelievably owns a third of the lipstick market in the United States. Also she owns a hundred percent stake in her company ensuring that all the profits go directly to her. The internet and social media has been buzzing all year questioning the status of “self-made”, it’s a bold declaration, one many feel she doesn’t deserve considering her last name. She had been affluent and lived a life of luxury all her life. She had the resources and the infrastructure at her disposal. There was no process to her riches – it was like pushing a button. Fair arguments, however she had initiative, she had skill, she had business acumen, she had wit, and she had intelligence to carry out her vision. After all, owning a third of the market requires some sort of consistency and poise. Sure maybe she was lucky but should we strip the title of “self-made billionaire” because of that fact? Never. Reason being all successful people are lucky. Shaun Carter aka Jay –Z is lucky to be alive considering the life of crime he led as a young man. He was born in Macy in the projects of New York. To survive he sold drugs and often got in heated feuds with members of dangerous gangs. He is lucky to be alive. He was lucky he found a skill he could harness from a very young age. He was lucky he got a mentor who taught him about the music business. He was lucky he met Damian Dash and he was lucky “Reasonable Doubt” did as well as it did. Luck comes after a sequence of hard work, it is contagious and can be channeled. This is exhibited on the Kylie Jenner story. Her family, her sisters worked hard just so she (Kylie) can be “lucky”. Kylie Jenner is a self-made billionaire because the business she created comes from her spirit, her psychology, her insecurities – those are the elements that inspired her business model. The fact that she had the resources doesn’t disqualify her.
What are the origins of her luck? Two words. Kim Kardashian. She possess amazing power. Sure her parents had wealth but Kim gave the family as a unit influence. Influence is subtle. Influence sways heads. Influence creates movements and drives change. Influence is underlying. Influence is transformative. Influence is hidden and repressed. Influence is resourceful. Influence is true power. Kim Kardashian is a seductive animal that emits pheromones into the atmosphere for all to take the bait and follow. Ever since her entrance into public life she has had this aura that is irresistible for all sexes of life. Her public persona is the stuff of legends. She is like the new age Marilyn Monroe in the sense that she knows she belongs to the world – to the public. She has created an incredible brand. A brand that is synonymous with beauty, fashion, trends, outlandish, repressed, forbidden and popular culture. The brand she has created is truly amazing. Kim Kardashian has pushed the limits of popular culture so many times. From successfully monetizing an amateur sex-tape over the internet to popularizing apparel that left little to the mind to fantasize about in the fashion world. As a brand, the Kim Kardashian image signified ultimate freedom from customs and systems – her image incited promiscuous intentions, naughty actions, repressed desires, dangerous consequences, erotic fantasies and forbidden transgressions. The Kim Kardashian brand provided a release, a platform to showcase what is underlying and often repressed by society – a platform to be unapologetically you. It is a powerful brand because it enables people to project on to you their darkest and most repressed desires. It is a brand that elevates one to the status of a god. Who could argue Kim’s claim to being a goddess? After all, multiple time she had been all that people talked about on the internet and popular culture. Multiple times she had been what young girls aspired to become. Multiple times she had left men on their knees.
As a result of Kim’s popularity, a decision was made to create a “reality show”. The show would follow Kim and her family as they navigated the world. Central to the show’s theme was beauty. The Kardashians used the show as a vehicle to create a need. We would see the sisters resorting to plastic surgery to make themselves desirable in the eyes of the world. We would see the excessive purchases of designer clothes. The show was predicated on social status and the validation of society. It would leave the viewers empty and with new found insecurities about how they looked and the clothes they wore. It was effective and critical in forming this plastic life. The show was so detached from reality, an element that made it popular and alluring. Everything about the show was bigger than life and so it provided an avenue to escape from the tribulations of life. The show exploited a very critical area in human psychology – the need to be liked and accepted. Status symbols and extravagant purchases represented a remedy and a means to deal with the gaps and holes inside ones heart. In truth one was better off not watching the show than watching it because it was warfare to the mind. The show made minds passive and indoctrinated them into an abyss of misery. However it was a success and central to the Kardashians wealth. Many more spin-off shows were created and the beauty market boomed with the Kardashians at the forefront of everything.
It was Kim Kardashian who started everything for her family. She created a really powerful brand. She exemplified the brand, she lived the brand, she believed in the brand. Whether her public persona is different from her usual persona – that is a different story for another day. Brands are essential in the accumulation of wealth. Kim’s brand is believable. She is a siren. An attractive girl who has all the attributes and features to land any man he wants. Her body and voice solidifies that claim. Her detached demeanor and rich, spoiled girl behavior is what we expect to see and it is what she projects – a larger than life personality that is alluring and devastatingly seductive. Her image evokes all kinds of emotions. She is desired. It is as if she is the brand she created. If youth was forever, Kim Kardashian would be the most powerful woman in the world. However, life is disappointing and looks fade. Still, she is central to Kylie’s success. Kim was bold, daring and provocative. She had a creative energy and entrepreneurial drive that was like no other. She was different. In her prime, she became all that she could be. She was a success. She laid the foundations for her sisters. She gave the Kardashian family fame – something that fast tracks success in any domain. Fame is infrastructure. Fame is numbers. Fame is a chance. Fame is support. Fame is money. Fame is influence. Fame is power. Her spirit is immense and is felt throughout the universe. That frequency emits and ripples a chain of luck molecules – her sisters were the recipients of these molecules and it has enabled them to do amazing things. We are the products of our ancestors and immediate family. Kim and her family created a world that was so big and realistic that Kylie was immersed it in, Kylie was a product of that world and she owned it and took the vision further. Now, her responsibility is to push boundaries and challenge customs and conventions.
I don’t need a masculine woman. Life is already difficult enough, nah, it’s not worth it. You know, the type of woman who be saying “Feminism this, feminism that, patriarchy this, patriarchy that, 50/50 that, 50/50 this”. Fuck that shit, there’s no such thing as 50/50! We can work together but be my partner and not my boss. If you think you can do it alone then do it! You asking me out on a date? Hahaha, crazy bitch. What’s next? You gonna open the door for me? You modern women are crazy. Relax I am the man, let me do what I need to do. I will provide. I don’t need a masculine woman hiding under the guise of being ambitious and independent. Wear your blazers and pants out there, in here I expect floral dresses and skirts. How can two pants preside over a household? Go be CEO over there! I don’t need a masculine woman dominating me like a sex slave. “Do it like this, don’t do that”, No! I am not doing anything, you won’t be emasculating me. Don’t think you know, just listen, I don’t need your “straight talk” or “direct speech”, Miss “I tell it like it is”, you’re so full of it. Relax, I will solve the problem myself, all I need is for you to be emphatic and actually care. I don’t need a masculine woman, nah, put on some make-up, put on some perfume, wear heels, do your nails, get your hair done, wear that red number, be seductive, stimulate my imagination, exude the aura of a mthyical creature, give me the opportunity to busk in your glory – God’s magnificent creation, you. I am not asking you to lead anything, that’s my job. You crazy if you think I am going to let you boss me around.
I don’t need a masculine woman. Life is already difficult enough, nah, it’s not worth it.
antakalipa 