We will things into existence. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t, but we never stop executing! Take multiple shots at it, have faith that it will work and it will. There can be no other way.
We will things into existence, everyday is play for us. We have imagination, unquenchable spirit, the eyes of a child.
We try out different combinations, undeterred by failure. Motivated by the truth that’s in our souls.
We will things into existence, we are blinded by biases, our faith makes us bend reality like an optical illusion.
We will things into existence, we don’t stop, it’s our mode of being, an expression of life, a statement of authenticity.
We are foolish, we are crazy, we are rebels, we are different.
We will things into existence. We have enthusiasm for life.
It inspires us. We love it!
We laugh, we share, we plant, we busk, we dare, we dream, we soar.
If you want to be something, be it! Anything you want in the world is yours.
Change is the only constant that’s why we are spiritually rooted to the pulse that beats all of life, existence, atoms in their simplest forms, a part of milky-lanes, among billion cosmoses.
Everything has to change, life is seasonal, it’s adaptation, metamorphosis of existence.
What worked in the past never lasts, even with controlled variables, nothing in this world is truly 100%.
Let’s all just be professional, no clinging, one amazing night was all that was due to you!
Stop being selfish, let other people have a go, or pay up, that’s the only way to get results.
Change is the only constant, I lied to get you into bed, I deceived you, I played to your insecurities, I don’t want you, get out of my sight.
Change is the only constant, we don’t share the same destination, the journey on the road was great, thank you, here’s my turn.
Don’t be bitter, no! I don’t just serve you.
Change is the only constant, it’s been great, thank you for everything. I wish you the best in your future endeavors, take care.
Enthusiasm is what keeps the world spinning. The will to do something and do it great.
Passion is not a prerequisite, it can be turned on and off like switch. Connecting you to your dreams like a neural link, illuminating your perception of reality.
Enthusiasm is what gets you to stand-up, to fight, to believe, to dare, to live life.
Enthusiasm is a state of creation, the Lego blocks of destiny.
Enthusiasm is to strive, to be hopeful about the future.
Enthusiasm is to give everything you have got. No excuses, I am accountable for my life, I am accountable for my decisions.
Enthusiasm is being a dreamer.
Enthusiasm is being crazy, at least for a while. Advancements of humanity are credited to madmen.
Enthusiasm is to take many shots, keep shooting, that’s how you get goals.
I had a foe disguised as a friend who spread rumors about me and I happened to be in attendance when his life crumbled and so I smiled at his misfortunes, it was a case of schadenfreude and I reveled in his suffering. He deserved it, two timing son of a bitch, why would I feel sorry for a monster? Crocodile tears don’t work on a porn star. I know I am evil but it’s a property and not a character like how De Niro paints houses and does his own carpentry. Let him suffer, that’s my official commentry. Body and bones decomposing in the cemetery. I have love but I can also practice hate, pulling heads out like masturbate. I have dark and impure thoughts. I hear voices in my head to push buttons and pull triggers. Killing in cold blood doesn’t lurk in my shadows, it’s illuminated by the sun. I am not a psychopath and indifferent to people’s suffering, but my schadenfreude episode felt good. I am emphatic but don’t piss me off for I can switch like a light, illuminating your ignorance and dimming out your sight. The smile is a facade and the silence a warning, you don’t know me. I am the offspring of Adam and Eve, directly related to Cain and Able, dangerous like a distorted label. I know I am evil, I am disturbed, I fantasize about murder and splattered brains. I pump out ice-cold blood in my vains. I am cold blooded and calculating, my brothers Cain. I might torture you and discard your pain.
Would you date a porn star? You know the woman whose taken cream to the face from multiple dicks. Dicks in the ass and piss dwindling from the throat making its way inside intestines. Oh, you a nasty bitch aren’t you? Pop that for big daddy! Would you be with a Porn star? A woman who has a body count carrying the essence of the phallus ancestry line. You thought you had Penis envy but now you have a woman who’s seen it all. Like “average penis fits in most pussies, big dicks are the real problem”. Oh really? Tell me more. Would you be with a porn star? Someone who has been choked into unconsciousness and passed around like a joint, smoking the character out of her soul and watching it dissipate like smoke. Daddy issues and expedient, victim-mentality and no self worth. Don’t fool yourself, it’s not in the past, the internet is forever and humanity is going to be jerking off to your girl till infinity and beyond. Would you be with a Porn star, someone to fulfill your wildest erotic fantasies? Someone to busk in your fetishes like an enthusiast. Someone who blows like a dryer. Someone to partake in your butt games. Would you be with a Porn star, a sex object for the gratification of your desires, a woman who belongs to all. Gangbang not a problem, as long as you let her call a friend. Would you be with a porn star, a woman whose attained mastery in all the positions, spreading it like butter so you can insert the ham. Moaning hard as a motherfucker so you are viewed as the man.
I say fuck bitches, no exceptions. Just when I start to like you, you go and fuck my best friend. Damn! You a special kind of serpent. Slithering your way into my life. Miss Mamba, cold blooded and heartless. You can never trust these bitches, they screw like rubber cause they are nuts. They never even yours anyways, just your turn like a blunt. Smoke good and pass like a drive by. Penetrating and piercing my heart with bullets dipped in cyanide. Killing all the love I had for you with your poisonous deceptions and disguises. Masks that conceal your true intentions and motivations. You slipped and landed on his dick, please. I say fuck bitches and remain autonomous like a Ruler. No attachments like a stapler and stay between these thighs, penetrating and breaking these walls like Jericho. Don’t let them break the code though, it’s no commitments like freelance. That’s her only chance. I say fuck bitches, I say this figuratively and literally. You just an option in a galaxy of stars. Get this pussy like a douche and bounce off like round ball. Hit and go, keep moving like a train en route your destination – heaven through her bushy lips. Don’t give them the satisfaction, private, your mission is done; you served your kind well. Bluetick the bitch and target another, it’s all a game. Play to win with minimal resources deployed for the mission. I say fuck bitches and leave your feelings at the gate. You are here for a job, commit to the task at hand, do it well, be professional, stay protected, no bitch is worth sickness nor death. Sow your royal seeds, Akeem. Don’t give your heart to no bitch, fuck bitches my friend – that’s their only utility. What’s the alternative? Don’t be ridiculous, she don’t love you. She got hard dick in her right now!
In 2019 film maker Todd Phillips released his psychological thriller classic movie titled “Joker” to much acclaim. The movie gathered 11 nominations from the Academy including Best Picture and Best Director for Todd. The film’s lead Joaquin Phoenix earned the accolade for Best Actor for his efforts. His performance was a masterclass on acting. The movie centers around the subject of nihilism. Arthur Fleck is a man in his late 30’s living with his mother in the hellish city of Gotham. When he was young he suffered a head trauma injury that affected the neuro-circuitry in his brain resulting in a cognition impairment that enables him to laugh uncontrollablely without his conscious doing. This mental disorder isolates him from society and it results in him being an outcast. With this being his default, he sinks into an abyss of apathy and depression. His loathes his life and fantasizes about and death. His hatred of life ultimately leads to nihilism and with that he begins killing people for the sake of it. The killing spree commenced when he shot dead three stockbrokers after they were assaulting him in the train. The action to kill those 3 stockbrokers comes after a history of apathy when confronted with life and people beating him up because his a “freak”. The killings change his outlook on life and apathy disappears forever, he finds a new release and for the first time in his life he encounters happiness, although sadistic, it comes from the action of interacting with the world and taking charge. Nietzsche states: “When an individual no longer feels like they are the collaborator let alone the center of becoming nihilism becomes a very real possibility.” This is what happens in the movie as Arthur’s dreams and prospects of being a stand-up comedian die and with the realization that his whole life has been a lie. With the quote of the movie he states before killing his mother: I always thought my life was a tradegy but now I realize it’s a comedy. This quote signals Arthur’s nihilism – the inference that there is no meaning at all. With this his reality changes and the mood of the film also changes from dark heavy burdensome strings serving as the score of the movie to uplifting golden soundtracks and Arthur dancing along with a big authentic smile on his face. It is as if his nihilism has triggered the button to live a fulfilling life. From this movie we gather that life is not fair. It paints Arthur as a victim and he is because his been dealt a bad hand from his inception. The movie is emotive, from the visuals, the setting, the camera techniques, the film score, soundtracks and the actors. This is a very good movie and will generate a cult following based on the subjects it explored. No one can really and fully prepare you for life. Nothing can prepare you for how difficult it is. How repetitive and passive it can get and how you can betray your heart with conscious intentions. Nihilism lurks in the shadows of every human being and if you give it an audience, it can consume you whole and lead you straight to hell.
Life is difficult. You wake up one day and the world tells you that you need to get a job and shed away your individuality. After all, you were in school for more than12 years, you had enough time to prepare yourself, you should know what you want to do. That’s how the world operates and so you get a job. You work hard to get a promotion but you are overlooked because the bosses niece just graduated. Feeling dejected but optimistic about the future, you keep your head down and keep working hard. Finally after 4 laborious years, you finally get ahead and earn a promotion. It’s that job you have always wanted and it comes with an office and a secretary. It’s bliss and you can see yourself working at this company for a long time and so you prepare. You have children, get married and buy a house with trees and high fences in the suburbs. You purchase that German car that you have always wanted and life is perfect. Tradegy strikes and the whole world goes into a recession resulting in you getting laid off from your job. But at least you get a settlement cheque and decide that you are going to start a business. It’s a good idea and you are excited at the prospect of being your own boss. The business doesn’t share the same enthusiasm though and fails spectacularly. The house and the German car gets repossessed due to failure of payment and you get blacklisted by the credit bureaus. Your wife divorces you without your knowledge and fleas with the children leaving you with nothing. Aged 44 with no savings and prospects do you have it in you to move on? Do you have it in you to start over? You thought you had forever and now you have nothing. You can’t even get a decent job because you have been blacklisted. What now? The future looks bleek. The world let you down. The order of the world is a lie, everything is a lie! To add insult to injury, the world doesn’t need you anymore, you are too old, young blood is coming into the fold and your are deemed useless, a fossil that occupied the land in the times of dinosaurs. Surely death is a better alternative to life because you have got nothing to live for. That’s life, sometimes bad things happen for no apparent reason and there’s simple nothing you can do.
What is the protocol for helping someone with suicidal thoughts? Is there something that can be done from preventing the inevitable? How do you persuade someone who suffers from nihilism that they have something to live for? It is a very difficult question. One that religion can’t solve because people who suffer from nihilistic thoughts don’t believe in anything. Besides religion regulates morality and people suffering from nihilism are victims of the very same morality. Just maybe nothing can be done, nihilism is the devils den, it is the place of no return. Not even Todd gave us an antidote in his movie. However, being an optimist I have a solution. Gratitude. Gratitude is positive energy and it enables one to reflect about life. Gratitude has reason. Gratitude is patience. Gratitude is life. Gratitude helps you see past today and makes you see tomorrow. Gratitude gives you courage, it is hopeful and at the same time provides assurity. Gratitude opens your heart. Gratitude gives you a reason to live, it gives you a reason to inquire and ultimately be a better person. For the gentleman who lost his job, wife and kids; the children will grow up and reunite with him. He can get a better confidant and work his way up again. He has reason to live. He should be grateful for the trails and tribulations and aspire to be better. Gratitude is what makes life worthwhile. Gratitude is the secret to a fulfilling life. Gratitude stops nihilism and gives reason. It is because of that that one should always be grateful. Grateful for our families, our friends and the fact that we have a roof over our head. Gratitude puts things into perspective. Gratitude is the only thing that matters if you are to live a fulfilling life.
I know female nature, I put it all under microscopic view. I refrained from judgment, I just observed. I studied all the women in my life, from the root canal to the most distance branch in the family tree. I studied Jane Austin, I thoroughly watched the Romance genre. I watched Cinderella she’s a unicorn; she’s wonderful, kind, caring, loving and compassionate – the dream of femininity. True female nature is exampified by her sinister step-mother Madame Tremaine and her two daughters, Drizella and Anastasia. I consumed the works of Adele, Beyonce, Alicia Keys, Sade and plenty of other love songs. I know female nature, I know how they think and go about things. I know what’s hidden in the deep recesses of their subconscious. I know all their techniques and how they make you yield. I know indirection is the gameplan. The ability to stay aloof but insight suggestions and paint pictures with fabricated personas that mean absolutely nothing. I know you just a tease like a bitch that’s all bark and no bite. I know female nature, I know the game is subtle dominance, to pull the strings like Geppetto but make Pinocchio feel like his a real boy. I know the game is possession, to cause trauma and split the core leaving the body in camotose. I know female nature, it wants your weakness so it can use it against you. The master of passive aggressive behavior, the founder of the silent treatment. Oh yes, I know female nature, I know you operate on the dark side of the spectrum, I know you’re evil, I know chaos is an alliance and you love destruction like entropy. I know, I know self-preservation is all that matters. I know female nature, it’s emotional, manipulative, deceitful, unstable and unreasonable. I know, I know often times the spark plugs don’t work and you go crazy. Sometimes it’s that time of the month but we know that’s just an excuse, you just a crazy bitch! I know female nature, I know how your love can be a facade, how you can love me today and cease to love me tomorrow like an abortion, a sin. I know, I know female nature, I know how you easily get bored and restless. I know you just wanna have fun. I know how I can never predict your cycles like a volatile market, I know I will never completely understand and that’s okay, no one really does.
There’s something funny about blatant racism, it’s not disguised like a mask or make-up for a George Lucas film, it’s in your face like a pimple, it’s direct like counterattack, the message is simple, you are beneath me like limbo. Humor centers around human nature, humor is human nature, it humanizes, it is tragic and like life a comedy. Humor is used to communicate superiority, it is a mechanism for suppression. Humor is used for relief. Humor is about inferiority. Mein Kampf is your definitive example of humor. Hitler is a bad motherfucker who blames the injustices of life on the Jews, he makes them the butt of the joke. He is small, petty and hateful. He calls the Jews bloodsuckers among other things. He is Hell’s orator, handpicked by the Devil himself. He propogates an image of fifth and unworthiness. Thank God he’s not a Jew, he’s perfect and was chosen by God and natural selection, the hypocrisy of it all! Like hey, “my God has a bigger dick than yours so I am going to kill your whole people”. Human nature is such a humorous subject. Apartheid is the funniest topic of them all – honorable mention the KKK, they have a flag, a uniform and burn crucifixes. Led by Dr. Daniel Malan, it is oppression at its finest. Imagine a political campaign centered around the term “Swart gevaar” which translates to “Black is dangerous”! The National Party fought the election on the twin slogans of “Die kaffer op sy plek” (the nigger in his place) and “Die koelies uit die land” (Indians back to India). Straight out of a scene from Mississippi Burning. 12 Years a Slave and Barry Jenkins’ Underground Railroad deserve a mention. I am convinced apartheid was a beef based on dick sizes, you know the stereotype about Africans and their cannons and whites with their palette guns. Where do you think the term “Mandingo” comes from? No it doesn’t originate from Tarantino’s “Django Unchained”. It comes from white racist slave owners to refer to the blacks huge dicks. All racism is a psychological phenomenon about dick sizes. I have additional proof, read Freudian Psychology, it’s a sensitive issue, whites are insecure about size. It’s only natural that the Kaffers and Koelies become butt of the joke, the punchline. You detect a bit of Nazi? You’re right! The National Party refused to support Great Britain and publicly sympathized with Nazi Germany. Dr. Daniel Malan serving as South Africa’s Adolf Hitler! As the Nationalists put it, “Die wit man moet altyd baas wees” (The white man must always remain boss). This is definitely about dick sizes, like “we hate everyone operating 9 inche equipment”! It’s so unfortunate that every man of color is classified in the 9 inche category, death by stereotype. To Hitler & Dr. Malan, I empathize with you big dicks must be intimidating! The insecurity makes me tear up, like a girl with small tits who supplements them to make them look bigger. The blatant oppression is a punchline on its own like “Big lips one side and whites to the otherside”, that’s the only criterion, that dictates your future.
I once had a teacher in high school who had a student stand-up in class and asked “You know what’s the difference between you and me?”. He held a pencil vertical to the students nose and the pencil touched his lips. Horrified a couple of us let out a nervous and uncomfortable laugh. It was a joke that bombed. The class wasn’t impressed considering it was a dig at all of us, we were Kaffers and he was Afrikaner. It wasn’t like Ms. Morello on “Everybody hates Chris”, she’s naively racist, but actually funny and she genuinely loves Chris (not really). I have to admit I like the character of Ms. Morello even though she’s a racist, she knows a lot about black culture, is enthusiastic and cheerful and let’s not forget dates black guys. Still her stereotypes are brutal, I am often torn apart between laughing and being flabbergasted. She’s the only racist with a green card in my book and like Chris, I can let her comments slide. Quite clearly she’s ignorant but she usually means well, I detect empathy in her tone of voice, she attempts to be understanding, she is not a malicious person, maybe passive aggressive and condescending but it’s a sitcom, I appreciate the work of the writers. Uncle Ruckus is the best racist character ever, that right there is pure comedy gold! Joe Rogen doesn’t get a green card, he called black people Apes, that wasn’t entertaining Joe, I mean you walked into a cinema in a black neighborhood and it was like “Planet of the Apes” – DAMN! Oh yea Joe, you not exempt from using the “n – word” NIGGA! Remember when Booker-T called Hulk Hogan a nigga? The regret on his face after he said it was priceless, cause the dreaded word just slipped out, that promo is the funniest of all time! But I digress. With my high school teacher, it was sadistic, it was an abuse of power and he was actually the minority, the pencil demonstration was a blatant middle finger. “What a racist fucker” was the internal monologue, so small minded, sad and primitive. No self-awareness, he thought he was making a joke but it boomeranged and laughed at him. He is honestly lucky there wasn’t a riot against him. The failed attempt at humor seemed to highlight everything that was wrong about him. He hanged himself with his own rope, it was sad, he was pathetic. There’s something funny about blatant racism.
I met a lot of amazing people this year, they are in my paradigm, I am also amazing, great sees great. Winning has become automatic, it’s expected, it’s easy, I just show-up. My biggest advice is to just invest in yourself. It yields wonderful returns. It took a while but I am finally turning a profit. Compound interest and time will reveal what I have always known, I am the greatest of all time. But I can’t be complacent, there’s a lot to improve on, results are not good enough, I am not where I want to be, I am far behind, I need to keep showing up. I must work harder, stay consistent, find a way to serve more people, automate my process, empower creatives. Satisfactory progress but I could do a lot more better. The focus is intense, attention specialized, care hands-on and the hunger keeping me awake. With consistency and care, I’ll get there, I will serve millions of people around the world. I need a great team of talented people to aid me in my quest, I need resources, I need infrastructure. I am just glad I didn’t give up on myself. It was difficult but I can say I made it. I can’t complain, I’m surrounded by great people. I don’t have regrets, I did everything I wanted, I am happy with myself. The voices in my head are barely audible and even when the volume pitch increases it’s not something I can do anything about. It’s something that only patience, luck or divine intervention can fix and I am cool with that because I understand nothing about the structure of reality. The universe is obsurd. I can only live in the present and enjoy the moment, to do what I can with the time that I have and in that regard, I am the best in every moment. I am the best in everything I do, that’s my state of being. I aspire to only deliver the best. That’s the best I can do. I never betrayed the little boy in my soul, instead I made him stronger, I never tried to appease anybody, it was always about me and my growth, I can live with myself, I am confident in my abilities, I am proud of myself. I don’t want excuses, I don’t want a baby to be my biggest achievement, there’s over 7 billion people in the world, God forbid but even if I don’t have one, I can live with that. Something more burns in my soul, it seeks expression, it yearns for a platform. I don’t know maybe it’s heroism, the fear of death tends to do that to a person. Even so, It’s only a matter of time before I win on a macro level, winning on a micro level is already automatic and unconscious.
antakalipa 