The different smiles are all ingrained in my psyche. Life isn’t about your senses, that’s deception, stay woke.
There’s a lot we don’t know and even that I know. Slow down fella, calm down, I know.
I am amazing, but control your emotions.
Just admire, compliment and let things be, move along, just a fabrication of reality.
You can’t Backstab me, I have things sorted, I am the best, it takes the best to beat me.
Just know when I strike, it’s game over. No chance, I wipe you out.
Let’s see how you play your cards. Control yourself fella, calm down, let’s be professionals, its okay, we can let this discipate into the sparks of life.
But it’s still on record, And I see you, I remember.
Man, I will never forget how Toy Story 3 made me feel, that is a classic movie, the score and musical arrangements were spot on, the animation guys, angles, cameras, shading departments, voice artists, writers, developers and everyone involved, well done for the magnificent job. Yea, “Toy Story 3” felt like it. Good job guys we had three outstanding installments, curtain call but not the guys at Pixar, they went for a 4th one and promised future installments with an epic finale! Yea, change is good. Woody just isn’t that toy anymore. I loved the 4th one, I was never disappointed, not once, I was constantly doing something, laughing, listening, being engaged with the program that I even cried, that Gaby Gaby act is deep, Gaby Gaby is not like Lotso or Stingy Pete, she just wants it to happen, she wants to be a toy that can be loved and played with like Woody once. Woody is a good guy and finally relents his voicebox to Gaby Gaby, his had his chance, bless another, we love the wisdom Shrieff Woody, and Buzz Lighter “listen to your inner voice” is the best thing ever! It has a bit of Nietzsche, children need some Nietzsche early on in their lives, give them some Karate kid to emulate, give them pride, instill confidence in their spirit, just do your best, love your kid. My first story movie was “Toy Story 2”, in 2000, I had it on cassette or VCR, whatever you call it, it was the most amazing thing ever, I liked Toy Story 2, I was in love. Toy Story 2 helped me have empathy with my toys. I always practiced caution, care and respect. I was never rough with my toys. I liked action figures, I had this cool Ninja figure with a red attire and Gohan super saisan 2 when he beat Cell, that was a big toy for me, very cool flexible, limbs and hands could imitate life, yellow hair and navy attire. A lot of my friends wanted it when I was young and so I made the executive decision to not play with my favorite toys when I was with other people. They would be envious and want to steal it away from me. No, it was not worth the risk, it was just for me eyes. “Toy Story 2” is the movie that started everything for me and then I saw “Toy Story” and it was the same for me but now, “Toy Story” was now my “Toy Story 2”
Chelsea will always be the club that I dispise. From my roots in England, Manchester United, you have always given me a tough time. Thank God for Cristiano Ronaldo, he is our “Magnifico” like Bruno Fernandes. He won us UEFA with his towering header. Sure Lampard equalized and sent the game to extra-time but we landed the first blow. It showed intent. Sir Alex Ferguson our leader. He gave us great moments, season after season, we won the trophies. Our worst seasons were always the seasons we finished 2nd, worse case scenario 3rd, so okay, that’s fine, we’ll go at it again the next season. That’s the lose I want in my life, Fergusons’ lose.
My story doesn’t only come from Manchester, my Chelsea story has its roots in Barcelona. From the Champions league 2009 semi-final in Samford Bridge, thank God for Iniesta, he won us the whole tournament. The semi-final was hard but we just needed 1 goal because the game ended scoreless at the Camp Nou. We got it in the 94th minute, with virtually the last kick of the game, I will never forget that day. Iniesta saved my life. Assist from Messi, who else? We won all 6 trophies, well done to Pep Guardiola for achieving that impossible feat. Puyol as our leader, the last pure defender. I will never forgive Chelsea for what happened in 2012 though. Such negative tactics at the Camp Nou. If we had scored that penalty, we would have been free. How can you miss that penalty Messi? But okay, it wasn’t our day. The last memory I have of that game is Fernando Torres rounding off Victor Valdes. It breaks my heart, I wish I could change it. We deserved so much better. We were by far better than Chelsea. We had the best chances but somehow they won. I knew Chelsea would win the Champions league that year even against the Germans in their stadium, the Allianz Areana. I mean Arjen Robben got his penalty saved by Peter Ceche. A whole great Arjen Robben, before that in the semi-finals Messi missed. This was Chelsea’s competition to lose and they didnt. I will always hate Chelsea for winning that tournament that year because they deployed negative tactics. They parked the bus and we couldn’t get through. We tried everything. We had Cristian Tello, Isaac Cuenca, Messi, Xavi, Iniesta and Cesc Fabregas and we couldn’t get that illusive third goal, we almost did, but we couldn’t. The Germans also didn’t have an answer for Chelsea’s negative bus parking tactics and worse they played that final in their own Stadium. Chelsea not only frustrated the Bayern Munich team, they frustrated the fans in the stadium and everyone watching around the world. Pep Guardiola announced that he was leaving Barcelona that week after the defeat. It was the worst week of my life and I credit Chelsea Football Club.
I don’t need no favors from anybody. I don’t owe anybody a favor. Everything is lined up for the taking. Take your free lunch with, I am packed. I don’t need no handouts. Some of yal are too entitled. Relax, you ain’t help with shit. I don’t waste my time with niggas, I just set my price and live my life. If you serious we can talk business just don’t waste my time. Some of yal are good with the dice, you take chances. Know your story chief, I am not doing a job with accident murders. Quitting on the mission is not an option neither, this is death ground strategy, stay strapped. Don’t surrender alive, that’s the way of the warrior!
I don’t need no favors, let’s collaborate on something that is mutually beneficial. Enough with the naivete, we not children, we are not doing this because we “like” each other. Let’s discuss terms, roles and profit share. Let’s be professionals, everything else is secondary.
I don’t need no favors from anybody. I don’t owe anybody a favor. I am winning in either case, everything is lined up for the taking.
I have simulated losing everything in my mind. This is a stoic exercise that helps me conquer fear. Because if I am comfortable losing everything then I am free. Free to self-realize. Free to be what destiny intended. Free to be great. Life is broader than material things. Life is emotions, perceptions and sensations. Life is awareness. Life is presence. Life is precious. Life is a miracle. Life is a beautiful process that keeps on getting better. Life is evolution and progression. Life is freedom. Life is creation. Life is love. I realized a while back that earth was heaven. Heaven is not some utopia that you get to. Heaven is already within. Heaven is what you create and God gave us complete control of our minds to create. Expression is creation and mind is expression. This is it. It doesn’t get better than earth. It doesn’t get any better than this, this moment. It doesn’t get any better than what is within. You have the responsibility to create your own heaven, heaven is a state of mind. My heaven is one where I am a Billionaire. Being a Billionaire for me represents infinite creation. A chance to implement my dreams and to color in the world. It is a chance to help. I’ve got a big heart and at my core I am love and I want to give life to that expression. I’ve never really cared much for materials, I prefer creating experiences, they last longer. Still I’ve always loved money. Money is power. Money buys a priceless commodity, time. But it is also external, which makes it dangerous because it is out of your control. Because it is external, it can make you suffer because of the imprints you attach to it. Money can repossess your soul. The love and worship of money can make your heart leak like bullet holes. That’s if you identify with money. I just see it as a tool and I don’t want life to elude me because of a lack of it. That’s not what God intended for me, I live in complete abundance, everything I want is mine. So money can’t be a hindrance. From a very ripe age, my visions of the future would be of me working towards that ideal of attaining riches. I suspended everything for this vision and narrowed my focus and it created a fear that I’d be alone. It’s a fear that has manifested itself onto the world. I finally got a girl whose perfect in every sense. A girl who loved me before everything. She loves me and I love you. She is someone who can make me better, Lord knows I am flawed, messy and Imperfect. We can be better together. I need her. I don’t want to lose her. She takes care of me. Where else am I going to find this in this cold world where nobody really cares about me? Who has more value than her? I don’t know. Because of my flawed ambitions pertaining to money, I have to look ahead. Meanwhile time waits for no man. Paulo Coelho taught me that a woman can’t keep a man from achieving his personal legends and it makes sense for me. I am just ambitious that’s all there is to everything. Now that I am alone and have lost my best thing, now that the worst has already happened to me, I can labor on like a prisoner serving life in a concentration camp, with hope that everything will be better someday; Lost ones.
My son got born earlier in the morning and I am ecstatic. He is a gift from my ancestors and the Universe. I treasure him. He is my gold in a world that’s been digitized; valuable, tangible, priceless. It’s like falling in love for the first time, I am in la, la, land, heaven, a place of pure bliss devoid of the construct of time. I’ve never felt love quite like this, it’s like I am floating on butterflies through the clouds of the light blue sky. He makes me believe in miracles. There is a God, – he is proof, a blessing. I am thankful and grateful for this opportunity. I will teach him everything I know with an open heart and a lot of love. I will guide him. Help strengthen him to make sure he is the great man destiny intended. I’ll teach him about business and wealth creation. I was lucky I was broke and built an empire out of nothing. Being broke is experiencing your own mortality, it is being vulnerable and helpless to effect change or influence outside stimuli, that’s why I worked so hard to be rich, to have the illusion of immortality, to be invincible. You’ll be invincible from the start, girls are going to be sending you pictures captioned “you could tear this up”- I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. I’ll teach him about the importance of having an inner scorecard and not one based on external factors. Don’t claim to be anyone you’re not. Love yourself unconditionally. Respect everyone and beware of placing too much value on material things because they end up owning you, depriving you of your peace and happiness. When you say you are going to do something, do it, no excuses, be a man of your word my son. I’ll teach him about girls and women. True, they are an enigma and I don’t know much about their motivations and thought patterns. They are truly a strange species, unpredictable, highly volitile, sometimes unstable, frightening and devastating like a natural disaster. They are difficult to assess and understand, maybe they really are from Venus and us from Mars, it would certainly explain why it’s inhospitable for man; too much chaos presided, women can’t co-exist with one another and I don’t mean to boast but man is returning to Mars. Mars is a great place filled giant screens that showcase football and other sports daily, the home of Elon Musk, Richard Branson and Jeff Bezos, a place of sport cars and super sleek, fast Teslas, pool tables, infinite alcohol and drugs, no tough decisions, no responsibilities and no circumstances. A place of Goodfellas like Scorsese and De Niro but no death, just collaboration, a brotherhood and positive energy.
But in planet Earth, women are useful as you will soon experience. For one they register and process large quantities of data faster and more efficiently. This is important in the matters of life and death, you need a strong counsel. The trick is just to love and accept them as they are, don’t try to understand them or assert your will on them, understand that disaster might strike at anytime and accept reality for what it is – I think that’s what God intended. Just love them because even with all their uncertainties, they are the most valuable species in the whole Universe, they make life worthwhile, they are the nurturers of life. I’ll give you all the information I’ve attained from my interactions with them. I suggest you seek consultation from other wise men who will also share their experiences and knowledge, this will give you a more wholistic picture. I can’t guarantee concise data regarding women my son, no man can, we are from Mars and they are from Venus.
Of course, there’s this issue of the Oedipus Complex. I suspect there will be some hostility between me and you. You want to possess your mother (my woman) and you are rightly entitled to her. I won’t oppose you son, for the first few months, she is all yours. I will refrain from all acts of jealousy. I know you will appreciate those tits more than anything in the world. Your father is a genius, a visionary and I chose those tits for you. I qualified and discarded a lot of applicants for you to have those perfect tits. That’s my early gift to you because I love you so much. Enjoy them, take your time, don’t rush to get old, drive slow and enjoy the scenery and sensations. Those are our tits, my son, at least for now.
I want to love you and treat you well. I want to build a home with you and start a family. I want to kiss all your troubles away and watch them dissipate like entropy. I want to be with you for a lifetime. I love you, you are my soul mate and in my heart I know I’ll never find better. You are my special gem, my Queen. You are my heart, the pulse of life that’s keeps me moving. You are my future, everything I yearn to be. You are my heaven, a place of bliss where everything makes sense. I love you. I know I am not perfect, I know I am heavily flawed but that’s why I need you, to make me better, to take care of me. I feel like Jerry Maguire, “you complete me”. You make me want to be a better person. You make me feel like I can fly. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I would go through hell to see you happy. I love you, let’s stay together.
When you have the one you love in your arms. Is there anything better? Like “look at what I’ve got.” Thank you God for this gift. I’ve been looking for her all my life. I love you so much. Please be with me a lifetime. Love is good when it’s just shared by two people. No one needs to know. No social media. No one needs to approve. No expectations from the outside world. Just us and our mutual understanding. Look what I’ve got in my arms.
If I could just see Faith just one last time. Yes, definitely in my top 5. I met her through a friend. Easily the greatest pass of all time. Thank you mpinch, I am eternally grateful. I really needed that pass. It was difficult with Faith. I never would have gotten that close to her without my boy. It was impossible. What made Faith a mission was the fact that she didn’t live in Gomora, she came here to visit her grandparents. She was a cheese-girl. She grew up here in Gomora and that’s how my boy knew her. When they were younger, they had this kids romance thing. I first saw Faith in 2010, I remember it was game day and Argentina was playing Nigeria. Argentina won courtesy of a Heinze header in the 6th minute. I wasn’t particularly impressed with that performance. Messi or Higuain didn’t score and I expected better. After the game I went out to get some air and there I saw her. It was as if time stopped for a while, everything proceeded in slow motion. It was like I was in a Scorsese movie looking at the girl of my dreams. She was absolutely perfect. She had a million dollar body. Great ass, good thigh to ass ratio. Flat stomach, she was fit like Serena Williams. Yellow bone in complexion. She had frickles on her face. That day she had just done her hair so she was brand new. She was a stunna! I remember looking at her and thinking “Nah, not today, Argentina had a bad game. Messi didn’t score. I can’t do anything today, I am useless”. Of course, I was rationalizing the whole situation. The truth is that heartburn set in and I didn’t think I’d be able to talk to her. What was I going to say to her? After that I always thought about her, thinking about how I missed a great chance and how I’d do anything for another chance. It was a while since I saw here again, I think I saw her again after a year. I was with my boy and it was like 8pm and we saw Faith walking with her friend. I flipped, I was like “Yoh mfana, here’s this girl again”. The showoff enquired “You mean her?” and I said “Yes, do you know her”. He said “Sure, follow me.” I couldn’t believe my luck. We approached the two girls and hey what do you know he did know her. We talked and we exchanged names. Mxit was a dying technology but I knew that I’d be able to get Faith’s number indirectly through that medium. So I asked and she gave it to me. I also asked her friends number for some diversion. The whole interaction needed to be neutral. I deleted the friends number when I got home and started work on Faith. We started chatting on Mxit and it was good for a while, so we took things to the next level and went to Whatsapp. I am really not a social media guy so it was all for her. I asked to see her in the flesh and I told her that I liked her and gradually things started happening. We spent a lot of time together when she came visiting. She made my heart beat like bass. We would go on dates. It was great. On the second date I screwed up, I don’t know why I did that. I kept talking about this girl I had a crush on in Primary who attended school with her. The girl I was referring to was a stunna and Faith knew her even though she down played it. Next thing I heard was how she didn’t like how I spoke because used a lot of “Tsotsi taal” in my language like “Why don’t you speak properly?”. I was confused but I realized I was trouble like “that’s how I talk, I can’t change”. She hinted I was too ghetto for her. She started drifting away from me. The more she pulled back, the more I advanced. It didn’t look good. I came across as needy and insecure. I ended up letting her go. Lesson learned never talk about another girl when you are with a prospective. It’s a simple one, I don’t know how I missed that one. I wanted to make her insecure, it backfired; a fools failed attempt. I did some Introspection. Man, Faith was great, she was beautiful, smart, had a great sense of humor, banging body and her laugh was incredible. She made me feel like Superman every time she laughed at my jokes. She was top quality.
antakalipa 